10 yr old son expelled from school today

[Edinburghschool2026]

This isn't a aibu but wanted the traffic.

My ds10 was expelled from school today. We are in Edinburgh and it's a state school. Could anyone with experience with Edinburgh Council explain how serious this is? Also What options there is.

Thank you

I used expelled as its always was the word used when I was a school for others. I posted tonight as apart from the professionals involved no-one else knows what happened. Me and dh are feeling pretty low tonight.

That must be stressful and worrying for you .
What led to your DS expulsion ?
How does your DS feel about the situation?
Is there a strategy or some plan for your DS returning to school?

Yes, many people use that term.

I'm sorry that I can't give you clearer information: I don't know anyone who works in your area. I wonder whether this group might be able to give you information about what might be open to you?

www.edinburgh.gov.uk/additional-support-needs/parent-peer-support-groups

Oh absolutely, for support or for others in the situation (although there is debate about exclusion in Scotland)

I'm referring to the specific q's the OP asked. Again, surely the school are the people to ask those q's of? On here you're quite likely to get a whole load of well meant but inaccurate info. If OP needs facts ask the people in charge who have the facts.

I’m sorry OP. I have no suggestions but wanted to just say I understand and whilst it feels like a total gut punch today you will find a way forward and it will be better for him

Do three of your four children have SEN? That is tough going OP

Apart from the legal term for that being suspension again (for the last five years), the LA requirement in England is to provide alternative education is from the 6th day of a suspension or permanent exclusion and that any suspension or exclusion is judged to be legal upon more than whether a child is a danger or not, I do agree with you that the school taking this course in accordance with Scottish Law is likely to be helpful in the end, as it increases the likelihood of him accessing appropriate education for his needs.

This must be such a worry. It happened years ago to the ds of a friend. He was 15. He went onto a college that understood and could manage his needs far better than school. He is grown up now, and doing well. He hasn't been out of work since the time he finished education. They are very proud of him. At the time it seemed cataclysmic, but it worked out ok. I hope the same happens to you.

I’m also from Scotland and expelled means to me permanent, suspended means a certain amount of days then back.

what do you mean all the professionals know but know one else, are you saying you don’t know why he’s been suspended?

for the non teachers here , people say suspended now not fixed term excluded - we're back to where we were

@itsgettingweird you're out of date

I am not OP but thanks. Possibly all four have SEN but by the youngest we were getting in our stride! 🙈

When you say “possibly all four ” - some have diagnosis but others don’t?

try not to feel low, the SEN provision is really bad such that schools have to exclude kids to “prove” they need a special SEN school. It will help your DS get the right school for his needs. It’s not a judgement on him or your parenting, it is purely about ticking boxes so the council are forced to find him a specialist school. The alternative is he sits in isolation like a convict in solitary while the council insists he can’t really need a specialist SEN school because he goes to a mainstream school every day.

He's not be expelled as expulsion is permanent.

I understand this is difficult for you op but it must be very serious to have gotten to this point and the school have a duty to keep other children safe too. I presume there's been an incident that has caused harm or risked harm to other children or staff, or your son.

Ask to meet with the school and the local authority and plan next steps for how they will support your child into an appropriate school placement. Perhaps get some specialist legal advice too.

Yes, we have struggled to get CAMHs or anyone beyond our GP interested. I think we do too good a job of looking like we are coping when we should have let things fall apart. Instead, we just change schools every couple of years and live in a prison of our own making.

It sounds as though she might also, understandably, be looking for a little solace.

And trust me, we have asked for help, begged for it, but always told there isn't enough money.

I have no idea how there are so many ASD / ADHD people in the world when we have been denied the opportunity for an assessment at every turn, when our kids' teachers say they are way worse and more symptomatic than kids with diagnoses.

Agree.

You can download the figures here. https://www.gov.scot/publications/school-exclusion-statistics/

2002-2003 - 292 children "removed from register" which means permanent exclusion, or expulsion.

2022-23 - 1 child.
2024-25 - 0 children.

Children in Scotland are not expelled, certainly not 10 year olds in P5 or P6. Something else is going on here.

Because posting on Scotsnet will get replies from parents (and teachers) who understand the Scottish system, provision for ASN children, the role of local authorities, etc etc etc.

Posting on AIBU will get a lot of well-intentioned but ill-informed people posting from an English/Welsh perspective, not realising everything up here education related is completely different.

If you’re waiting for a specialist setting OP then these suspensions will go in your favour. I imagine the school are saying they cannot meet need-which is also a positive. It’s hard but it shows that mainstream isn’t working for him.

To get excluded in Scotland he must have done something outrageously bad. They hardly exclude anybody, much to the detriment of the other children who aren't violent and disruptive.

I had to sit on a Permanent Exclusion Panel last year for a child who simply didn't belong in mainstream. A bit like your story, the school had done everything it reasonably could (and more) to support the child and keep the child at the school but staff were getting hurt, and we couldn't keep either the child or the staff safe in the setting.

It felt like a sad story to be part of this process, but it adds weight to the child's documented needs, and is hopefully taken into account when weighing up need for special school places.

This is not your fault or your child's fault. It is a sadly necessary step of his journey to find a setting where he will thrive.

Are you always so bloody rude?

I gave an example of what woukd happen in a school in England as some if it might help her.

@Edinburghschool2026 did the school offer you any guidance at all? If not speak.to the ehad or whoever is responsible for the management of SEND support as they would be the ones best placed to help and guide you.

Absolutely. Even suspending a pupil is frowned upon.