To ask if you grew up in a clean and tidy home?

[Netcurtainnelly]

Apparently your more likely to be clean and tidy if you were.

No. It was chaos. We grew up with a single mum who couldn't cope financially or practically. House was always disorganised, messy, at times dirty, seldom had much food in. So I am the total opposite and get intense anxiety about any mess. I was diagnosed with OCD and I blame my childhood.

So it isn't black and white.

Yes, clean and tidy house growing up and always have had clean and tidy houses as an adult.

I can’t stand mess - it makes me anxious. I do have OCD, and although my themes have never focused on germs/cleanliness, I do think it has an influence somewhat.

Not immaculate by any means, but the washing up was always done after every meal, and the meals were home cooked and often grown in the garden, so there was always quite a bit of gardening going on and muddy boots and things. My Mum was very anti-bleach - just used soapy water for everything. I think lack of money was more the problem, everything was a bit worn and uncomfortable. I remember being cold. But I was also able to play long elaborate make believe games with loads of toys out, and I loved all that. Mess wasn’t punished. My imagination was very good and there were books everywhere - shelves and shelves of them. My friends from immaculate homes always commented on that.

I am similar in my approach with my child - there’s toys out mid-game everywhere. The house is her playground. I get a cleaner every couple of weeks and roughly keep on top of it in between, but I’m not bothered by mess.

I didn't. However, I have been clean and tidy all my adult life. Can't stand clutter, grubbiness etc. Too much stuff and mess makes me feel claustrophobic and a bit panicky.

I have an ‘immaculate’ house but we have hundreds of books. They’re just put away tidily on a bookshelf when not being read!

No it was an embarrassment of a home.
My house is clean and tidy, I hate mess and clutter.

No, and it’s a battle every day to keep things clean and tidy (mainly because I’m fighting a hoarder instinct, which is my parents problem). It doesn’t come as naturally as I wish it would. I also really struggle visiting my parents now because it’s so unclean and untidy (they are physically fit and also have the means to hire help but just don’t care).

I don’t want my DC to be embarrassed of their home in the way I was.

Growing up my parents house was messy and not very clean, bathroom and kitchen especially. If someone just called round it was that bad they could not be invited in.

now, my house is clean and tidy, not immaculate, but ok if anyone called by unannounced. I would not have my kids feel like I did growing up.

My house was awful growing up. We had too many pets. Too much stuff. Parents worked full time. They weren't house proud at all, I was embarrassed to bring friends over. The garden was perfectly pruned and mowed though.

My house is clean. Usually tidy. Nothing that wouldn't be sorted with half an hours effort. A couple of clutter spots. But I have pets that I can manage. They get bathed after walks or if it's a dry day, wiped down with pet wipes. We don't have a hundred cups/plates. Only a couple extras so they're always on top of. Clothes hamper rarely overflows , I wash atleast one load a day then everything is put away by the next day. I hoover almost daily and wash the carpets monthly. The sofa gets stripped and washed regularly as does all bedding. Curtains get washed a few times a year when I can line dry.

My minor worry is exactly this though. My grandparents had clean homes. My parents didn't. I do... I just hope my children appreciate how I try to keep on top of things and hopefully, they won't be able to bear living in a dump when they have their own places... I'm hoping they get used to a clean space and will keep on top of their own homes.

No, absolutley filthy. Mentally ill parents, no bath, outside loo, coal fire and lots of dirt. Now I have a very comfortable welcoming home, though not immaculate.

Yes and no. I grew up in the 80s, house was always clean and tidy. Mum hated clutter, everything had its place but both parents smoked so everything (and me) stank of fags. My house is clean and tidy but I don’t freak out if stuff is left out, not tidied away immediately. I am hyper aware of how my house smells at all times!

Yes I did and my house is the same.

That's my point and why I struggle. I spend my life running round with a vacuum to make sure the house is clean as I can't stand fur and mud on the floors! I find it really hard that my DH (whose parents didn't have a clean tidy home) doesn't seem to see the mess his dog makes!!

My house was clean and tidy my bedroom was not. My own home is clean and tidy

Yes, my parents smoked in the house and it was a source of great embarrassment to me growing up that my house smelt of cigarettes. I am also hyper aware of how my house smells!

No it was awful. Cold and dirty. When I was old enough it was me who cleaned it.

My flat is very small, but it's clean and as tidy as I can get it.

Yes and no, it was sporadic, from the age of 9+ I did most of the cleaning.

My mother was a narc and I was Cinderella, I cleaned to please her but never cleaned well enough.

I have to have an immaculate home, I do it for myself and to maintain control.

Yes, but only because we kids did all the cleaning.

We still basically do all the cleaning, except now we just do bits here and there when we visit/can be bothered.

As it is, their house is forever dusty and shambolic.

(We have a cleaner ourselves now - my mum sneers at the idea of having a cleaner, which would be more valid if she had ever cleaned her own house.)

Clean yes, tidy, not particularly. We had a lot of "stuff" in our house, books (thousands of them), toys, CDs and vinyl, household paraphernalia of various kinds. Loads of pictures on the walls. My dad had a home office which was full of documents of various kinds.

My mum had a cleaner who came weekly and it would look spotless for a couple of days but would degenerate.

I like tidiness from the perspective that it reduces stress and makes me more relaxed, but I would hate that "show home" feel. I'd much rather be in a house which is full of objects which have sentimental value to the family than one where you feel you can eat off the surfaces. I also work full time and don't have the time or the patience to be constantly tidying.

My mum was obsessed with our house being clean and very proud of that. I remember as a child wishing she would play with us instead or do more things together. Looking back, the house was quite cluttered but definitely clean.

As a young adult my home was never tidy (mostly clean but definitely not fastidiously so). It was such a relief not to live somewhere that someone was constantly cleaning and complaint about it not being clean enough!

Now I have my own kids I always have our home clean, calm and organised but this doesn’t really come naturally to me and is something I’ve had to work hard on. I think because my own mum was so obsessed with cleanliness, she never taught us to do anything and it just felt like an stress/punishment.

I’m now tying to teach my kids (especially the one who has ADHD) how much a (mostly) and organised home can help you but also that there are so many other important things in life!

No, I didn’t. Now I have a clean organised home, it didn’t come naturally and took time. Growing up in an untidy, unorganised home, not able to find anything, losing a shoe, no space, clothes everywhere was stressful and I didn’t want my children going through it.

Yes but DH did not and it is a source of friction on occasion. My DM was fastidious so the house was always visitor ready, DH had a slightly odd upbringing in that until he was a teenager they lived in various different serviced accommodation that came with his parent’s jobs so it was always hygienic but too small for the family so constantly cluttered. It also meant that he didn’t really understand cleaning and the frequency required until he lived in a shared house at university!
Our house is always hygienic, never spotless, messy by my standards and immaculately tidy by his…

Same here. I was embarrassed to bring friends home unless I could clean and tidy up first.

My home is clean and tidy and welcoming.

No but I live in one now.

Yes to clean (ish), absolutely no to a tidy childhood home. I am both though now and find it hard to relax if the house isn't tidy.