Dh won’t ice skate

[Alwayseatingpringles]

Dd, 7 desperate to go ice skating (has only done it when little on a kids ice rink, holding onto one of the penguin things.
Now she’s a little older, there’s a bigger rink nearby at Christmas. She always asks Dh to go with her and he says no.
i do so many things with Dd, I don’t want to
ice skate, but I feel bad for Dd
Should she try on her own and we watch? I know she would probably need help, all I see is dads helping their kids

Would your Dh do it?

Aibu?

Yea because being a martyr and getting seriously injured isn’t being the cool parent either

...which is why i said DH should take her for lessons rather than just chucking her on the ice if he can't skate himself.

But if the kid is desperate to give it a go, then he can get off his arse and take her, can't he.

So you 'feel bad' for your DD... Just not bad enough to want to take her yourself!? Presumably, your DH isn't keen for the self-same reasons...

I bought my son's ice skates and took them to the rink...they then just taught themselves

So take her then!! Not doing so because you 'do all the other activities', isn't enough of a reason unfortunately. If you feel that bad/sad for your DD, seems like a no-brainer.

If he can’t ice skate confidently then it’s absolutely pointless. You haven’t told us if he can actually ice skate confidently

No, he wouldn't as he can't skate.

I love it and bring the children every year.

Can he ice skate?
A person who can not ice skate, taking a child to learn ice skating would be a pointless and dangerously stupid plan anyway.
At best, no fun as you wobble round holding onto the sides. At worst a broken bone or other injury.
My dad can ice skate and took me and my sister when we were about 8 and 10 and we did end up in a and e that day. This was even after me and my sister had lessons and we could all skate to a reasonable level.

I think getting her lessons sounds the best way.

But he should be doing some activities with her.

I'm so glad the voting agrees with me because honestly, I would rather tandem jump from a plane than do this.

I can't skate at all, and I really hate ice. Not a chance would I do this for any reason, no matter how much I love my nonexistent child .

No chance would i do this or expect another adult too, there is a million activities thet can be done so no need for this one

I dunno. Are there no group sessions at all?
I was a mad keen roller skater for a few years as a kid, where a mob of children took over a big dancehall on a Saturday and skated round in a huge loop, round and round, on ancient clattering skates you’d borrow for about sixpence.
I’m cudgelling my brain to recall my parents ever taking me to some activity of this nature.
I mean we’d sometimes go the flicks as a family (eg when The Sound of Music or Born Free came out) but even there, more often I’d just be at Saturday morning pictures with a gang of kids of various ages. Everyone made their way to the cinema by themselves; no lifts.
Theatre was on the list (handily we lived near Stratford in Avon) but all I can recall about the rest of the time is just hanging out with other kids.
There was lots of adventuring; roaming around fields and hills, through secret underground passages and all that. Playing in each others’ houses and out in all the lanes.
Cycling in a very junior fashion too, and the open air swimming pool every day in Summer ….all rather Enid Blyton really.
(God we even set up a secret club, in the branches of a big tree. With badges! 🤣)
I seem to recall a very fluid and populous amorphous community of pals from all the nearby primary schools all the time, in which smaller groups would coalesce for something, then dissolve and another would form for a new venture.
(The secret club was just four of us ex-Brownies, not the mixed sex ‘rural explorers’, for example! )

But blimey, I don't think any parents ever got a look in!
But what has turned this all into ancient history, that parents now must have a part in kids’ free time?
(Not a serious question; just idly thinking back. Safety? You'd have thought our numbers would be a protection.)
Well anyway. I’d quite forgotten my generally very happy and free childhood. Ta very much, OP.

BTW I hope they find an ice skating enthusiast for the girl, as I’ve every sympathy with her father.

Book her into an individual or group ice skating lesson. Done!

I go with mine because my dh doesn't/can't - he just watches - but he's missing out as its great fun, just swap out a different child actvity for him to do instead of you

Oh I am surprised they don't teach ice skating in school in Canada, considering how popular hockey is. In Finland it's on the curriculum and everyone has lessons every single school year, same as swimming. Also cross country skiing but that's more weather dependent so can't always be done.

Well. I take my DS and his friend ice skating every couple of months and we all enjoy it as competent skaters. Not exactly Torvill and Dean, but we move around well with occasional moments of grace.
Only complaint is the blisters from the boots.
After this thread I feel like a reckless middle aged woman who should be fretting about fractured skulls and sliced fingers.

He can do swimming

If people love to skate I have no issues. I love skating and will probably still skate again once my broken arm is healed. But the pain I am in and the difficulties I will face for the next few months mean it isn't something I would push someone else to do it they were reluctant

I’m all for doing things you’d rather not do for your kids. Especially when it comes to physical activity. However ice skating is the one thing I absolutely refuse to do. Ice is SLIPPERY, ice is HARD. A bruised coccyx is not fun. Ask me how I know.

If you fall, you tend to fall quickly, and you fall hard. I ski with my kids, I did most of my learning when they did. I’m an average skier at best, yes there’s a risk, but I feel that I can mitigate it in a way I can’t with ice skating.

Why should dh go if you don’t want to?

The last time I went with DD I was around 40 and I fell on my arse and hurt my coccyx- never been since - but I went ice-skating a lot as a teen and even had lessons so I wasn’t a total novice.

Never would’ve expected my parents to come with (I was about 8 when I first went - was on holiday and another girl came on the ice with me, not my DPs!).

Not sure if OP will return to this considering everyone is saying he shouldn't have to go, but when she says she does all activities I was wondering whether that meant actually joining in and what these activities are.
She seems to want DH to actually do the ice skating, which isn't really a fair comparison complaining she does all the activities if it turns out she just drops DD at gymnastics for an hour where she either watches/does something else in that time or goes home and returns at the end of the class. Or if one of the activities she is so busy doing with DD is things like shopping, cinema, going for a hot chocolate and cake this again doesn't really compare in the same way as the ice skating.

If it’s any help to OP (and if she’s still there) I used to often often delegate swimming to DH when kids were young. Love swimming but swimming with young kids is a different matter. They seemed to enjoy being manhandled in the water, playing sharks etc and then having a hot choc after.
I can also recommend roller skating as a lower stakes activity - we went every Sunday for one winter when it rained/snowed every weekend. The kids got quite confident. So this might be something that DH could take on and DD could see if she’s a skating fan?

Ice skating really doesn't worry me, its not so dangerous if you wear a helmet and gloves. My son plays ice hockey in the under 8s team and falls all the time but doesn't get hurt at all (has all the padding) he throws himself on the ice for fun
I only get a bit worried when I'm skating on the lake and I can hear the ice cracking (deep cracks as the temperatures start to warm, not visible cracks breaking the ice) but also its a beautiful eerie sound so I kinda like it too, but I won't let the kids skate on the lake at that point.

On a LAKE?? Where do you live, in the US? I love the way that ice hockey is considered mainstream sport - it’s such a superb game to watch.

Finland. We even have roads on the lakes in winter.
I do love watching ice hockey, its so much fun and fast paced - no time to get bored, and its adorable when its the under 8s as they're so little.