to want people to stop buying my baby son clothes because I love dressing him myself

[flipendo1993]

I know I’ll be called shallow, but I get so much joy from dressing DS. I have a style I love for him and spend ages on Vinted bargain hunting brands I love but don’t want to spend on new, and I love looking at baby/toddler fashion sites on Instagram for inspiration. I’m very aware he’ll have his own opinions soon which is why I’m enjoying it for now. But my mum and MIL also buy him lots of clothes, and I honestly don’t like any of them. I did a count when sorting what fits today and over half of his clothes are gifts I don’t like. I put him in their outfits when we’re together, but otherwise they’re unworn. I’ve made comments before when thanking them that his wardrobe is bursting, but they’re not taking the hint and I don’t want to be rude to them. My mum arrived today with a bag of clothes from Sainsbury’s and I don’t like any of them and I feel frustrated that I have even more clothes to deal with that I don’t want and didn’t ask for. I know I’ll be called ungrateful but AIBU to be privately annoyed instead of grateful for these clothes.

And actually a not so new one. I see loads of these threads where stashing things in a bottom drawer seems to be too much for people to cope with.

You are right: its about the " You read the script and play the part we give you if you want to approach our little family" attitude.

Mr Men books are classic ? Formulaic, sexist, badly written and boring yes, but classic?

And stop dressing him in clothes you don't like for them. Just donate it all. You've been grateful they are now going overboard and putting him in what they buy is encouraging them

Bright colours, fun prints, childlike, unisex inc. bits from the girls section. Clothes that look cute and don’t just have an ugly tractor slapped on it. I’m not totally opposed to cars, we have this car cardigan which is adorable because it’s not just a dull coloured t shirt with an ugly stock image in the middle. I also like to avoid predators because I find the whole predators for boys and prey for girls is alarming. He’s got the rest of his life to wear dark jeans and jogger, so we’re embracing the few years it’s ok to wear ducky trousers. I’ve grabbed some screenshots which will probably take a while to show up. I’m sure some people will hate it, and that’s fine but seeing him it his lovely bright patterned clothes genuinely makes so happy

Perhaps your mum and MIL hate your style and this is their gentle hint 😂😂😂

Do you have a family Whattsapp group? Get AI to write a kind and polite post saying enough is enough! I hated seeing my babies in clothing that was not of my choosing. Like when I picked them up from in laws..it didn’t feel like my baby at all! It’s a weird feeling x

This is not really a worrying problem to have. Just TELL them thank you but he has enough clothes and I don't want you to waste your money so please return them. If they carry on just sell them on Vinted.

It’s not that I want or need them to spend their money on my baby, but it’s true I don’t want them to waste their money. I’d be happier if they spent on something they loved for themselves though. I don’t need it spending on my baby.

I had three boys and loved looking for the needle in haystack lovely clothing!

I understand your point.

Child clothing is everywhere in abundance and many people are in position that they can afford it.

The donors aren't helping in any way, they are just spending money and hopefully feeling good about themselves while doing it, which is offset by the stress it causes you.

People need to buy less in general, and pointless baby clothing isn't an exception.

Take the bag to the charity shop with no guilt. If it’s a whole bag of things it’s unlikely your MIL will remember and ask about individual items, and this way they can be bought by someone who wants them.

This thread is the perfect illustration of making a mountain out of a mole hill. You are treating your poor son like a fashion accessory. It gave me immense pleasure to see how happy my MIL was to have a GDD. Why not try and enjoy the fact that your DM dotes on your child instead of making it all about you?

Years later, I still remember a pair of pyjamas my MIL gave her which I would never have bought in a million years - a particularly awful shade of pink, synthetic fabric, and princesses all over the top. We have a photo of DD in them happily emerging from a tent. She loved them. MIL is dead.

I agree. You don't need to dress him all the time in the grandmas' clothes but surely no harm to put him in them for at least some of the time, rather than chucking them straight to the charity shop?

My mil bought a lot of stuff for the dcs, it gave her pleasure. Mum also did.

And its a relatively short time really that the parents and in laws were healthy enough to be that involved (one has passed away).

I get it, i was the same with mine, I don't like character clothing (i relent once they develop interests) which is popular in supermarkets, and my taste is more alternative than my family. Luckily they didn't do loads of clothes buying for us!

I would just look at any gifted clothes as 'vinted funds' though. Take a pic to send to the gifter then pop it on vinted as NWT, tada! Funds for what you actually want 😁

Op you will very likely have a little boy in a year or two who LOVES diggers, dinosaurs etc - are you going to make him one of those ‘sad beige children’ who can’t choose anything for himself because it doesn’t fit with your aesthetic? Despite what you see on Vinted children don’t actually LIKE being dressed in muted, tasteful Sylvanian family-wear.

I assume you haven’t read my posts. I’ve said I prefer bright colours and fun prints. Literally the opposite of sad and beige. And in my OP I said that I’m very aware he’ll grow to have his own opinions on clothes which is why I’m making the most of the time he doesn’t care.

You have reminded me of a member of my extended family whose baby DD was my smallest bridesmaid, invited so she wouldn't feel left out. The baby (and child) wore one colour only, and only cotton, and stuck absolutely to that rule at the wedding. All the other bridesmaids wore the little silk and tulle dresses I had had made for them, in a different colour to match the flowers. Just as well I wasn't a control freak about the photos 😄