To ban cooking for teenage boys

[Boysfood]

I have 3 teen ds 15,17 and 19.

They cook all the time. Breakfast lunch , I make dinner they then cook in evenings and when getting home. My electric bill is too high.

I’ve asked them to have cereal or toast or instant porridge etc for breakfast. Sandwiches etc for lunch and snacks to be something that doesn’t need cooking. We always have these type of things available but they ignore me and start cooking. I can’t remove the oven etc and they often do this when I’m out or in bed. Only 19 year old works so I can charge him more rent to cover his share but others still in education and I don’t know what to do .

When I had my DC I didn't expect to be a single parent who's ex has managed to avoid paying CM for 12 years. I didnt expect to have a mental breakdown leaving me too unwell to work, but not unwell enough to get any extra help. I didn't expect there to be a cost of living crisis.

Many many things have changed since I had DCs I could afford. I expect it's the same for OP.

Precisely.

Or are the rest of the world's mothers in possession of the gift of prescience and can be 100% sure that their circumstances will never change? Pity that we "UK mothers" didnt get that gift too!

No one gets married expecting to divorce. No one has children expecting one or all of them to be affected by disability. No one crosses the road expecting to be hit by a car.

Things change and the most carefully made plans can be blown apart very easily. An affair, an illness, a job loss....and suddenly that which was easy is now so so hard.

Be grateful for your continuing good fortune @Mayana1 and spare a thought for those of us to whom life has not been so kind.

I think your problem is that you have more kids than you can afford. I would have stopped at one or two. As a parent, you have a responsibility to feed, clothe and house them. And yes, teenage boys eat a lot. That’s the way it is. Once the younger two hit 18, you can start charging them too, as you are with the 19 year old. That should help with the electricity bill.

It's not healthy, it's junk, just hot.

I'm not in the UK, and I'd absolutely charge rent to an adult living in my home. You can only baby them so much, at some point you have to expect them to be real, grown-up boys. That's your job as a parent.

Get a prepay meter- then when they cook a lot they won't have light or be able to recharge devices or watch TV later- they are not listening to you, but a meter they have to charge will make the point.

Nor will Op though. They will use all the money on the meter and she will have no power either.

@IDontSweatEver

so you should only ever have kids if you’re prepared to spend all your income on shitty processed meats for them to cook, food outside of meals that they don’t even need?! Yeah, no.

What do you suggest then? That she puts them back?!

As I said before, I am sure that when they were born affording three kids was perfectly fine but things changed. Marriages ending is known to have a detrimental effect on finances and this is her reality.

Being Captain Hindsight is hardly helpful is it?

Yes they will use all the power- then they will have no power- that's the point.
Do you have a better solution, if not then I'm afraid the OP will have a little inconvenience- if she puts money on the meter, she is there -so she can stop them cooking, or cook herself.
The OP's main problem is that the teens are using far too much electricity while she isn't there- this solves that.

Yes, cooking at home is better than ordering takeaways.

Entitled? The kids are buying their own food and cooking supplies, with their own money. She's just being controlling, and not recognizing they need much more food than she is providing. That isn't being entitled. That's being HUNGRY.

The eldest IS paying her rent.

Skinny fat is caused people eating the right amount of calories but all the wrong foods and doing insufficient exercise, not people eating too much. If you consistently eat more calories than your body can metabolise against your activity level, you will be fat fat.

That's not enough for the metabolism of a teenage boy. They need more food. They're cooking their own food, that they help pay for. The eldest pays rent, and she's stealing money from younger ones for her alleged raised electricity bills. She complained about the mess, so they bought their own baking trays and things. This is all about control, and her not caring that they are HUNGRY.

No way are they hungry on what they eat!

@BeAvidHiker

But OP is offering them plenty of healthy meal/snack options, they’re just not hot ones. It’s not that the lads have to cook a load of sausages or get a takeaway.

NO ONE needs to be cooking an hour after a meal. NO ONE. Don’t care what their age or sex is. It’s just not necessary

Yeah. So as many said, that quite suggests the meal is not sufficient at all....

@Notthepope

Based on OP’s description of what she cooks, it does sound sufficient though

Maybe they want to eat hot food? Why is this such an unreasonable want? Why do they have to eat what the OP wants them to eat? The OP doesn’t want them cooking food like pasta because of the electricity cost. That’s the crux of the matter. Why isn’t the money she’s charging the older one, and the money she’s taking from the younger ones’ allowances sufficient to cover this cost? That’s my question.

@IDontSweatEver

because she’s already made a hot dinner for everyone earlier that evening!

Why can’t they have more than one hot meal?

@IDontSweatEver

I dunno…double dinners! Just seems a bit greedy

Not necessary

Or maybe the food that they’re being given during dinner isn’t sufficient, and they’re hungry? Maybe they’re really active. Maybe they play sport regularly? Maybe they’re going through a growth spurt? The issue that the OP seems to have is the cost of electricity.