To think a meal should not be part of a Birthday Present?

[zaktha]

I recently turned 60. I like material gifts not experiences and my family know this.

For my 60th birthday present, DH got me a pair of earrings (c£200) and is paying for a slap up meal with him, me, and our adult dc (c£300).

AIBU to think the meal isn’t really a gift to me?

So weird, most people as they get older realise that life isn't all about material things and value spending time with loved ones.

Btw a meal out with your family isn't an "experience" 😂

Has to be the most insane thing I have read in a while

Why on earth does it matter? It's a nice gesture, something to enjoy, be happy.

It's a Sunday morning
Get a coffee go outside and stop patronising thread policing

I much prefer experiences like meals/day out/ theatre tickets to “stuff” URBU and very ungrateful

£200 earrings sounds lovely present

plus a meal with the people I love most

Ungrateful cabbage.

Are you always this spoiled?

This isn’t a real thread is it 🤣🤣🤣

You got earrings. That’s your gift. You’re also being taken out to dinner.

Are the earrings insufficient? Do you want more gifts?

How do you know that your adult children will attend your birthday dinner empty handed?

Totally reasonable.

He might like a nice pair of earrings, you never know.

You sound ungrateful OP

Is it Friday night already?

Also, ‘slap up meal’. Does anyone actually say that in real life?

You could pay your share of the meal if you don’t want it as a present.

I think this is one of the most miserable posts I’ve seen on here in a long time.

To have the opportunity of going out with your adult children is a blessing in itself - to have them all in one spot is something not possible for so many families nowadays. To know they want to celebrate is a close 2nd!

Stop being so blimmen miserly and count your blessings.

LTB! 😂

Seriously though, I genuinely hope (for the sake of your family if not yourself) that you reflect on these comments from strangers, who have no skin in the game, who think you are ungrateful. Have a word with yourself for goodness sake

To be fair, it’s one of the most ridiculous threads I’ve seen in a while and the OP sounds like she would do well to get some fresh air and perspective.

Interesting that, for you, at 60, 'stuff' usurps spending time with loved ones to mark big birthdays

I would definitely say you're an outlier on this one and sound very ungrateful.

What would you prefer:
Earrings + another present. No family get together

Earrings + another present. Family get together with no food

Earrings + another present. Family get together with food that someone (you or your DH) has to plan, buy, prep, serve and wash up - probably missing time with the family and the celebration

'Kinell!
Could take the whole family on holiday for £500.
Behave yourself OP, are you 10 years old?

The meal is definitely part of the present. If you don’t want to go tell him to cancel but you shouldn’t expect more gifts in addition to the meal just because you don’t class a meal as a gift. Your DH is still spending £500. I can’t imagine letting me DH spend that kind of money and then sulking because I don’t see it as a gift. I’d just be honest from the start and say please don’t waste your money on a meal id sooner have something else.

Depends on the family...

I think you're right

nailed it

You have a material gift - earrings worth £200!!! In my house a normal gift is about £100 for special birthdays so you’re already winning.

Then spending money on a meal for you and loved ones, £300?! It must be a nice meal, not a Nando’s or somewhere so you are winning there too.

So yes, you are being VVVVV unreasonable (and ungrateful). Hasn’t reaching 60 years on the planet made you feel grateful to get to spend time with family on your birthday?

@packratandproudis absolutely right. Sometimes a bit of thread policing is absolutely necessary. I just saw a kingfisher….