To find it enraging that my husband goes to the toilet for five minutes without fail every time dinner is ready

[Designless]

Why the fuck can't he go during the hour before dinner inevitably being ready instead of making everyone wait imaging him sitting on the shitter?

If I ever express annoyance he whines really annoyingly.

God it feels good to let this out.

Tell him it’s ready 5 mins before it is 🤷‍♀️

I still then need to imagine him defecating immediately before I eat

Who needs to fucking one in one out in this way

I give a 10 minute warning of when l will be dishing up. If they dawdle their dinner goes cold. That is all. 🤷‍♂️

I certainly wouldn’t be waiting for him!
Is he not embarrassed?

Does he do the same when he cooks?

I love my DH dearly but he does this too and it infuriates me!

I could not wait but knowing where he is is still disgusting

My DH and adult son both do this. Its bloody annoying

Yeah same I complained just now and he's being all wounded about it

We have ADHD children who eat super fast and then get bored. Dinner is over and plates are away after 5 mins so he would just miss out here.

My husband is obsessed with going to the toilet. When he hears me get up in the morning he rushes into the bathroom. For the 10th time. I feel your pain.

Men and toileting is a known odd thing. I took to telling DH that it was "time" before a meal or going out. No adult wants to tell another adult this, but to be fair he checks I have my lunches for work or a suitable coat, and he has since learned - I think because no adult wants to be told to go to the toilet!

What is the DEAL WITH IT IT'S SO WEIRD

I feel your pain! 😬 For the last 2-3 years, DH has developed this awful habit of going for a shit, about 5 minutes before I dish up our evening meal. (He does it on maybe 3 days of any give week! Sometimes 4!)

And if I get up after him in a morning, I get my coffee and breakfast, and as I sit down to eat, he suddenly needs a shit. (Luckily I usually get up first, maybe 5 days a week...) I swear it's psychosomatic.... Him suddenly needing a shit! It's so annoying!

Thing is, our cottage is small, and sometimes the smell (of shit) wafts into the 'living area.' And the smell of the air freshener definitely does. I HATE the smell of this fucking pine air freshener that he sprays, because as soon as I smell it, I associate it with his shit! 😖 (Thankfully it doesn't ALWAYS waft into the living area! Maybe once or twice a week!)

I have even tried changing the time of our evening meal - having it 45 minutes later, but he STILL doesn't go for a shit until 5 minutes before it's fucking ready!

.

About 10 minutes before a meal was ready, I used to "shout out" (clearly didn't shout in an angry way) "time to wash your hands before lunch/supper". Worked a treat.

My MIL does this. I sometimes wonder if it is a bit of a control thing or a way of getting attention?
I now give a 5 minute warning to everyone and go ahead with serving up whether they are all ready or not.

I'm not sure why you can't go ahead without DH.

You are making the situation all about him and we all know from toddlers that the best way to change bad behaviour is to not react and don't reward it with attention.
Just think that he has left the room, is not there, late home from work or whatever. It seems excessive and is not normal to imagine someone taking a shit and be unable to eat.

I am genuinely taking comfort from it not just being me

Just start eating without him.

Just get on with your grub ... definitely don't wait!
He will have to est his cold.

We are all full of shit, didn’t you realise that @Designless ?

Not the same, but I have bowel disease (Ulcerative Colitis).

Merely the thought of food could have me running for the toilet when in a flare. Perhaps knowing dinner is ready causes a similar physiological trigger? I agree with letting him know 5/10 mins early and just try not to visualise what he is doing.

Yes but we don't all need to spurt it out on the other side of the wall from where others are spooning spaghetti Bolognese into their mouths

Oh that was descriptive 😆

Why is your toilet so close to your kitchen?

But why do many MEN always have to go for a shit directly before a meal?