Explain to me why you offence is caused by saying things like 'mildly autistic' etc.

[Purpleturtle45]

If ASD is a spectrum why do people commonly disagree that you can be mildly autistic or severely autistic etc.

My daughter is diagnosed with ASD, however you wouldn't really know unless you knew her well. She goes to mainstream school and copes well with everyday life most of the time so to me I would say she is mildly autistic but I often see people getting ripped to shreds on here for using that term.

Genuinely wondering how 'spectrum' can literally be in the title of the condition but people disagree there can be different severities.

Even if the spectrum of disorders as stated above is medically correct I think it is beneficial for the public to use terms which indicate the impact of ASD on everyday living. Some people with ASD unfortunately may be non verbal and incapable of entering employment for example while some can with assistance, with this in mind I think it is legitimate to use the term 'mildly autistic' even if not medically correct.

A parallel would be cancer whereby stage 4 pancreatic cancer in reality would be a lot more serious that an early diagnosed BCC on skin. Both are cancers but the prognosis and care are very much different.

I think severity of conditions does need quantifying and will have to be done when coming to discussion like school SEND support funding. It may be that some children with milder forms of autism (educational perpective) will require less support and so on this respect defining condition severity may be necessary.

It’s interesting because people would look at me now and think I must have mild autism (Asperger’s diagnosed) because I am a successful, sociable, confident human who runs a business and outwardly is very competent. Even I can be fooled into thinking I’ve always been like this, but the reality is that I have built these skills over a lifetime of observing people, some impressive faking/acting, pushing myself to the absolute limit of my comfort zone, throwing myself into situations that scare the shit out of me, medication for severe depression and anxiety, self-harm, breakdowns etc
My parents were very much of the “this is the world and life is tough, you need to figure out a way to earn a living and survive in it”. Tough love I suppose.

I am so bloody proud of how far I’ve come, yet on the surface I probably still class myself as mildly autistic compared to some- those non-verbal, for instance. Though if you’d have met me 25 years ago, you may have disagreed with that.

It's surely both? Some people will have a barely perceptible diamond in that circle and others it will be enormous. So it is also on the spectrum of more or less autistic. Because some appear and function completely normal and some individuals clearly do not. Noticing this isn't hostility

Even this shows a scale though. A person with profound autism, who is non verbal and cannot live alone will have all parts nearer the edges, than a person in mainstream education with support. There are varying degrees of being autistic. Just like there are varying diagnoses of cancer. Yes anyone with cancer has cancer, but the treatment plan and outcomes will be very different. Same with autism. The diagnosis doesn't explain the need.

I totally agree with you op. My son has asd and I describe him as mild and don’t see why the hell not if autism comes in levels. Level 1, 2 or 3.
Therefore I would describe level 1 as mild and 3 as profound. Don’t see the issue. Our psychologist said to us he would of been diagnosed with Asperger but that changed and it’s all grouped into the autism spectrum now

I fully agree. The people with the most severe autism are mostly invisible in society - they're not in mainstream schools or holding down jobs. Their voices aren't heard even though they are the ones most in need of support.

I agree with OP - Yes its a spectrum/colour wheel... whatever. BUT I would describe my son as mildy autistic. I cant imagine why anyone would find that offensive and nor do I actually care if anyone does - because its not for them to decide how we describe/define his experience.

I use it to describe his character to someone who doesnt know him. Just saying "my son has Autism" often conjures up visons of kids in ear defenders, meltdowns, no eye contact, non-verbal, obsessions with certain topics etc... or people are at least curious as to whether this is your reality or not. Which it isnt. Like OP said, id you didnt know him - you wouldn't know.

One example - when getting them joined up to a new sport or club. It's worth mentioning to the coach/leaders - but i think you have to explain to what extent the child actually ASD or at least what their triggers are.

Often terminology like “mild” and “high functioning” is based on how wider society experience the persons autism rather than what is actually going on for that individual.

It’s not a competition, everyone autism is unique to them so let’s not try to make it a race to the bottom.

I have a diagnosis of mild hearing loss. It's harder for me to hear than my peers with no hearing problems but unlike my friends DS with moderate to severe hearing loss I don't need hearing aids. (yet) That description would be correct

"Mild Autism" is very dismissive. It's how others see it

Diagnosed as a child perhaps? My husband copes well with life - he has a good job, a home, a wife, kids. He was diagnosed at 4 years old, when his autism was more 'obvious'. He had speech delay and needed a lot of extra help in school.

No but there are illnesses and conditions that vary in severity such as arthritis.

Autism can co-occur with learning difficulties, which may be what you're thinking of as severe autism. My autism isn't mild but I am intelligent, which is actually thought to increase depression and suicidality, particularly in autistic women.

But even then is it acceptable to suggest to someone they don’t suffer because theirs isn’t as bad?

DS has ARFID, his means he is tube fed and probably will be for life. I wouldn’t dream of trying to downplay the suffering of a child (and their family) when they do eat orally just a very limited amount.

I don’t like the idea of competitive suffering.

This is completely it!

You do suffer less with mild arthritis. It’s not offensive to say so.

But why do you need to? Why would you feel the need to tell someone their suffering isn’t valid?

Yes, this. Whenever someone says “oh, they’re mildly autistic” what they really mean is “their autism doesn’t impact me therefore it’s not a big deal”.

I have a "high functioning" son doing well in mainstream education with small scale reasonable adaptions. His home life is more adapted with lots of quiet, low demand down time. He takes longer to develop some skills but generally the level of adaption for him to keep functioning is managable and requires little external output. I didn't work through much of his childhood because he couldn't cope with childcare, and at 15, I still wouldn't leave him alone for a long day as he'd still struggle to recognise hunger and arrange a balanced meal to eat (dyspraxia also involved)

His life is very different to young people (and their carers) who require much more support and specislist support to get by. Autism is the condition and a fair way to describe it, but there isn't a simple shorthand way to succintly describe the intensity of impact of it as there can be with other conditions with multiple forms of impact.

It's also difficult to describe because it's a condition so bound with personality, interests, skils and challenges. It's not like when my mobility was impaired by pregnancy complications that while life and some interests was impacted, my general sense of self wasn't.

I think it will always be difficult to neatly describe autism because the impacts are so individual and personal despite the shared criteria of traits.

But why describe it as a race to the bottom? Why is it at all offensive or problematic to say that a diagnosis (be it cancer, pcos, high blood pressure, depression, dyslexia, autism or a myriad of other things like poverty or stress) can come in milder or more severe forms? Why do some people take the idea that maybe others have have it worse than them as an attack or an insult?

I personally don’t see it as an attack, but it just comes across as incredibly ignorant 🤷‍♀️

Wow, thank you x

I don’t see it as an attack. I see it as pointless. Why do people feel the need to tell people their experiences are less valid? At what point does something become severe enough to allow someone to feel they suffer?

How is it ignorant?

Surely it's more ignorant to assume all autistic people have the same needs, when clearly they don't.

Who has suggested they do?

The autism spectrum is not a scale from "mild" to "severe" it's like a colour wheel of different types of challenges, difficulties and differences, so each person's "shape" on the spectrum is different.

"Mild" isn't so much offensive as making the person who says it sound ignorant. If you perceive a particular person's autism as "mild" what you mean is that it doesn't pose an enormous amount of inconvenience to you, without considering what level of distress and difficulty might be going on for that person which you don't get to see, or the extent to which their functioning in the world is made possible by adjustments that you aren't part of. Not all autistic people have extreme communication difficulties but that doesn't mean an autistic person who is articulate has a "milder" form. A lot of the time, ignorant people's stereotypes about what "severe" autism looks like is complicated by them basing their stereotypes on what they know of people who have both Autism and other complex learning disability conditions and they think that whole complex set of needs is what "autism" means.