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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To just not know how to access the NHS

152 replies

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 17:21

I've not tried very often tbf, is there something I'm missing?

I started feeling unwell 4 weeks ago, just a standard cold. So I let it work through, but at the end was left with a nasty cough and completely blocked ears. Tried some home remedies, which didn't work, and then 2 weeks ago started feeling fluey, shivery achey etc. And my ears started leaking muck.

So clearly something infected, prob need antibiotics. I went to the chemist, who gave me a full list of questions, and then said they couldn't look at ear infections unless I was under 17. At the age of 49, I reckon she could have informed me of this before asking all the questions.

She advised me to go to the GP (next door) and ask for an urgent appointment. I knew it was going to be too late in the day for that, but went in to ask. They confirmed that I couldn't have an appointment, but looking at me thought I should be seen by out of hours, which I should phone after 6.15.

I phoned as requested, and after a triage I was told the Dr would phone back within 2 hours. They said it was likely I'd have to go to a location 30 miles away, which DH would have to take me to because although I drive ,I'm only insured on the work van for work purposes (yes this is ludicrous, but I've been quoted 4k minimum on the family car because I once ASKED whether I could do some deliveries in the car, and they decided to cancel my insurance!)

So we sat up till midnight waiting for the call, both of us had work in the morning so gave up then. I eventually got a call at 4.30 am, which of course I missed. So the following morning, I actually felt a little better, but the pain and itching in my ears was extreme. I attempted to phone the GP, the recorded message informed me I could hold, or make an appointment in person. The surgery is roughly on the way to work, so that seemed the better option. I went in, to be told that no I couldn't make an appointment in person, I should go and phone. I tried to phone from outside, where it said I was number 45 in the queue, but they could call me back.

They inevitably called me back when I was driving, and when I phoned again all appointments were gone. The following day I tried again. Work can in theory be a little flexible, they don't mind me picking up the parcels an hour late, but of course if I do so I need to work late. And of course the later I start, the further from my home town I'm likely to be at a time I might be offered an appointment. I've never had a day sick, and I accept it'll have to happen sometime, but I really can't afford to take a day off just to attempt to make an appointment, costing a day's wages and risking my job (self employed gig economy, they just give your round away). Again I missed the call back while driving.

So I googled the antibiotic ear drops I'd had a few years ago. I was surprised that I could buy them and pay 24 hour delivery. I purchased them, and nothing turned up. So I rang the chemist, who said there was a hold on my order because of a tech issue which hadn't confirmed my email. She sorted it out on the phone, and sent me an email so I could confirm details. It didn't arrive again. I phoned again to be told there was a note on my file that they were out of stock, would I accept a different brand? Yes, of course I will, why haven't you emailed/texted/called? What use is a note on a file I can't see?? I receive the eardrops 4 days late, my ears are agony...

The eardrops work a treat, after a week all itching/pain/discharge has gone. But I still can't hear, and there's quite a bit of swelling in my neck and jaw which is uncomfortable. I still think I should see a doctor. This should be easier now because it's not urgent? I can just book an advance appointment I can get to? No apparently not, I've got to do the 8.30 call back thing, and hope that a) they don't phone when I'm driving and b) they can offer a late enough appointment that I won't be miles away and can get to it.

I just don't understand how I'm supposed to make this work.

OP posts:
PinkLemonadee · 24/02/2026 17:34

RhaenysRocks · 24/02/2026 13:57

For those saying 'go about your day while in the queue.'.plenty of jobs where you cannot do that. Would you be ok with your child's teacher doing that? The person on the checkout.

From what the op has said it won't be an issue for them. They could make the call while driving to their job

whatsgoingoninmybrain · 24/02/2026 18:20

Abd80 · 24/02/2026 17:29

So I set my alarm to when the NHS GP surgery phones open at 08:30 am
and I have their number on speed dial so I get straight through.
I get placed in the queue, and I just put my phone on speakerphone and go about my business as usual until someone answers.
If I’m booked I for a callback I just keep my phone with me all day. I have my car set up so my calls come through on the speakers when I’m driving. It’s not that hard.
it’s a small price to pay for primary care that is free at the point of delivery

if you’re in the surgery in person though surely they can add you to the call back list without you having to phone again ? Or offer you a non-urgent appointment ? Or direct you to the online GP consultations ?

Edited

Personally I’d love to sit in the office with my phone on speakerphone, but it’s just not possible.

RhaenysRocks · 24/02/2026 19:26

PinkLemonadee · 24/02/2026 17:34

From what the op has said it won't be an issue for them. They could make the call while driving to their job

No she cant because her condition is causing her to be deaf!

Thechaseison71 · 24/02/2026 20:26

popcornandpotatoes · 24/02/2026 13:33

The thing is the GP has already tried phoning op back multiple times but she is either driving or sleeping (maybe a car with Bluetooth would be an idea in future) I'm not sure what the solution is other than you take some time off work. The GP can't work to your schedule

Well if they phone at 4.30am you would expect the OP to be sleeping.

Tootiredcantsleep · 24/02/2026 22:26

Thechaseison71 · 24/02/2026 20:26

Well if they phone at 4.30am you would expect the OP to be sleeping.

It was an out of hours service. They typically operate out of hours.

Thechaseison71 · 24/02/2026 23:14

Tootiredcantsleep · 24/02/2026 22:26

It was an out of hours service. They typically operate out of hours.

Edited

Shed phoned them TEN hours earlier. In early evening In what world is it reasonable to have to stay awake all bloody night waiting for a call.

Tootiredcantsleep · 24/02/2026 23:24

Thechaseison71 · 24/02/2026 23:14

Shed phoned them TEN hours earlier. In early evening In what world is it reasonable to have to stay awake all bloody night waiting for a call.

Thankfully phones have ringtones so she didn't need to. And yes she slept through it because of her hearing, but I'm not sure why her boyfriend didn't answer.

Midsommermadness · 25/02/2026 00:39

I’m afraid you will need to book a day off and call in the morning. Ridiculous set up for someone working full time.

Ooihuko · 25/02/2026 03:48

Thechaseison71 · 24/02/2026 20:26

Well if they phone at 4.30am you would expect the OP to be sleeping.

They aren't calling at 4.3pam!

endofthelinefinally · 25/02/2026 04:10

Can you write an old fashioned letter to the practice manager, detailing what you have said in your op and emphasising the pain, swelling and hearing loss?
Point out that you can nether hear nor answer the phone and please would they text you?
I find bullet points help to make things clear.
Send it recorded delivery and keep a copy.
First rule in the nhs is that if it isn't written down it didn't happen. So written request will usually get a response, phone calls not so much.

endofthelinefinally · 25/02/2026 04:18

Ooihuko · 25/02/2026 03:48

They aren't calling at 4.3pam!

Op states that they called at 4.30 am.

Wtfdoidoplease · 25/02/2026 04:31

Go in, say you can’t hear to use the phone, cry if you have to. All you need to do is push a bit. Ask to see the practice manager if they say no. If you can’t hear you can’t sit on hold and they are discriminating against you by not giving you an appointment.

In fairness to them you did miss at least three calls so I wouldn’t say they are all in the wrong here. Your comments about benefits are also shitty.

Hope you get it sorted.

nevernotmaybe · 25/02/2026 05:12

Sick leave is a thing, you are expected to be able to use this, and wait for calls etc. You have 7 days where you don't need an official note.

AprilinPortugal · 25/02/2026 05:40

I work for a department at the local hospital that specialises in a long term condition, and we often get our patients calling our helpline about issues not related to the condition they are under us for, for exactly this reason...they can't get through to their GP. I often email their GP to ask them to review the patient and it sometimes works! I sometimes will phone the patient anyway as I can see their bloods are not right. Sorry that doesn't help you I know, but it is definitely becoming more common now. I think yes, go to A&E, I know it's not what it's for but I can see why a lot of our patients do this!

Evergreen21 · 25/02/2026 05:45

The phoning on the day system is poor. I second what another poster said in that if you drive for a living then you need some kind of handsfree/ Bluetooth set up so you can answer calls in the car.

In my area I would have been able to do an e consult for this but again it's on the day at 7am and it does close by midday. If it was outwith that I would have rung 111 and then after a call back likely been referred on to minor injuries treatment clinic or A &E.

Evergreen21 · 25/02/2026 05:47

@nevernotmaybe the op has already said they are self employed. Not all of us can take a day off just to attempt to make an appointment.

TheChickenOrTheMiniEgg · 25/02/2026 05:56

Simonjt · 23/02/2026 18:32

So you know how to get an appointment at your GP surgery, you just dislike having to do it because it won’t be perfectly convenient.

No Simon, that was the point of her OP. Read it again, more slowly this time.

Shitstix · 25/02/2026 06:01

I don't understand why British people put up with such a ridiculous system. I know you're all (rightfully) scared of a US style medical system, but there is an in-between.

In Australia I go to a bulk-billed GP (dont pay at point of use but pay through income tax) and I can choose where to go. If I need to see a specialist they cost money, but you get a good amount back from Medicare and more flexibility over where/when you see the specialist.

I've lived for 10 years in the UK and can't say I thought the NHS was that great.

Hope you got your appointment OP and are fully on the mend.

Fatcat12345 · 25/02/2026 06:22

Hi op, how is your hearing? I have exactly the same problem at the moment and it did get a little bit better, but seem to have stayed the same for 5 days now, have about 60% hearing in one ear and 20% in the other, been to the GP twice and saw the nurse practitioner both times and was told that it is my eustacian tubes that is filled with fluid. Was given Otrivine blocked nose treatment although my nose isnt blocked anymore, so i have to just ride it out.

I am giving it till next week when I have a private ENT appointment for a unrelated issue and will ask him if he wouldn't mind having a look. It is really scary and depressing, it feels like this is my life now, so I feel for you. Try the Otrivine and see if it helps

RhaenysRocks · 25/02/2026 06:45

Ooihuko · 25/02/2026 03:48

They aren't calling at 4.3pam!

Yes they did.

TwelvePiecesOfFlair · 25/02/2026 09:31

RhaenysRocks · 23/02/2026 22:07

I think what is clear is that no two surgeries run the same way and as with many things, simply do not gel with the reality of modern life. I'm a teacher. I cannot sit on a phone queue at 8.30. I cannot pick up my phone at whatever random time they decide to call me. I cannot take a day off, incurring cover for my colleagues when I'm not actually ill, but have a potential concern to discuss. They wonder why people are clogging up A&E..this is why.

This!! I tried to explain this to my practice manager. She replied telling me the patients like the new system… completely ignoring all the patients who never get through and never actually get an appointment!
If you are a driver, a teacher, a retail worker, a theatre nurse, etc etc it’s a massive obstacle.
I can’t actually believe people are suggesting OP should have taken a day off to make an appointment!
We pay massive amounts of tax for the health service and cant even access basic care.

blackcatlove · 25/02/2026 09:39

@SEmyarse sounds like you might have some ETD due to an ear infection. Look up exercises online and they can help with that.

111 cannot help with routine appointments and some areas cannot book GP appointments either.

Email the practice manager stating you’ve been trying and would like a routine appointment to discuss your thyroid.

blackcatlove · 25/02/2026 09:40

Oh and if you do fill in an online form, put the times you are available and you could also do this for 111. It makes it easier to get hold of you. We call 3 times and then it’s ended. If you put a time it can help avoid you missing these calls.

blackcatlove · 25/02/2026 09:42

Fatcat12345 · 25/02/2026 06:22

Hi op, how is your hearing? I have exactly the same problem at the moment and it did get a little bit better, but seem to have stayed the same for 5 days now, have about 60% hearing in one ear and 20% in the other, been to the GP twice and saw the nurse practitioner both times and was told that it is my eustacian tubes that is filled with fluid. Was given Otrivine blocked nose treatment although my nose isnt blocked anymore, so i have to just ride it out.

I am giving it till next week when I have a private ENT appointment for a unrelated issue and will ask him if he wouldn't mind having a look. It is really scary and depressing, it feels like this is my life now, so I feel for you. Try the Otrivine and see if it helps

Google ETD exercises, you need to do these as well. It can take up to 6 months or longer for this to fully resolve in some cases.

rainbowsandraspberrygin · 25/02/2026 20:43

blackcatlove · 25/02/2026 09:40

Oh and if you do fill in an online form, put the times you are available and you could also do this for 111. It makes it easier to get hold of you. We call 3 times and then it’s ended. If you put a time it can help avoid you missing these calls.

That’s a helpful tip. Thank you

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