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Original poster

To not want toys brought into the lounge?

464 replies

ohnononofenton · 15/01/2026 17:19

So in context, our downstairs area is all open plan. There’s a smallish lounge, a dining room and then an orangery. The children’s toys and games are in the orangery and their bedrooms.

They both but especially my five year old keep bringing them into the lounge. I hate it. It’s mostly because the lounge is on the small side so quickly gets full, toys get trampled on, end up under the sofa and the TV unit. I end up skidding on toy cars and parts of tool boxes all the time.

I am trying to be quite firm about keeping toys in the orangery or bedrooms. Or is this just too uptight? It’s an ongoing battle keeping the house fairly tidy and I don’t do a bad job but it is a lot of work.

OP posts:
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5
Tulipsriver · 16/01/2026 16:03

That sounds a bit joyless to me. I have small children so understand the mess they can cause, but it's their home too. Why wouldn't you want them to enjoy the communal space fully?

Mine choose to play in whatever room I'm in most of the time (which is lovely, I like that they enjoy us being together), it just wouldn't work to refuse to let them bring their toys in.

BauhausOfEliott · 16/01/2026 16:46

Bit shit to banish your kids to another room every time they want to play. You just need to teach them to tidy up.

When I was a kid toys were in a cupboard in the dining room, which was small and off the kitchen. But when my parents / siblings were in the lounge watching telly or whatever, I didn't have to sit in the dining room on my own if I wanted to play with my Lego or something and I think the average five-year-old would feel a bit lonely if they did.

But once it was bedtime or dinner time or whatever, it was 'Right, Bauhaus, you need to put all that back in the cupboard now' - so there were never bits of Lego or Action Man accessories or Spirograph stencils lying around getting trodden on.

My parents also had the rule that you had to put one thing away before you got something else out. I'm sure I used to moan about it when I was a kid but it must have worked because despite having two adults, three kids of varying ages and two dogs in a pretty small house, it was pretty tidy and not at all cluttered.

MartySupremeisascream · 16/01/2026 17:04

Aluna · 15/01/2026 23:23

It’s not about budget - an orangery could easily cost more than a brick extension, (dedicated orangery and conservatory makers such as David Salisbury, Westbury and Vale can be much more expensive than brick) - it’s about how much light people want and different types of garden room.

Show quote history

It's not about the kids either, it's about humble-bragging.

Jaspering · 16/01/2026 21:19

Makes you wonder what the dc do if they’re not allowed toys in the lounge.

OneOrTheOther · 16/01/2026 21:34

Jaspering · 16/01/2026 21:19

Makes you wonder what the dc do if they’re not allowed toys in the lounge.

play in the rooms they are allowed toys in…?

Jaspering · 16/01/2026 22:36

Separate from the family? Weird. It’s like saying no reading books or watching tv for adults in the lounge. Do that in your bedroom only.

loubielou31 · 16/01/2026 22:38

@ohnononofenton I have read a lot of the thread and I can't see anyone suggesting fewer toys. Put most of the toys away, in the garage or loft and only keep out 5-10 things, games and jigsaws included in this limit. Have a monthly refresh. This limits the amount of mess that can be made and a smaller selection can mean that things get played with rather than just moved around the house. And the novelty of the toy swap each month can be like getting brand new toys.
Bringing toys into the lounge is just what kids do and you are going to have to suck it up. I suspect it is warmer, (because orangery, conservatory, sun rooms are just cold, even the really decent ones) than the other room and probably has a more comfortable floor for playing on. But also I don't think I have ever known children play in the play room it's more of a storage area no matter how inviting and child friendly it is made to look.

WolfinSheepsDress · 16/01/2026 22:49

Play and imagination is the very opposite of order.
Kids need free flow play to let their ideas run uninterrupted.

We also have one living space

CopeNorth · 16/01/2026 22:53

ohnononofenton · 15/01/2026 17:19

So in context, our downstairs area is all open plan. There’s a smallish lounge, a dining room and then an orangery. The children’s toys and games are in the orangery and their bedrooms.

They both but especially my five year old keep bringing them into the lounge. I hate it. It’s mostly because the lounge is on the small side so quickly gets full, toys get trampled on, end up under the sofa and the TV unit. I end up skidding on toy cars and parts of tool boxes all the time.

I am trying to be quite firm about keeping toys in the orangery or bedrooms. Or is this just too uptight? It’s an ongoing battle keeping the house fairly tidy and I don’t do a bad job but it is a lot of work.

Op I bet your orangery is lovely and I’m sorry you got a hard time for no reason x

mathanxiety · 17/01/2026 05:39

BeverleyBrooks · 16/01/2026 07:44

My living room is generally clutter free - because I have teenagers now who are in their rooms or on screens or hanging out with friends. I do feel nostalgic for some of the toys, like the dolls house with all the tiny furniture! I loved that.

OP the toy phase is not for ever. I like a tidy house, but I also wanted my children to feel relaxed in their own home.

My solution was toy boxes / baskets (children’s toys should be robust enough to survive being put in a toy box, if they aren’t then they are not good quality, or not age appropriate).
I had a load of IKEA boxes for different types of toys eg a cars box, a dolly box, a train box, a basket for dolls house stuff, a food/kitchen box, an animals box, a musical instruments box, a dressing-up box etc.

We’d get out a few boxes each day, but not ALL the toys. That way it was easier to tidy as we would just chuck things into the right box, and they would get less bored of the toys, as they would be rotated. I would get them to do some token tidying so they had helped and I would quickly do the rest.

I can’t believe it takes you 2 hours to tidy a night - that’s crazy! I guess if you are putting everything exactly back - but be honest, does it really matter if a slice of toy pizza goes missing for a while under the sofa or bottom of the toy box? Are the children really bothered, does it honestly affect their play - or is it you that’s bothered?
And if they are asking for a specific toy that’s lost then that’s a good opportunity to get them to help tidy up and look for it. They learn consequences of actions.

But children should be allowed to play with toys freely in different ways, just because a toy is designed to be played with in a specific way doesn’t mean they will use it like that. Observe any nursery and by the end of the day the toys are usually mixed up!

Do you think your son is picking up on your stress about things being tidy and in the right places, and that’s why he’s so resistant to doing it? If he thinks he’s going to get it ‘wrong’ and has to find all the pieces or mummy won’t be happy, he is much less likely to want to do it.

But please relax and try to accept this is how kids of this age are, and it does not last. Think about other peoples’ houses you have visited on play dates. Which did you all enjoy visiting the most? (Both you and kids). The tidy one? Or the relaxed one?

An excellent post.

@ohnononofentonyou need to get to the bottom of your own issues here.

MartySupremeisascream · 17/01/2026 14:09

OneOrTheOther · 16/01/2026 21:34

play in the rooms they are allowed toys in…?

Show quote history

It's too cold in the extension coz it has a glass roof and it's winter.
Be kind.
To the children.

Superhansrantowindsor · 17/01/2026 14:13

It’s their home too. Just get a huge toy box and get them to chuck everything into it at night. And in twenty years you’ll miss the random bits of LEGO and dolly’s shoes or whatever as you look at your tidy but empty nest.

HoorayHattie · 17/01/2026 14:54

OP - I really can't understand why it's taking you SO long to tidy your DS's toys?

I can tidy away the toys from our church creche in 10-15 minutes. I pick up an empty basket and walk around the church, collecting up all the toys that have been scattered, hidden under pews etc. Then I take the basket back to the play area at the back of the church, put all the books back on the bookshelf, crayons, colouring books & peg puzzles also on the bookshelf, soft toys in one basket, duplo in another, Noah's ark in yet another basket, cars and vehicles in a box next to the road mat and everything else in the remaining basket. Job done!

That's 8 - 10 toddlers, scattering toys in a much larger area than your house . . .

(and I'm retired and suffering from arthritis)

dreamiesformolly · 17/01/2026 16:42

Superhansrantowindsor · 17/01/2026 14:13

It’s their home too. Just get a huge toy box and get them to chuck everything into it at night. And in twenty years you’ll miss the random bits of LEGO and dolly’s shoes or whatever as you look at your tidy but empty nest.

Exactly what I was thinking! It’s crazy expecting your home to be tidy all the time when you have small children.

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