To not want to stop BF 17 month old

[Sunny123Skies67]

I'm starting to get a lot of pressure to wean DS. From my own parents, my partner, and now even friends who I have confided to. Everyone thinks it's weird and bad for me, although I have not complained. Everyone now makes jokes about me BF him on his first day of school 😥

I only BF morning and evening and for naps, when I'm not at work. Never out and about. He eats a lot of food and has a great diet.

But it's so fucking useful. It puts him to sleep INSTANTLY. "Bedtime" takes 5 minutes. I don't have to rock and sing or whatever. It helps with teething. He sleeps 10.5 hours straight usually, but when he does ocasionally wake (around 4/5am), a quick boob puts him back to sleep.

He was a terrible sleeper 6-13 months (he took teething very badly) so I'm afraid to change something that works so well.

He loves nursing late afternoon or if he's overstimulated, it's like a little zen moment for him.

His nanny or his dad do ocasionally put him to bed at night, it's not a problem. I don't feel tied down. But his dad is now using this as an argument to stop BF.

Sorry you have such thick parents and an idiotic husband. There’s no point arguing with stupid and ignorant people sometimes. It’s your choice. Carry on as you are, as long aa you like!

Wean whenever you like (I did at 20m for my own health reasons as it made me too hungry to exercise).

Just FYI, you can probably get him understanding "all gone" now - went with a 5-7 rule at both ends of the day then told him my milk was all gone when he asked when I stopped.

Keep going until either you or your child want to stop. Nobody else’s opinion is relevant.

Currently (literally) bfing my 2 year old. Completely understand the benefits you’ve listed. My family are also quick to comment “oh he doesn’t need that now” etc. I just reply well at the end of the day we are mammals it is what we are supposed to do?!

My daughter was just over 3 when we dropped the final feed before bed. At that point it wasn't adding anything and had started to feel wrong. I certainly hadn't planned to breastfeed for so long but it felt so right and I'd have resented forever anyone who'd guilted me into stopping. Don't stop! It's your right to breastfeed.

What do they mean too attached? All parents, especially mum's are attached to their babies/children aren't they? I don't think you can be too attached.
With regards to bf do it as long as you and your LO want to, no-one else's business.
Is your partner against it because he wants to do bedtime more often, even though you said he can or is it something else? I'd try and find out what the issue is, but don't stop breastfeeding.

I still breastfeed my nearly 3 year old, the only negative comments I've had have been from my mum (who weirdly is a big advocate of breastfeeding but apparently it gets to an arbitrary tipping line with toddlers when you should stop 🙄). After a while of gritting my teeth I told her that she was annoying me and it was none of her business, luckily she hasn't mentioned it since!

I am going to wean soon as frankly I've had enough now, we've been reading booby moon which is sweet and I think helps them prepare for it being 'all gone'.

But don't feel pressured into doing it before you're ready, you do the right thing for you and your little one and try not to care what other people think 😊

It probably depends on who your circle is. In my circle it was weird of me to stop BF at 18 months, all the others carried on til 2+. I am in the UK. Just suit yourself and say “sorry it’s none of you’re business” if anyone is cheeky enough to comment

You are doing an amazing thing for your child. Ignore people who have no idea what they are talking about.

It's between you and your baby, no-one else. I BF my first until he was 3 and a bit (stopped because I was pregnant and my boobs hurt!), my second is just over 2 and I still feed her too. FIL complained about it but DH had my back and repeatedly told him it was nothing to do with him! Sounds like your DH needs to learn the same...

Sounds like you’re doing amazing! Keep up the good work.
Those that suggest BF less are simply uninformed or jealous.

I fed number 1 until 2.5 years and number 2 is just turned 2 and going strong

I'll feed until she or I want to stop and if anyone tried to cajole me into stopping before that point I would massively resent them

I've also had comments from family and I genuinely think it's ridiculous. Current society is idiotic. They make you feel guilty and "less than" if you dont breastfeed your newborn, then they shun you if you nurse past the age of 1.

It's a wonderful thing you're doing!

You should join your local Le Leche League toddler group and meet other like minded mums. I stopped feeding at 2.5 years but I still go to the meetings. Lots of people feeding 3,4 even 5 year olds. You're not weird!

My parents are not British (although I was born here). I was farmed off to relatives from 11 months until I was 7 (which my parents think was great for me and I thoroughly fundamentally disagree and have struggled with this my whole life). Culturally, it's normal for wider family to be a lot more involved. But my parents have now retired abroad to warm continental Europe (I know, the irony) and complaining that they don't see their grandchild enough 😂

I fed DS until he was turned 3 and he started to self wean. The less he had, the less milk there was and he just stopped quite naturally. I found it a lovely way to reconnect when I went back to work after he was 1 and it was very useful to get him to sleep and if he was tired/poorly to settle him. My mum used to tell him 'you are to big for that now' and we used to ignore her :) Once he was eating a good amount of solid food, I fed him morning then bedtime and then just bedtime. Sounds like your parents want you to stop for their benefit and not yours or your DSs and I don't blame you for wanting him either you whenever you can if you work full time. Maybe when he's a bit older they could him while you work. Stick to your guns.

Ignore your family and friends. You are doing something amazing and believe me time goes so fast. He will stop when he is ready.

The World Health Organization recommends feeding until 2 or beyond. I fed till 3 with mine. I believe that longer feeding also offers you greater protection against breast cancer, if you need a reason to give them.

I understand that it is difficult for grandparents, particularly if their friends are having grandchildren for sleepovers. There's a lot of peer pressure on them. Just reassure them that little one loves them and that he will be able to have sleepovers when he's bigger . . .

Best of luck.

People are arses, I’m sorry you’re feeling pressure to stop. As everyone else has said ignore them and do what you feel is right for you and your baby. 17 months is still so little!

You have lots of good company here with lots of us breastfeeding to 2 and beyond. Don’t give it up until you’re ready to.

Please ignore them. It’s your choice when you stop. It’s completely normal to BF into childhood, if you’re happy doing it, why stop.

I weaned at 4 months with both kids but plenty of friends kept going to 2/2.5 years - not unusual. It also sounds like you've somehow managed to get a good balance much more than most people i know as a lot of them had sleep issues related to night feeding so well done. Do what you want to do.

Keep going! I massively regretted stopping breast feeding mine at 12 months. If I could turn back time, I’d do it until at least 2.

The average weaning age is up to (or averaging 7)?! That’s crazy. Surely, some of that is related to sanitation, rather than aspirational?

I did it up to 17 months but stopped when old enough to pull off midway and talk to me, it was just too weird, personally.

Disclaimer: It’s up to the individual to make whatever choice.

In my opinion as long as you are doing it for the benefit of your child and not yourself, carry on.

I know someone who used to literally force her 3 year old to breastfeed because she loved the cuddles and connection, but you could see the child didn’t want to do it and felt uncomfortable.

I have grown up kids. That’s made me realise that a 17 month old is a baby!
If I were you I would feed for another year or so and not feel bad about it.
Like others have mentioned around the world the average age to boob feed is up to 7 years.

Trust your gut instinct, you are doing a great job at meeting your son’s needs. It’s absurd for grandparents to suggest you are ‘too attached’. Bf is good for so many things, don’t cave in to pressure from others.