Embarrassed to be English

[Traballi]

Got ancestry results back recently and apparently I'm 98% English, tiny bit of Irish but not even Scottish or Welsh. It wasn't a surprise as already looked into family history and been here for centuries.

I'm actually embarrassed of my English lineage to be honest. What's there to be proud of with our appalling history of colonialism and more recent dallyings with the far right and flag shagging?

I see the British flag up where I live and I honestly cringe. I'm also married to someone who is from a country we have a history of conflict with too so that doesnt help although DH doesnt hate us excessively (won't name country in case outing but with our history of wars/ conflict/ invasion, it could be dozens of places lets be frank)

I guess I've had a different perspective on Englishness over many years through the people I know from overseas and I speak other languages too. I also went to a Catholic school (in England) which taught us about slavery and what happened in Northern Ireland. None of which was nice about the English (teacher was Irish). I'm grateful for these perspectives though as I wouldn't want to be brainwashed into being a blind patriot.

I have friends with strong Irish and Welsh roots and they have a real sense of identity to hold onto with it, ancestral languages that they're interested in and a feeling a pride.

If you're English, it's hard to feel like that unless you're in Tommy or Nige's crew, which makes me even less inclined towards patriotism tbh.

Does anyone else feel like this? It's a bit sad really. I'd love to at least be half something else to cling to that identity instead and ignore the English but.

Luckily my DC is only half English and has two other nationalities through DH, and is being brought up in Wales so will probably feel more Welsh. I'm also obtaining a passport from another country through DH soon and I'll be using that for all overseas travel as soon as I can so I can appear to be from there instead.

AiBU or do others feel like this? Being English just isn't cool.

Yes, because resorting to lazy stereotypes like the English being cold and unemotional is what Farage and his ilk play on. I thought thinking people tend to avoid doing that.

She did. She even put it in quotes as if to show an example of what unashamed people say

I dont think that I have written - that I am embarrassed for anyone to say that they are anything.

That was maybe the OP, who wrote that

I wrote that I feel bad about what my ancestors did in the past.

I am starting to think that there is something a bit wrong with you. Your comprehension skills are shocking.

Oh my god, it wasn’t an example. It was literally just ‘I think it’s more normal to not like colonialism than to think it was great’. It’s you who has decided she likes rape for some reason. It’s so interesting how selective you are with your replies and comments. You asked me why I wasn’t focussed on helping the women of Ireland for the recent wrongs (as if the troubles in NI weren’t recent too), and when I explained what I had done you completely ignored it. You’re cherry picking parts of people’s comments to suit your own narrative.

Hang on - 3 hours ago you said
I also feel embarassed when people write on here
"Im so lucky to live in England. It is such a great country".

Now you say
I don't think that we need to be embarrassed to be English OP

Mate pick a side. We can go back and read you know

There’s a difference between being English and living in England

I'm English. My family tree shows farm workers who had awful conditions. One of them was described as an agitator as he was trying to get unions involved for farm workers. He was frequently sacked for this agitation meaning the tied accommodation (often absolute hovels) had to be left and new work found.

You did.

In your first post you said

I also feel embarassed when people write on here
"Im so lucky to live in England. It is such a great country".

Memory not your strong point?

Indeed

Not just Western! Every country has done it, including those that no longer exist because another country did it to them harder.

I'm saying country but, in fact, most historical nations were more like tribal or cultural occupations - national boundaries are a recent invention. This underlies the reasons for various groups trying to colonise, overwhelm or kill each other within the same country. Or, erm, neighbouring countries like Israel & Palestine.

Welcome to human nature and geopolitics!

Do enlighten me to what you meant then.

Though whether it can be relied upon, who knows. You seem to change your opinions a lot

Im not on a "side".

You quoted two things that i wrote. Neither sentence you put there, contradicts the other. I stand by both sentences.

You are not making sense. Again....

Um I didn’t say she “likes rape”

She literslly claimed those unashamed to be English are happy with people having been raped

are you quite well?

Are you going to reply to this

@DontFallInTheHaHa .

It is a post written to you

Colonialism is now interchangeable with rape? You sound quite unhinged tbh

@DontFallInTheHaHa I see that you haven't replied to the other poster who is calling out your bad behaviour.

I wonder why...

So it isn’t embarrassing to be born English but it’s embarrassing to migrate and like it here? Okay 👍

She didn’t say that. She said that she thinks it’s more normal to be ashamed of our ancestors raping and pillaging than to be happy about it. Your comprehension skills are appalling. And colonialism does usually involve rape FYI

Are you going to reply to literally any question, or respond to the fact you’ve changed your tune on being embarrassed for people proud to be English (then gaslighted me into saying you never said that, even though we can all see it)

Why are you ignoring the poster who is pointing out all of your bullshit.?