HH income of £250k but we don’t feel rich?

[Bdrgvlugcbu]

Not a brag in the slightest! And wouldn’t discuss this non-anonymously.

DH earns just over £250k per year. Has fallen into the role really and is based on natural ability/talent as oppose to lots of hard work and training. He works very long hours though. I’m a SAHM to 3 young children.

Take home is approx £12k per month.

School fees: £3,000 per month
Mortgage, car and bills: £3500 per month
Personal savings £2000 per month
Kids savings: £450 per month
DH and I take: £500 personal money each per month
Leaves us with £2,000 per month for general spending, food shopping, days out, holidays, children’s clothes…

We don’t really go without, but we don’t feel “well off” by any means. Where are we going wrong?!

I guess your situation is a bit different because it reads like you both work (nursery fees and afterschool club), plus you have a very significant expense for your sen dc. I imagine that is not really a choice.

OP is choosing to send dc to private school, choosing not to work, and has a cleaner. Op can 'only' buy clothes from M&S, Next etc, and 'only' has £500 personal spending money for herself EVERY MONTH.

I still don't quite understand how you can only afford to have your hair once a year.

My diamond is too heavy for my hand

Hold me in your sleeves lads, send thoughts and prayers my way😭😭😭😭

He earned 180k for 15 years and they have a mortgage and no pension?! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Absolutely ridiculous.

Get a job or bin off the school fees.

YABU

Who would you like to see reply to her? Clearly the one that earn no where near it are only going to reply something bitter.

You still have £2500 as the “rest” after all bills! And can’t afford a hair cut more than once a year! Sure thing 🙄

also nursery fees are not forever.

Wow. Maybe save less per month and then you’ll feel loaded. We’re very privileged to live on waaay less than that and feel very lucky but we haven’t managed to save a penny for the last 22 years since having a family. It’s a privilege to be able to save that much per month.

Taking home £10 - £12k a month is not wealthy 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 oh my days. Gotta love mumsnet for its total detachment from reality

£180k for 15 years and you are both late 30’s - that is a very very large salary from a very young age.
Did you have children at a young age and have been paying school fees since you mid-20’s? If so, assuming they are teenagers, why are you not working to contribute to the savings?
Or have both been very profligate and wasteful?
Either way, having disposable income to save thousands for yourselves, children and pay school fees does mean you are in a very fortunate position.

I’ll bite, OP. We’re a £10k a month household.

What I’m reading here is that you have a lot of income, but you don’t have a lot of security. Financial wellbeing and financial security are two different things.

Now, you must recognise that you have security in terms of choices. You speak of not feeling ‘well off’. Your choices are in fact the thing that makes you well off, but you have to accept that money-rich isn’t the only type of rich. You are choice rich.

Of course, no one, no matter how much money they have wants to make the the choice to sell their home or pull their children out school if the shit really did hit the fan. Those are emotionally loaded and irrespective of money.

What you have to accept, however, if that you can’t have it all ways. You can’t have the big spending AND the financial wellbeing you are craving. You have a lot of income, but you don’t have enough income for that.

You’re in the position you’re in, so you’re only choice is to either sit with the anxiety or to relinquish a number of your big spends – school fees and/or your £2000 fun money a month. After all your kids are young so the school fees are going to exponentially rise.

I’d hazard to guess that without the private school or fun money that you then won’t feel well off in either due to no longer having them.

The very simple answer is that you have a lot of money, but you don’t have THAT much money.

So he earned 180k for 15 years, now earns 250k, you have 'less than 120k' in pensions (how much less? Over 100k?) and you're not even 40?

Seriously. You're doing more than fine.

If it's not a rage post I'm genuinely gobsmacked that you don't see how lucky you are. No, you aren't 'rich' but you are EXTREMELY comfortable and very lucky.

LOL.

Sorry this is demented. If you earn six figures plus you get some very good pension advice.

I don’t care if this is a wind up now. If you are a SAHM and your husband does not have a pension arrangement earning above 100k then you need to sit down and have a serious conversation. You can never save enough so do it immediately and FGS see a financial adviser

You are having a giraffe,

Are you really trying to tell me OP posted at 19.55 and the squillion posts since then are all in the same wage bracket?

Mumsnet has some gems at times and this is another.

• Tinkly laugh ** Head tilt

We have a household income of probably £100k ish (in a good year, currently I have cancer so not able to work, so wouldn’t really call it a good year). We have an £800k house, that we hope to pay the mortgage off on in about 5 ish years (10 years after purchase). We have expensive hobbies and I have a horse (used to have 2!). And two dc, though in state school with no childcare costs. I feel quite comfortable and fortunate (minus the unfortunate cancer thing 😂) so you’re obviously doing something wrong.

Oh my god

Welcome to Mumsnet aka Fantasy Island! 😂

She's too busy telling the cleaner and the ironing technician what to do.

You HAVE got lots of money left over - you're saving £2000 a month.

I don't understand posts like these. It's clearly made up but why? Is the OP sat on her own thinking she's funny? Or is it a group of pissed women thinking they're funny? Or teenagers? I'd love to know. I kind of hope it's the latter. It's obviously still not funny but I'd be quite concerned about an adult that did this for shits and giggles.

So mortgage, bills and cars is £3.5k, plus £2k for other spends, but you don't live in a big house, don't drive fancy cars, buy supermarket clothes and shop in aldi.... you must drink an awful lot of takeaway coffee I guess 😅

This is just a prime example of Rage Bait. Similar to the Torygraph posing made up shit about people on £300k unable to afford children.

Pathetic

Honestly, i think school fees for 3 on that income is a stretch.

DH and I are on just over 300k between us but split so its more tax efficient than one earner.

We don't (and won't) pay private fees, we'd feel skint if we did.

I don’t believe for a minute you both grew up very poor. If you did you’d know you’re being utterly ridiculous.

Wind up. FFS.