To have walked out of Wuthering Heights

[Beardycapri]

But not for the reasons you think.

I had wind.

Bad wind.

it was squeaky. People turned round. My date was not impressed. Curse you, kale and lentils. Curse you.

Smothering shites 😀 🚶 💨

Not that light if @Beardycapri had to leave the film showing?

Heathcliff,
It's me, I'm windy,
I've just blown now,

Can't ho-o-o-old it,
Let me open a windo-o-o-ow.

I let out the smelliest fart with my first ever boyfriend when we'd only been together a few weeks. Fortunately we were in a crowded place and i dont think he knew it was me. I can still see his wrinkled up nose all these yesrs later. Thundering tart.

Two and a half hours is a long time to hold it.

Tell your date you couldn’t take the literary and historic inaccuracies, Brontë must be spinning in her grave blah blah. And the final straw was someone next to you kept squeaky kale farting….

Kale and lentils. You hated them but loved them too?

I hope it does not stop a second date if that was the first.

Very funny! 😄

First date.
Office colleagues.
Monday will be awkward.

It will be a breeze.

Subtle, understated and very funny. Perfect 😂

Heathwhiff, it's me, I'm Gassy,
I've gone home.

Hahahaha I do this too. I warn my partner now on the days I wanna splurge on food that he can come round but needs a gas mask

“It’s me, Fartee, let me outa your wind ho-ho-ho-hole!”

😂😂

That explains things. We thought the nearby Grand Union canal was a bit ripe earlier (we're in Northants). It was YOU!

Kale is delicious- especially when crispy!

The Independent gave it 1 star and one of the women at work who saw it when it came out said despite all the hype it was shite.

I did wonder why they were doing so much publicity. The last movie I noticed that had that much publicity was Babygirl, and that was crap too.

Sorry about your unruly innards, OP.
I was at the cinema today and saw the trailer of WH.
It looked awful, trash.
Avoid.

I had read the other puns, and was working on my own but I can stop trying now. I knew there was one great one floating out there, and you cracked it for all of us! 🤗

@NotMeAtAll
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💨💨💨💨💨

Wuthering Shite - the film and your date OP.

ok?

Sorry

A wise decision as it could have developed into Wuthering Shites.