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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

ICE and your young adult child

143 replies

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 14:31

DC is a dual citizen (US and UK), just finished university and is living and working in a city in the US where ICE is about to be deployed.

What would you say to them?

OP posts:
Enterthewolves · 16/01/2026 15:56

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 15:55

There's actually nothing wrong with protesting, the issue is where so called protesters start being aggressive, attacking and impeding federal agents.

Blocking federal agents with your car, throwing stuff at them etc is illegal and NOT protesting.

Many of those so called protesters are paid from extremists leftist groups, that's different from the average American protesting which they have the right to do peacefully. You can see the groups "training" how to attack and frustrate ICE agents online.

Edited

That’s not what several people injured by ICE were doing- you are victim blaming

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 15:59

Pallisers · 16/01/2026 15:52

Nothing, live your life. I live in Chicago and nothing she changes about my day to day life because I don't go interfering with federal agents, blocking them with my car, screaming at them, shoving cameras in their faces, throwing stuff at them etc.

You'll be fine so. It will NEVER happen to you.

And are you saying that if you do the things you describe it is fair play to be shot dead in the face by law enforcement and be called a "fucking bitch" immediately afterwards?

WTF are you going on about? No it will never happen to me because I am not fucking stupid to interfere with federal agents doing their jobs and blocking them with my car etc.

Even the head of Chicago Police an also recently the head of Minneapolis police have said it's illegal to impede and attack federal agents, simple.

And I don't even get the point, shouting, shoving cameras, screaming, blocking, do they really think ICE will let illegal immigrants go because of their stupid actions? Do they really think they are making a difference???

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 16:01

Enterthewolves · 16/01/2026 15:56

That’s not what several people injured by ICE were doing- you are victim blaming

Yeah I'm victim blaming indeed.

I've seen the so called protests in person so cut the crap. Many of them are leftists idiots with white saviour complex, and that's coming from a black person.

Listen to what the head of Chicago Police says and he was attacked for this by the mayor and leftist groups btw:

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/mrPcFlrBmD8

Before you continue to YouTube

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/mrPcFlrBmD8

EasternStandard · 16/01/2026 16:05

Does your dc want to protest op or is it more your views?

Octavia64 · 16/01/2026 16:06

Protests are going to do the square root of fuck all.

if he actually wants to help he should get involved with charities working with the people who are there illegally/have been detained

note I am not in the us and I am not sure if this is permitted.

protests do not help the people on the receiving end of this. Nor do they have any impact on slowing the system down.

Pallisers · 16/01/2026 16:06

Yeah no one ever thinks it will happen to them.

Yes I do think the protesters are making a difference. They are expressing the disapproval that the majority of americans feel about the chaotic, illegal, cruel, and inhumane actions of the barely-trained ICE agents. And if you think they deserve to be shot in the face for protesting, I suggest you read the american constitution.

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 16:19

Pallisers · 16/01/2026 16:06

Yeah no one ever thinks it will happen to them.

Yes I do think the protesters are making a difference. They are expressing the disapproval that the majority of americans feel about the chaotic, illegal, cruel, and inhumane actions of the barely-trained ICE agents. And if you think they deserve to be shot in the face for protesting, I suggest you read the american constitution.

I am all for protesting, I've said so already, but I disagree with the violent idiots who think they can impede, block, attack agents. It's wrong, it's stupid and dangerous not only to the idiot "protestors" but the agents and the person they are arresting

Protest all you want, that's our fundamental right but attacking is illegal.

And sorry but ICE arresting illegals immigrants is now illegal? 😂 Maybe if liberals cities don't declare themselves sanctuary cities to protect illegal immigrants we would have a better immigration system. You do realize the Democrats are just using this politics ahead of the midterms right? Surely you don't think they give a shit about people? Didn't they do this when Biden won and then reversed all the immigration policies only tor flip back towards the election and ramp up deportations???

That's like Khan deleting London is open to illegal immigrants in opposition to the Home Office rules and causing chaos and confusion. Immigration is a FEDERAL responsibility not state or city so those so called sanctuary cities are illegal. Start there.

You think it's fine that millions cross the border every year majority of whom have no valid asylum claim but take advantage of a backlogged overwhelmed system which means that they are released into the country and disappear into sanctuary cities?

Does the American Constitution give people the right to attack federal agents???

And btw this is law in Minnesota signed by Walz:

"In Minnesota, deadly force with a car (or any object) is justified if an officer reasonably believes it's necessary to prevent imminent death or great bodily harm, treating vehicles as deadly weapons, especially if driven at someone; recent laws (M.S. § 609.066) focus on specific, articulated threats, though discussions continue to add "apparent" to the standard, and generally, officers must meet strict tests, though cars used recklessly can be considered dangerous weapons under the law. "

So protests all you want but don't attack or impede federal agents, that's stupid, dangerous and virtue signalling.

Ihavelostthegame · 16/01/2026 16:27

I wouldn’t encourage him to put himself in danger. There are ways to help without being in the firing line. If he is wanting to do things to assist then getting involved in doing this like shopping runs for people who don’t feel safe leaving the house etc might be a way of assisting without risking open conflict with ICE.

If he does still want to protest directly then taking some measures to keep himself safe. Make sure he has his phone on him with battery and the means to record. Don’t get in direct confrontation with ICE. Follow orders and protect himself. The old analogy of putting the oxygen mask on yourself first I think is quite relevant here.

showyourquality · 16/01/2026 17:01

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 15:49

@user3867599 Nothing, live your life. I live in Chicago and nothing she changes about my day to day life because I don't go interfering with federal agents, blocking them with my car, screaming at them, shoving cameras in their faces, throwing stuff at them etc.

I know the media and social media etc all paint this picture like the average person in the USA is running around in danger but she absolutely not true, and majority of the so called protesters are professional protestors paid by interest groups.

Here is a reddit sub that may give more insight I tot everyday life. https://www.reddit.com/r/immigration/s/S2USTGPPOA

Edited

There are changes in cities like Chicago for many people if not everyone.

I have seen people pulled from the street screaming when they were going about their daily business. Hispanic moms with babies in pushchairs fleeing away.

The local shops have signs highlighting that ice cannot enter.
Local schools had pickup issues with ICE picking up parents at collections.

Businesses in Hispanic areas had a large drop in footfall and income.

My life and lives of people I live and work with have been impacted.

We now have to carry important documents with us that we used to be able to keep safely at home. A small thing compared to everything else but not a good sign of a country’s health.

It is possible to ignore what is happening but that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening.

ByCyanMoose · 16/01/2026 17:02

Ilovelifeverymuch · 16/01/2026 15:55

There's actually nothing wrong with protesting, the issue is where so called protesters start being aggressive, attacking and impeding federal agents.

Blocking federal agents with your car, throwing stuff at them etc is illegal and NOT protesting.

Many of those so called protesters are paid from extremists leftist groups, that's different from the average American protesting which they have the right to do peacefully. You can see the groups "training" how to attack and frustrate ICE agents online.

Edited

What a delightful imagination you have! Are the paid protestors in the room with us now?

ByCyanMoose · 16/01/2026 17:03

Ihavelostthegame · 16/01/2026 16:27

I wouldn’t encourage him to put himself in danger. There are ways to help without being in the firing line. If he is wanting to do things to assist then getting involved in doing this like shopping runs for people who don’t feel safe leaving the house etc might be a way of assisting without risking open conflict with ICE.

If he does still want to protest directly then taking some measures to keep himself safe. Make sure he has his phone on him with battery and the means to record. Don’t get in direct confrontation with ICE. Follow orders and protect himself. The old analogy of putting the oxygen mask on yourself first I think is quite relevant here.

All this. Also, if he has medications, he should bring at least a few days supply with him.

Itsmetheflamingo · 16/01/2026 17:08

I’m not sure it would occur to me to worry to be honest. American (and the state they are in presumably) is bloody enormous. The chances of them even interacting with ICE are minuscule

SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:18

Have to say I find this whole thing quite bizarre. Clearly there have been incidents of ICE abusing their powers and detaining people who are not in the US illegally.

However, there also seem to be organised far-left groups who oppose any form of immigration control and are obstructing and attacking ICE agents.

Obama and Biden deported millions of illegals immigrants. Illegal immigration was a huge issue behind the election of Trump. I don’t think the actions of ICE or the far-left protesters are helpful.

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:30

showyourquality · 16/01/2026 14:54

They spent a good amount of time in our city. Carry some ID if you have an accent or skin color that would get you noticed.
Consider a whistle, can be useful in street collection situations.
Don’t go looking for trouble, if you want to help join a local group.
There were groups that shielded dc at school pick up for example. Other groups helped distribute legal information about excluding ice from businesses and signs relating to this.
Some provided legal advice.
What skills and knowledge does your dc have? Do they want to be actively involved?

Thank you for this. I was rushing in my initial post so might missed out some details.

DC is just out of law school and works as in-house counsel in a creative industry, but has done a lot of volunteering/legal clinics with some of the communities that are being targeted. I know they are quite tied into groups planning some specific helping strategies, similar to those you mentioned.

Skin colour white, very Anglo Saxon looking, and while I realise that makes them less of a target, I'm not counting on that being a free pass.

DC grew up partly in the US and partly in the UK, so knows the difference between policing cultures and is generally very sensible and level-headed. I've been pleased by how peaceful most of the protesting has been, but I do feel like the country is teetering on the edge of a powder keg at the moment and obviously would prefer they weren't caught up in it.

A whistle is a good idea. Thank you

OP posts:
Aplstrudl · 16/01/2026 17:30

Numerous sources provide evidence how Obama and Clinton and Biden removed more people than Trump has. Trump is just more vocal.

some of the - should I still go to USA - concerns are just odd.

Live your life by adhering to law and you should be okay, regardless of where you live or visit.

Itsmetheflamingo · 16/01/2026 17:35

Aplstrudl · 16/01/2026 17:30

Numerous sources provide evidence how Obama and Clinton and Biden removed more people than Trump has. Trump is just more vocal.

some of the - should I still go to USA - concerns are just odd.

Live your life by adhering to law and you should be okay, regardless of where you live or visit.

I don’t get why people say this. Immigration control is a competley normal function of government and has always happen. Of course Obama and Clinton and everyone else did it

the situation with ICE has clearly never happened before. Isn’t that obvious?!

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:41

Itsmetheflamingo · 16/01/2026 17:35

I don’t get why people say this. Immigration control is a competley normal function of government and has always happen. Of course Obama and Clinton and everyone else did it

the situation with ICE has clearly never happened before. Isn’t that obvious?!

Yes, I don't recall either of them sending poorly trained, heavily armed, masked militias out to assault 17 year olds, throw smoke bombs, blind protestors or cause cities to need to shut down schools.

OP posts:
Maddy70 · 16/01/2026 17:42

Leave the USA

hahagogomomo · 16/01/2026 17:46

My dd is dual national too, she is considering giving up her us citizenship and is refusing to file taxes. She is aware that she may not then be able to go there for leisure though for work isn’t an issue (complicated)

SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:49

Itsmetheflamingo · 16/01/2026 17:35

I don’t get why people say this. Immigration control is a competley normal function of government and has always happen. Of course Obama and Clinton and everyone else did it

the situation with ICE has clearly never happened before. Isn’t that obvious?!

There are many on the far left who oppose any form of immigration control, including deporting illegal inmigrants.

Itsmetheflamingo · 16/01/2026 17:51

SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:49

There are many on the far left who oppose any form of immigration control, including deporting illegal inmigrants.

But it how does that make it some kind of gotcha that Obama did it?

seems…. Simplistic

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:53

SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:49

There are many on the far left who oppose any form of immigration control, including deporting illegal inmigrants.

What does that have to do with anything?

OP posts:
SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:54

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:53

What does that have to do with anything?

Because there are groups of far left agitators attacking and impeding ICE agents, as they are opposed to any form of immigration enforcement.

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:57

SilkySquirrel · 16/01/2026 17:54

Because there are groups of far left agitators attacking and impeding ICE agents, as they are opposed to any form of immigration enforcement.

Ah, I see. So you have nothing useful to add in answer to my question, thanks. Have a nice night.

OP posts:
EmeraldRoulette · 16/01/2026 17:59

ByCyanMoose · 16/01/2026 17:02

What a delightful imagination you have! Are the paid protestors in the room with us now?

This is the second of this type of comment I've seen recently

Are you suggesting paid protestors don't exist? If you really believe that, then what would you think about other countries who have actually debated the issue in their respective Parliaments? Do you think it only happens in those countries?

There's a petition going on about it here in the UK. I can only think people who make these comments have never been to a protest - which is totally fair, probably most of the population have never been to a protest. But I am puzzled by the remark.

Is it just gaslighting? Like when a "Stand up to Racism" type gets annoyed with me because I don't fit their stereotype of someone with my skin colour?

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