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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for reasons NOT to get a dog?

242 replies

Waheymum · 21/02/2026 05:33

I'm pregnant with my & DH's second child, first is a toddler. DH desperately wants a dog. I'm left with almost all childcare because he works irregular hours, and this wouldn't change if he had a dog so I'd be left looking after two children and a dog. I take DC1 out to groups/soft play/etc most days so it's not like I'm sitting around at home to look after a dog. On top of this, I just don't want one: I'm not ready to commit to a dog, they're a lot of work, I couldn't just take a dog out with my DCs to kids' activities.

AIBU not to want a dog at this time, and could you relay some experiences/stories that explain why it's a bad idea?

OP posts:
TheGrimSmile · 21/02/2026 09:31

Even if you really, really want a dog, it's hard having a dog. Your life changes. You cant go anywhere without planning and often end up not doing things because if the dog. Do NOT get a dog in your circumstances.

Merseymum1980 · 21/02/2026 09:38

Im.currently looking after a relatives dog whilst they are on holiday. I love dogs but its made me realise il never have one.
Walks aee hard to fit, makes work difficult,hair everywhere, never smell clean no mattter how much bathing.
Vet bills are horrendous etc etc
Very selish of your dh to want this at the momemt

Snaletrale · 21/02/2026 09:39

They are hard work and a bind, especially if you can’t afford to put them into doggy daycare.

We put off having one for years for those reasons. We have one now we have a bit more disposable cash, and she’s lovely but I do get fed up of all the walking and not being able to leave her for more than 4 hours, unless I arrange and drop her off to doggy daycare - if they can fit her in.

I definitely wouldn’t agree to it in your position - even if he was doing half the work, which he obviously won’t. They are expensive. Insurance is horrific, doesn’t always cover everything, and food isn’t cheap, before you even begin to think about doggy daycare.

It’s really like having another small child being totally reliant on you. I wouldn’t have another one, despite loving her immensely. Too much commitment and bind, to be a good dog owner, and not fair on them if you can’t be a good one.

Merseymum1980 · 21/02/2026 09:41

ToriMounj · 21/02/2026 05:51

You’ll end up doing everything. Tell him to get fucked.

Like this response ha ha

Womaninhouse17 · 21/02/2026 10:04

Less than 5 hours since the initial post and 6 pages of almost entirely reasons for not getting a dog. I hope OP is taking note!

MandingoAteMyBaby · 21/02/2026 10:11

Here are the main pleasures of owning a dog:

  • Grabbing a still-warm shit to spoil a lovely walk
  • Watching the dog eat another dog’s shit then vomit it up on your rug then eat some of it again
  • Ball licking show
  • Having to stand there shrieking uselessly at the dog while it jumps up and annoys people and frightens their children, while calming them down by telling them he’s friendly
  • Jaw dropping vet bills to deal with its parasites and other grimness
  • Watching it claw through your plaster walls
  • Every time someone comes to the door all hell breaks loose
  • Being known as the person who drags an animal around the village allowing it to spray doses of foul piss on public infrastructure
  • Having less choice and flexibility about holidays because you have the fur-millstone to consider
  • The ludicrous cost of feeding the damn thing
  • Hair and smell all over your house.
  • Having to post on your local facebook page every time it runs off
  • If you die suddenly alone at home, the knowledge that within 4 hours it will be tucking in to your face
CruCru · 21/02/2026 10:22

Honestly? Getting a dog is a bit like moving the family to Australia - it can’t happen unless you want to as well.

ScarlettOYara · 21/02/2026 10:24

Your husband is the reason many dog owners get a bad name - he wants a dog, but it'll be you that does all the work, OP.
I think enough reasons have been given. A dog lover doesn't want to bring a pet into this situation.

Coffeeisnecessary · 21/02/2026 10:27

I've found having a dog one of the most stressful things I've ever done. I love her and she is well cared for but she is exhausting and is still going strong 11years on, the early years with young children was the hardest, the smell. The hair, the poo,everything. She didn't chew much which was good but I find the lack of flexibility with plans a pain. I will never get another! I think you have given very solid good reasons not to.

NotSmallButFunSize · 21/02/2026 10:31

You don't want one - end of list!

SoSadSoSadSoSad · 21/02/2026 10:35

MandingoAteMyBaby · 21/02/2026 10:11

Here are the main pleasures of owning a dog:

  • Grabbing a still-warm shit to spoil a lovely walk
  • Watching the dog eat another dog’s shit then vomit it up on your rug then eat some of it again
  • Ball licking show
  • Having to stand there shrieking uselessly at the dog while it jumps up and annoys people and frightens their children, while calming them down by telling them he’s friendly
  • Jaw dropping vet bills to deal with its parasites and other grimness
  • Watching it claw through your plaster walls
  • Every time someone comes to the door all hell breaks loose
  • Being known as the person who drags an animal around the village allowing it to spray doses of foul piss on public infrastructure
  • Having less choice and flexibility about holidays because you have the fur-millstone to consider
  • The ludicrous cost of feeding the damn thing
  • Hair and smell all over your house.
  • Having to post on your local facebook page every time it runs off
  • If you die suddenly alone at home, the knowledge that within 4 hours it will be tucking in to your face

I really wish I had read this before being lumbered with dogs.

Munchyseeds2 · 21/02/2026 10:38

The fact that you don't want a dog at this time in your life IS enough of a reason

Silverbirchleaf · 21/02/2026 10:45

A dog is not a fluffy toy. It’s a live being with its own needs, demands and routines. Basically you’d be bringing another baby/toddler into the mix, on top of your current situation.

Wait at least five years before considering it again.

FreeWheezin · 21/02/2026 10:45

They eat poo. Including baby nappies if they can get to it. They get upset tummies because of this, and that is hard to clean up.

The roll in poo and all kinds of things. With small DC you dont want to be introducing any more mess to the house than you can physically keep up with cleaning.

Puppies are like babies. They require so much attention, and toilet training. That is a lot to take on with small DC.

They need to be walked once or twice a day, and the length of the walk depends on the energy of the dog. Who will be taking up to two hours out of the day to do this? How will this impact child care? Trying to walk a dog solo while wrangling two small DC can a nightmare, but if you dont walk it then your DH will be exempting himself from any child or house care for two hours a day.

Every holiday either needs to be planned to include the dog which means mostly UK breaks, or doubles in price because you now have to pay for dog sitter or kennels.

As they get older they cost a lot in vet care. Either you pay monthly for really good insurance, or keep a couple of thousand pounds in savings in case of treatment. My elderly dog is currently on prescription painkillers and prescription gut medicine, and will be until the end now.

Ablondiebutagoody · 21/02/2026 10:46

Because they are antisocial

S0j0urn4r · 21/02/2026 10:46

Not wanting one is reason enough. Dogs can be challenging at times so you should really want one to start with.
It sounds like you don't have the time to devote to care, training and exercise - so that's another reason.
Then there's the cost of pet insurance, food etc. What would happen if you went on holiday? Cost of petsitter?
There are too many dogs in rescue centres due to being bought by idiots who then found they didn't have the time or resources to cope.
The best interests of the dog must always come first.
Maybe get your partner one of those realistic toy dogs?

HoppityBun · 21/02/2026 10:50

Silverbirchleaf · 21/02/2026 10:45

A dog is not a fluffy toy. It’s a live being with its own needs, demands and routines. Basically you’d be bringing another baby/toddler into the mix, on top of your current situation.

Wait at least five years before considering it again.

Absolutely OP. You don’t need anecdotes at this time, you need a clear head. Think about what you can offer a dog, as well as your new baby.

IsSheorIsntShe · 21/02/2026 11:02

DH desperately wants a dog.

It wouldn't be DH's dog. He's not there enough.

My DH finally got the dog he'd always wanted when our kids were teens. But he wasn't there nearly as much as I was, and the dog decided she was mine.

FarmGirl78 · 21/02/2026 11:06

You have to walk them even if it's cold and raining.

The condition your dog gets will be the one not covered by the vet bill insurance policy.

Your house will smell and even the friends who promised faithfully to let you know if it does start to smell, will keep quiet.

However much you love dogs, life is too short to be unblocking anal glands.

Laiste · 21/02/2026 11:11

Because you don't want one.

Thats all that matters.

Having a dog is a family decision and everyone should be in board. Same as having a child!

Purplecatshopaholic · 21/02/2026 11:15

You don’t need to justify it op. You dont want a dog is enough - you would have most of the work and you don’t want it. You’d basically have three kids, not two. End of discussion really. (I have dogs and adore them, but I don’t have young children). When your DH can share the load (in reality, not empty promises!) maybe rethink.

Laiste · 21/02/2026 11:16

MandingoAteMyBaby · 21/02/2026 10:11

Here are the main pleasures of owning a dog:

  • Grabbing a still-warm shit to spoil a lovely walk
  • Watching the dog eat another dog’s shit then vomit it up on your rug then eat some of it again
  • Ball licking show
  • Having to stand there shrieking uselessly at the dog while it jumps up and annoys people and frightens their children, while calming them down by telling them he’s friendly
  • Jaw dropping vet bills to deal with its parasites and other grimness
  • Watching it claw through your plaster walls
  • Every time someone comes to the door all hell breaks loose
  • Being known as the person who drags an animal around the village allowing it to spray doses of foul piss on public infrastructure
  • Having less choice and flexibility about holidays because you have the fur-millstone to consider
  • The ludicrous cost of feeding the damn thing
  • Hair and smell all over your house.
  • Having to post on your local facebook page every time it runs off
  • If you die suddenly alone at home, the knowledge that within 4 hours it will be tucking in to your face

This made me chuckle.

I owned dogs when i first left home. I had a couple of great danes and a toy breed. I loved them and i have great memories and they had a good life with me. But it's cats all the way for me these days because everyone with dogs has experienced at least 2 or 3 things on that list 🤣

Appleblum · 21/02/2026 11:17

Don't. A puppy is very very hard work and I honestly found it so much harder than a baby. You would be crazy to take on a puppy with a newborn on the way!

C152 · 21/02/2026 11:24

The very start of your post tells you why you shouldn't get a dog: you have a toddler, will soon have a newborn, your DH is the only one who wants a dog, yet he won't be looking after it. It's very obvious you shouldn't have a dog. Suggest DH gets his pet fix via Borrow My Doggy or something similar.

HoskinsChoice · 21/02/2026 11:28

Twooclockrock · 21/02/2026 08:49

How rude. She is most definitely not thick😂 and bad owned labs all her life. This one was a bit bitey and she didnt want to risk it.

Show quote history

All puppies are a 'bit bitey'. She isn’t just stupid, she's cruel for bringing a dog into a home with toddlers and then getting rid of it because it's a 'bit bitey'. It is her responsibility to train a puppy and to keep both the dog and the children safe. It makes me so angry that people think nothing of fucking up a dog's life like this. She's stupid, cruel and irresponsible and I really hope she has not got another one.