To have said this to my cleaner?

[wellwatnow]

NC for this. I've had this last cleaner for almost a year, I've had several over the years and although this one isn't all that great she's one of the best at cleaning and I will say is by far the most reliable. She comes every other Monday and sometimes I have to text her on a Sunday afternoon to tell her I won't be in as she has to use the key safe (usually I am home).

I wasn't home last time she came, and I won't be home tomorrow either. As always I thanked her for doing a good job, she's always said I must let her know if anything is missed out with her cleaning, so I asked her if she could make sure my laundry room gets a good clean as she forgot to do it last time.

Anyway, a while later she replied and said no problem, sorry if you thought the laundry room hadn't been cleaned, she said she had cleaned it but would give it a good clean. I replied to thank her and said I'd noticed that one of the wall cupboard doors had definitely not been cleaned which made me think she'd forgotten the room. Well she replied quite quickly by saying she knows which door I mean, and that she hadn't cleaned it because it looked like it was covered in dried cat sick (my cat often sleeps on the top of the wall cupboards in the laundry room) and that she didn't want to clean it, and that I must have known about it because otherwise how did I know it hadn't happened after she left? She said she left it as she didn't want to clean it up and thought it could be the thing we never spoke about, whatever that means. She then said she can't make tomorrow but would be in touch when she's free.

I suspect now that she won't be coming back, which is infuriating as it's impossible to get people to clean, all my friends that have cleaners tell me they are too busy and won't give me their numbers. I only found this one as she was cleaning for a neighbour one day. I had to wait ages for her to find a space to fit me in. But I can't help think she's taking this way too personally.

Yes. It shows that the OP lacks tact. I think she needs to improve her communication skills.

Why wasn’t this the first post. So obvious to me to assume she’d just run out of time. Especially, as she is cleaning only forthrightly.

And for her to decide to walk away after a text, may be she doesn’t think you (and the job you have for her) is all that great either.

So how is she not that great then?

Totally agree. It's fine to be someone who is a bit direct, even blunt, but not lacking compassion.

Some people are also close to their cleaners - there could have been a friendship there and it would have pressed on a sore point to say the equivalent of: "Your friend is dead - can I have her place?"

I say some people are close to their cleaners... I've not had much experience, but the lovely Bernie who cleaned our halls at university was such a gem. When I accidentally died my hair GREEN and BLUE the day before my 20th birthday she was the one saying: "Oh what on earth have you done to yourself?!" and made me try and wash it out with Fairy Liquid over the kitchen sink! Fabulous lady - when I was hiccuping through tears - who said: "Well it will still be your birthday regardless and you'll have a tale to tell in years to come won't you?!" She's right, I'm 47 on Thursday and I still think back to that day!

She’s one of the best at cleaning and by far the most reliable and yet you still say she ‘isn’t all that great’.

The cat sick request was probably the straw that broke the camel’s back. Sounds like she can’t do right no matter what.

She doesn't always clean things that I have mentioned to her need cleaning, she will come back to me and say these things are done on rotation and will then either do it that day or sometimes I have to wait for her to get round to it. She is also incredibly bossy which I don't like, for example she insists on charging me for coming to the house to clean and it's a set price (set by her) but she won't ever tell me how many hours I am going to get. If I say anything she will tell me "well I'm a professional cleaner and this is my business".

I replied to thank her and said I'd noticed that one of the wall cupboard doors had definitely not been cleaned which made me think she'd forgotten the room.

You clearly did expect her to clean up your cat sick because that was what made you think the room hadn't been cleaned. By not coming back she's telling you that won't tolerate being criticised for not cleaning up your cats sick.

...although this one isn't all that great she's one of the best at cleaning and I will say is by far the most reliable.

She's one of the best at cleanin AND she's reliable, what else do you want from a cleaner.

I think you may have to accept your expectations are too high and you would be better off cleaning your own house. Leaving dried cat sick on a cupboard door suggests your standards are only high when someone else is cleaning up your mess.

You pay for a clean house though, not for X hours of cleaning, surely? I'm team cleaner here. And the dead client freeing up a slot thing, not nice.

I’ve had the same cleaner for 9 years - wouldn’t dream of asking her to clean up anything related to my dog. We furloughed her during Covid. I consider her a friend; she’s looked after me when I fell over and gave me flowers when my dad died.
Its not a fun job - think how you’d like to be treated if you were a cleaner.

This is what she keeps telling me, that I pay for the experience, as she calls it. I asked when I first met her what her hourly rate was but she said she would need to see my house and would charge for what I wanted doing. The price includes the cost of all the cleaning things and equipment, though she has asked to use my vacuum cleaner as it is one that she likes. But I would much rather know how long she was going to be here and charge for each hour as sometimes I think she is rushing.

if she charges a flat rate per job, then she won’t be telling you how many hours you get.
and there will be some jobs that are routine and done every time and some that are considered more deep cleaning and done as and when time allows.

expecting someone to clear up your cat’s sick is grim and it is even grimmer that you left it for her.

Cleaner has quite rightly binned you.

I can’t beleive you texted her after the neighbour died to secure her

you know the sick was there. You should had texted her and said sorry just seen it - don’t have time to wash it but leave it and I will do when I am back

or do you think cleaners should clear up anything whether wee poo sick

Fairly normsl to pay for day 2 hours in my area (flats) and they focus on bathroom kitchen then whatever else can be done in the time.

Yes, I have only ever paid cleaners by the hour.

The question now is do you want her to keep cleaning for you enough that you are prepared to message her and offer a fulsome apology for being rude? The trouble with text is that there is no tone of voice and, while you felt you were just offering an explanation for why you thought the room had been missed, she clearly read it as both a criticism of her cleaning and a statement that you felt clearing up cat sick was part of her role.
She feels insulted and if you want her to come back you need to apologise, explain that you expressed yourself badly, emphasise that you do not think cleaning cat sick is her job, stress how much you value her and her work and cross your fingers.
It sounds as though she can easily replace you and you cannot immediately replace her at all.

Cat sick and bat sick and dried monkey do-do,
Blackest of magic and darkest of voodoo,
Cleaners that clean all the dry crap that clings,
These are a few of my favourite things.

Are you for real? She was reliable and a good cleaner, but apparently still lacking somehow? Serves you right-slavery was abolished some time ago you know

one of the wall cupboard doors had definitely not been cleaned which made me think she'd forgotten the room

You thought she’d forgotten to clean a room because one of the wall cupboard doors had cat sick on it? No wonder she’s not coming back.

all my friends that have cleaners tell me they are too busy and won't give me their numbers

I wonder why they won’t give you the numbers? 🤔. There’s lots of cleaning companies out there who employ cleaners, why not use one of them?

We’ve had the same wonderful lady for 11 years who comes 3 times a week, I would never mention if she’s missed cleaning ONE cupboard door nor would I expect her to clean animal vomit up, that’s unreasonable. If you mange to find someone else reconsider what you say and how you say it. You sound a nightmare to work for.

When the cat barfs
And the cleaner laughs
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember that Zoflora exists
And then I don't feel soooooooo bad.

Honestly I wouldn't make a thing over something being missed once (if I thought it had been missed as opposed to being a grotbag leaving my pet's vomit for someone else to clean up).

You just lost yourself a really good cleaner - someone who takes pride in her work and actually gives a shit about providing a decent service. I would send an extremely grovelling response, or marigold up.

"Not the best" but "best at cleaning" and "reliable"

Hmmm

Also leaving your cats vom to clean up in gross, its akin to me leaving my dogs crap for the cleaner. It just would never happen.

Also - where are you based? Sounds like an extremely good cleaner has a slot available, and I'm keen.