When should elderly parents downsize?

[Hogwartsian]

My parents are in their early eighties and still healthy and fit. They have a large 5 bed house with a large garden. They are still managing to maintain it, for now. I'm just wondering if there's a point when they should prepare for the day they can't manage it all anymore, and downsize to something more suitable?

Is anyone else in this situation? Or when did your parents downsize?

They might not want to downsize, but they should certainly think about how their house could be adapted. It's traumatic to have to think about stairs and bathrooms if suddenly incapacitated, and they will be able to live fuller lives longer if they can ensure that e.g. the garden is accessible.

Before they have to (before a fall makes stairs difficult, before eyesight stops them driving and the shops are too far away, before one of them dies or goes into care leaving the other with an unmanageable house)

I just got an email from my aunt in New Zealand. She is very sensibly downsizing from her large house ( was widowed about 10 years ago) into a very sensible apartment in a retirement community close to town. Another aunt also moved to one - again widowed.
One thing both these ladies have in common is that they haven’t got their own adult DCs although both are step mothers.

I wonder if consciously or unconsciously having DCs makes people think they need to do less forward planning as they will be looked after when the day comes. Or another common denominator is they are both ladies and women in general seem to be more sensible about the need to plan for the future and not become an inadvertent burden on your adult DC.

I think women in general are more aware of the burden of caring for elderly relatives - because it invariably falls to the female children.

OP hasn't been back (shame).
My elderly parents don't want to acknowledge their situation, my dad has become disabled and it will get worse. I try to talk to them about what could happen in their home to keep it suitable for him but... they don't want that conversation. It acknowledges too much the situation they hate being in.

this thread is making me itch to move to a much smaller property, lol

Whilst our house (and the garden) is really too big for us now, the location is actually very suitable for later life as it is very close to all amenities and good public transport links. We also have a downstairs bathroom off of a living room which could adapt to an ensuite bedroom if required (was used by my disabled mum many years ago). So my DH is not being completely unreasonable wanting to stay here just that I would prefer something smaller and more manageable and not having to worry about having to do all the decluttering and downsizing later on when I will be older myself, but he is as unmoveable as the rock of Gibraltar so it is what it is.

The biggest motivation to downsize, declutter myself was having to do it for my mum when she passed. Also watching friends sort out their own parents ‘stuff’. I’m determined my children will have little to do.

Coincidentally, we've just come back from a trip to visit friends in Surrey who downsized last year from five-beds and a sprawling garden to a very sensible (actually near-perfect) three bed about five miles away from their original house. So, their friendship circle is intact, and logistically it's still very convenient for afternoons or evenings in London by public transport. They both still drive, and it's freed up some cash so they can continue to afford glorious holidays, once the hip replacement is bedded in!

DH has seen a new build that he likes, and is quite keen to have it built if we can find a suitable plot. It's almost the identical lay out to our friends, which is plenty big enough to entertain and have overnight visitors, but DH wants a slightly larger garden and a garage too!

@Crikeyalmighty we have looked at both Bath and Cheltenham, but we're thinking of going a little further northwest. Mainly because we like the landscape better, and it holds more work-opportunity for DS.