To have a secret snack drawer

[Dolly34]

There’s a drawer in our kitchen that I know my husband never looks in. I bought some chocolate to bake with the other day and hid it in this draw so he wouldn’t find it and eat it before I baked. Since then, I’ve bought a big dairy milk caramel bar and left it in there for when I want to pick at it.
It’s been in there over a week, and I know if it was anywhere else, my DH would have inhaled it.

Today, I bought a pack of chocolate hobnobs and put them in the draw - again so I can pick at at my leisure when working from
home.

AIBU by hiding food from my husband to keep for myself?

(some extra context that I’ve been going through IVF this month and just want a stash for when I need it, rather than going to get something and it’s disappeared!)

• [Note from MNHQ: We've edited the typo in the title and the opening post, just so the thread doesn't (continue!) to get derailed by people pointing it out... Give the OP a break!]

YANBU under the circumstances, but I do judge your husband quite harshly for being unable to control himself. You’re going through IVF which he has to know is really hard, and he can’t bring himself to let you have a small stash of chocolate for when you want it? It’s so unfathomably selfish! I hope he is a caring and considerate man in other ways that make up it, because this would drive me bonkers.

You should be able to leave snacks that you bought somewhere and reasonably expect them to still be there the next time you want to eat them.

YANBU. I buy chocolate for all the family and then if they run out then they run out but they can’t then have mine. So I hide mine so I can have it for a treat. My husband complains if I buy chocolate for him, he complains if there is no chocolate in the house so I just buy some and tell him to eat it in moderation.

Or. There are communal snacks which you are free to help yourself to a reasonable quantity of. And there are “personal” snacks (like a box of chocolates) that you can share if you want to but nobody should touch without asking. I can’t begin to imagine having to hide food in my own home.

I have a secret stash too!!! I hide my stuff - mainly my nice protein bars - in a cooking pot inside a cupboard. Works a treat! In my defence it’s the only thing I really eat in the morning and I got sick of the kids pinching them

I also buy myself nice ice cream lollies in summer and hide them inside a bag of frozen peas 😂

Can't you just tell them these items are yours? I think it's a bit sad that you can't count on them to respect your stuff.

People who don't enjoy the quiet, secret, solitary pleasure of eating from a secret stash just won't understand what it's like. It's nothing to do with being greedy or selfish, there's so much more to it than that. As mums/grandmas we spend a lot of time putting the rest of the family before ourselves, buying/cooking the food they all like to eat, including sweets/treats, and so having a secret stash of goodies just for us is a little present to ourselves for being so wonderful 😂🤣

I don’t think the women eating from a secret stash are being greedy or selfish. The people making this a necessity are the greedy and selfish ones, and the adult men making it a necessity are absolutely horrible role models for their children. Both for being greedy and selfish about food AND for creating a family where the woman puts everyone before herself without recognition. Sorry for the sense of humor failure, I feel so strongly about this!

Shared or personal snacks in a communal cupboard are all very well, but since DS unthinkingly at the last mini bar of chocolate before I'd had a chance to eat any I'm keeping mine hidden.

It's the men who are greedy and selfish for taking more than their fair share of sweets/treats to the point women feel like they have no choice but to hide food in their own home.

Or you could talk to your DS about being thoughtful and considerate?

It’s “for fuck’s sake.”