Is my DS’s tutor being unreasonable

[PWPmum]

My DS 11 who is in year 6 has a weekly tutor to help him prepare for his SATs and support his spelling. He is dyslexic. She insists on being paid at the beginning of the month with the sessions she will teach agreed in advance.
My DS is not well today. So I contacted the tutor to let her know he can’t do the lesson today and asked if we could roll the lesson over
she has replied saying as the cancellation is on the day and her time is booked out, there is no rolling over or refund.
But there will be no lesson today so part of me feels why should I pay?
She’s offered to teach him at the weekend but we’re busy then.
I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable or not to push for the credit to go towards next month or not.

YABU.

You would have a point if you gave more notice so she could rebook. I realise you couldn't, but it still means she ca't very easily rebook the slot. The risk of inconvenience for an ill child lies with the parent of that child - especially where she has offered an alternative slot.

There's no point in reminding the tutor that she roled over a lesson that the tutor cancelled at short notice as the tutor was legally required to refund or role over the lesson as the tutor was unable to meet her contractual obligations. There is no such requirement or legal obligation to do the same when the client cancels at short notice.
These are completely different circumstances @PWPmum owes the money and is just too cheap and entitled to accept this fact

I assume you'll be happy if your boss or your DH's boss rings up tomorrow morning and says don't bother coming in to work, I'm closing the office today and I'm not going to pay you?

You seem to think she should give you special treatment because you've recommended her to other people, like she owes you commission or something.

Wow! This stinks of someone who has never been self-employed. What would happen to her business if multiple people did this!

My DD is a dance teacher and this type of attitude is precisely why she insists that people pay in advance. She's previously had occasions where she has been waiting for pupils booked in for a one to one lesson who just haven't turned up. If she gets sufficient notice to cancel the hire of the premises or can fill the slot with another pupil then she will roll over a payment, but otherwise, no way! Venue hire and bills still need to be paid as does her mortgage etc. She's sympathetic if someone is ill but not only would she not be earning, but she still has financial outgoings when a lesson is cancelled. It's unfortunate if a child is unwell but why on earth should a teacher have to pay for it?
If you you an appointment with say a solicitor or a private dentist and you cancelled without adequate notice you'd still be expected to pay, whatever the reason. (And at my dentist, do it more than once or twice and you'll be removed as a patient.) Why do people think that those who earn their living from teaching should be any different? They're not doing it out of charity and they have bills to pay just like the rest of us.

Are you serious?
How is she supposed to make a living? People can't live off recommendations anymore than artists can live off "exposure".

She can afford to lose the income just because your child is ill and she had no obligation to offer you a different slot.

Tutors get no income during the holidays as thry are self-employed. You're being majorly unreasonable

one time she cancelled on the day as she was unwell and that time she did roll the credit over.

Of course she did. If she cancels late, then she takes the hit. If you cancel late, you take the hit.

If this is not a reverse, I hope that the tutor stops teaching OP’s ds.

This thread has made me mad.

Yabu - unbelievably so.

I had to cancel my son’s tutor last night. Of course I have to still pay her.

The sad reality is because of dickheads like OP the tutor will stop being unnecessarily accommodating and offering an alternative slot on her own weekend.

You are so incredibly unreasonable, I struggle to find the words to describe it. This is her job. It’s not her hobby. She pays her bills from the money she makes tutoring your son. She keeps this timeslot free for you. She can’t just go and magically fill it with someone else! She’s offered you an alternative, but you find your son’s hobby more important than her tutoring. I understand why she asks for money upfront - it’s to ensure she can still pay for her rent at the end of the month!

Agree. It’s standard for most things, eg osteopath, physio.

The tutor has reserved that slot for your child and is now unable to use it for anything else. Of course you should pay.

This has to be non-negotiable.
I started off tutoring being quite 'soft' because I expected parents to be thoughtful. Over the years I had to tighten up .
It was fees paid half-termly and no refunds (unless I cancelled.)

I have to say the majority of parents were lovely. But there was always someone who'd be late with payment, making me wait for 2 weeks into the term for the fees.

It was completely disrespectful and I had the feeling some parents thought 'she doesn't need the money' and it was a hobby!

DH is a tutor. It's 24 hours min. to cancel. It was very lucky for you to be offered the weekend alternative.
Tutoring is more than the hour spent face to face, it's at least 3 times as much in preparation and marking.
You are being naive, selfish and very unreasonable.

Thanks for all your replies. We managed to fix a mutually convenient time for the weekend.
When my DS started with her, I used to pay weekly which I preferred but she asked me to swap to a month in advance. She said this was because she often had to chase people for payment after each lesson. I hold my hands up that this included me sometimes which is why I agreed to change to the more formal set up.

Wow, so you are a late payer as well?

You're very lucky that she has agreed to offer you another slot. You should perhaps read through the responses on this thread and take some time to reflect on how you treat other people.

Lots of tutors would just drop you for this kind of behaviour. Many have long waiting lists and don't need clients who fail to treat them with basic respect.

It's too late for her to fill that space, so she would lose out. YABVVVVVU.

You're incredibly lucky she hasn't dumped you already. Do you think her mortgage or electricity company allowed her to pay late because you couldn't be bothered to pay your bills on time?

It's standard. I have to give 48 hours notice of cancellation for DDs' driving lessons. So when DD2 wasn't feeling good on Friday night, I had to consider whether I thought she was going to be well enough for a lesson on Monday. I messaged the driving instructor on Saturday morning saying 'I'm not sure she'll be well enough so I need to cancel so she doesn't lose the hours.' He said 'Thanks, hope she feels better.' - He didn't say 'see how she goes', 'let's wait until later...' or anything else, despite the fact that her sister has a lesson just before her. It's just the deal.

Have you read her terms and conditions? Presumably, you agreed to them. YAB massively unreasonable. She's being very kind to offer a weekend slot when she doesn't need to. If you don't value your tutor, find someone else. I'm sure she will easily replace your child.

If SHE cancels, then she rolls the slot over. YOU cancel, your problem. Surely this is obvious to you, and part of the contract of terms when you started using her?