Would you inform the school?

[Winterstorms2]

My friend recently got into an argument with her friend. The argument started off as a conversation which quickly turned into an argument, (my friends friend accusing her of things, name calling her etc) in the end my friend was spat at. She was horrified but does not want to do anything about it. My friend’s “friend” is a teacher. AIBU to think my friend should inform the school of this behaviour? Im tempted to do so myself! Our children both attend the school she teaches at. What would you feelings be?

Good lord. Teachers are people. They are varied, like the rest of the population. Some of them aren't that nice. Some of them get up to all kinds of things outside of school! There already aren't nearly enough teachers. If you're holding out for all teachers to be morally irreproachable, I'm afraid you're being wildly unrealistic.

The woman sounds grim, but that doesn't necessarily mean she's incapable of being professional at work.

I agree it’s relevant that the teacher in question has spat on a parent of a child at the school she works in! I worked in schools for years and disagree with people who think headteacher would shrug this off, they might not be able to share any action they take but I do not think any of the headteachers I worked with would think it was ok for a teacher to spit on a parent of a child at the school, even out of work. And teacher’s actions outside of work defo can get them in trouble at work! Teachers know that.

Well given that my friend didn't assault anyone ….

Thank you, I was starting to think I was crazy to think like this! I was thinking well im obviously an old trouble maker who should allow teachers to go around spitting!

You weren't there. Only have your friends version. Mind your own business.

I suppose im old fashioned to think that teachers should hold a certain conduct i side and out of the work place

The person who was actually assaulted, doesn’t want to do anything about it. Why?
The people who actually witnessed it , don’t want to do anything about it. Why?

You, who weren’t involved, want to report her to her employer. Why?

You weren’t there
You only have one version of events.

Doesn’t it make you wonder why your friend doesn’t want to report it herself?

@Winterstorms2 were you there. Did you witness any of it?

Because if not you hav your friends biased account

agree that it’s suspicious your friend who is making allegations doesn’t want to do anything..

Is your friends child in the teachers class?

Your friend doesn’t want to report it. So why do you? You weren’t there. You have no idea what actually happened. Why are you so bothered with involving yourself?

There are teachers out there with such little impulse control that they're lashing out in a physical way by spitting on people? Good to know.

I think if you weren't there andnshe didn't spit at you then you have no place reporting her to anyone. It' just heresay. If she had spat at you then you would be justified in reporting it to the police should you wish and teachers are contractually obliged to inform their employer about any dealings with the police.

I'm a teacher and they should. Part of the Standards is that they shouldn't bring the profession into disrepute.

There is an actual problem here. A teacher shouldn't be spitting on the parent of a child who attends the school where they teach.

But there's also another issue, i.e. around the desired outcome. What does the OP hope to achieve? Who will this achievement benefit? Why do they believe this is a matter of public interest? Arguably, contacting the employer to get someone into trouble about something they did in their private life could also be a criminal offence. It might fall under harassment or a form of malicious communication.

As you didn't witness it, all you can say is "I've been told that..."

Unless someone who did witness it reports it, the head is unlikely to be able to do much about it.

Do you dislike the teacher @Winterstorms2 ?

She feels that she cannot because the person doing the spitting is a teacher and feels that there would be no point that she would be laughed at and the head teacher would protect the teacher, which is really sad to read here that it is a possible outcome …i wanted to show her that she would be doing the right thing, but it seems not.

But what do you want the Head to do? What outcomes are you expecting?
Why not report her to the police?

Does she want you to report it? Why did their argument escalate?

I didnt , until she spat, i guess I’m just disgusted… who does that?

I was going to say the same.

What was the argument about?
Can you expand on it? Give both sides?
What did your friend do/say to make the teacher behave as they did?
You didnt witness it, you dont know the full story, and your friend doesnt wish to take it further (maybe she behaved just as badly?)
Its nothing to do with you so keep your beak out of it

It is old-fashioned, yes. It's hard enough to persuade people to be teachers anyway. Holding them to higher standards of behaviour in their private lives than other people, just because they've chosen a particular job, is not exactly going to help. It's a job, not a sainthood.

Hmm…having the ability not to assault another person hardly makes you a saint…

But you only have your friends version. Do notbing