Friend ordered something from business and hasn’t paid

[SmallWorrier]

This is a really awkward situation! I recently started my own business where I sell goods that I’ve made. Im lucky it took off quickly and am managing to make it work so far. I mostly sell to strangers as I knew I’d struggle to sell and take money from friends if they ordered. These items are for children.

a couple of friends have ordered for their children and I’ve always sold them much lower than I would to strangers, not making a profit but breaking even on materials. A friend asked about ordering 3 items for her daughter for Christmas, which would usually have come to £30. I told her £10 would be ok. She took the items and her daughter got them for Christmas and has been wearing them however she didn’t pay for them. At the time I offered bank details and she said she’d pay cash. I’ve seen her a few times and last time I mentioned her daughter looked nice in what I’d made and her reply was “oh I’ll pay you at some point.” The woman is usually complaining about being skint however books nice holidays etc. I feel awkward but frustrated as I did them at a cheap price anyway and taking on her order before Christmas meant I couldn’t take on as many other ones (I only take so many a month to make sure they get done in good time and I don’t overwhelm myself). This is the reason I don’t want to take orders from friends!! I’ve asked a couple of times now with no reply. I don’t want to lose the friendship or people think ill of me by pushing it, especially in our small community. WIBU to ask again for the money or should I just let it go?

Never offer discount to "friends" because real friends dont want to screw you over and would want you to prosper. This person isnt a friend, dont offer discounts to people you wouldn't just give the money too in different circumstances. Dont let it go, make the CF pay, she knows its due.

I am in the process of buying a business and already some of the few people who know about it have hinted at wanting something for free or expecting a discount from me, it blows my mind. I think anyone who asks for a discount or something for free isn’t a friend. I wouldn’t dream of doing this. I get my nails and eyebrows done by a friend and I pay her more than she charges, I want her to do well and I’ll try and help any way I can by paying over her pricing because I think she’s worth more and I want to support her.

I would leave it and not mention it at this point but I wouldn’t do anything without a payment again, for anyone.

I wouldn't ask again, but I'd also step back from the friendship.

Just send a message ‘hi, just sorting out my accounts for end of 2025 and wondering if you could pay me what you owe so I’m all sorted. Bank details xxxx thanks ‘

Only because you don’t want it to affect your small community and it’s such a small amount, I’d let it go and learn the lesson.

However if it weren’t for the local community aspect I would absolutely not let it drop - even though it’s £10, it’s the principle. I’d be sending her polite text reminders every couple of days until she paid.

OP,you say you feel awkward asking her for the cash. She clearly doesn't feel awkward stealing from you. Because that's what it amounts to. I'd let it go, and let her go too.

You say you don't want to lose a friendship, but to be blunt she isn't your friend. If she was, she would have paid you and not put you in this position. She knows she should pay you and has chosen not to.

Going slightly against the grain but I would text this:
”Friend, I gave you a really good deal of £10 instead of the normal price of £30. I would appreciate it if you could pay me for the ‘goods’ as you have now had over xx days credit which would not be my usual business terms.”
or words to that effect.
And never sell off-site again. You should set up a mates rates code for whatever value you want, that they enter on your site but they still have to cough up.

Their is no friendship to lose. She is not your friend. She doesn't respect you or even like you. She is using you.

Don’t give discounts to friends for a start.
Send her an email/text saying you are balancing the books and need her payment. Keep it professional - don’t apologise for asking. And don’t sell again unless you get payment up front!

Tell her she’s taking advantage of your friendship - and the absolute piss. Send her a collections notice.

You tell her you are balancing your books for the tax year end and you want payment - £10 or £110 a deal was made.
Be firm and tell her.

Send her a payment link and send a standard style message

“Hi X, thanks again for ordering from my small business, it’s so appreciated! I’m wrapping up all my final payments for pre Christmas purchases before the end of Jan so please can you transfer £10 to the below link, many thanks”

Going forward I would say you have a set discount of say 20% off for friends and leave it at that. If they don’t like that discount they dont have to get it. I would also ask for payment the day they receive their item,
no excuses.

Can’t stand when people “forget” about money they owe! You deserve to be paid for your time.

"Hi CF, I don't like having to ask again but I like even less that you have put me in the position that I have to ask again: your invoice for the mates rates discounted item (£10) is overdue. I thank you for your attention to this matter."

My youngest dd has a bagel shop. She gets up at 4am everyday to freshly bake the bagels. When me & dh buy any we pay what is on the menu board. She has offered family discount but we refuse as we know how bloody hard she works. If you want to give a small discount to trusted friends do so but make sure you still have a small profit. Good luck with your business x

It is not only £10 its the £10 matetials and the loss of a full value sale for £30. The mate rate is materials your time cost and lost profit and you devalue your "brand" by giving such a big discount as she is not worried "about £10".
You lost the materials cost and will have to earn that back from your next sales.

But it is a business lesson that you need to be a bank transfer business with the cash transferred over before you hand over the goods

If you’re going to be any social situations, like out for drinks, I’d turn to her and say ‘I’ll let you cover this as you owe me’. Can’t believe the cheek of some people. I’d rather die than rip anyone off for a tenner let alone a friend!

Let it go for now, but next time you're out with her and it comes to paying the bill, breezily say: "Oh [friend], you'll cover my 10 from the items you bought at Christmas, right?!" And walk away/don't give her a chance to refuse. Saying it in front of other friends would help too.

I am going to do this one actually x

Yes last time I saw her we were having coffee. I felt like asking her to get my coffee as she hadn’t paid me 😂

YABU to offer discounts etc to to friends as they absolutely will take it as an excuse to take you for granted.

Keep badgering her for money and going forward treat them exactly the same as any other customer.

No more mates rates! They can pay the going rate like everyone else! I told my partner that if he ever opens his own business, he absolutely isn't giving his mates any special deals, as that would mean he'd make a loss.

You may have to write this one off, but I'd be writing off the friendship too! She should be supporting you, not taking advantage.

Charge her 30£.

"Will you send the money over this week, or should I issue a standard invoice? It would be a full price though that way."

My accountant has advised me to make sure I collect all debts.. so pay up.

She's a twat. £10 for her to puss off is a good lesson.

For a tenner I’d let it go. But I would never do anything for her again and if she asks you to do anything I would happily say ‘I can’t afford mates rates anymore, so you’ll have to pay the going rate and I need money upfront, because I was quite out of pocket on your last order.’

I’d just steer clear for a bit, she’ll get the message and know why you’re pissy.

I would tell all your friends ‘Sorry I can’t do mates rates anymore - as I’ve been stung.’