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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Comments at Christmas cause I choose to carry on riding whilst pregnant

238 replies

Pladii · 30/12/2025 16:31

In my early 20s I found horse riding. The routine, being out in nature, forming a bond with animals does my mental health absolute wonders.

I am newly pregnant. Just beginning to show and have decided I will continue riding my boy who is an absolute gentleman. We adore one another and I trust him.

We went to stay with my husband’s side for Christmas. And it got brought up over the actual main meal! I was mortified! Granny begged me not to. And my sister in law said “it’s just not worth the risk”. She doesn’t understand why I’m chancing it. MIL kept quiet (not like her).

I am only accepting a level of risk that I am comfortable with. I wouldn’t dare a ride a horse I didn’t know.

It’s my body. I think it’s a bit rubbish for my decision to be questioned so publicly. Made me feel like I am doing something wrong.

Dh and I are doctors. I’ve made a decision as an adult woman. That should be it.

OP posts:
catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:33

You do you, but I certainly wouldn't be doing a risky sport

catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:34

My in laws said that they were safe on motorbikes until somebody else decided to drive into them.

Kayoh · 30/12/2025 16:34

YANBU but welcome to a lifetime of motherhood where every other decision you make is scrutinised and judged. I recommend you develop a thick skin and practice politely but firmly stating your decisions so everyone knows they are a done deal.

Original poster
Pladii · 30/12/2025 16:35

I only ride my horse in a highly controlled environment. Not riding on public roads

OP posts:
catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:37

Pladii · 30/12/2025 16:35

I only ride my horse in a highly controlled environment. Not riding on public roads

Well carry on then If you want to, I can't see the point of the thread

ShesTheAlbatross · 30/12/2025 16:37

I think if you’re an experienced rider with a horse you know that probably reduces the risk from the level for an average woman, which is probably what the general advice of various medical bodies to avoid it is based on.

I wouldn’t have done it. That doesn’t mean you are wrong. And I certainly wouldn’t tell you not to if you were my relative/friend.

Illbefinejustbloodyfine · 30/12/2025 16:37

Yanbu OP. I say that as someone who chose NOT to ride during pregnancy. The horse i had at the rime was not a saint, and i was 37. So totally different circs. Had i been pregnant in my 20s, with the horse i had in my 20s, i absolutely would have carried on.

TeaDrinkings · 30/12/2025 16:37

Carry on and ignore the "advice". Us horse owners have good core strength generally, as you know.
You know your body and your horse. You know not to take unnecessary risks where you are more likely to fall. It is always controversial amongst those who don't understand horses and horse ownership. I have known people ride at almost 9 months. Only stopped because they struggled to mount!

MaJoady · 30/12/2025 16:38

catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:33

You do you, but I certainly wouldn't be doing a risky sport

And here comes another one to layer on the judgement!

I rode until I was 19 weeks pregnant. Very trusted horse, only in the school and no jumping were my personal rules. I'm fact the motion of a horse walking did wonders for the pain and stiffness in my hips and back. I stopped when I stopped feeling my core being effective.

In my experience, most horse riders ride in early pregnancy and it always non-riders who aren't able to calculate the risks who are most judgemental about it.

Tattiana · 30/12/2025 16:39

I think it’s entirely up to you. It is infuriating that people believe you are public property the moment you become pregnant.

brennanbones · 30/12/2025 16:39

YANBU
my dad had a go at me for riding after spinal surgery

I asked how many injuries I had from riding
“a black toe” he said
and how many from being alive
”you broke your ankle on the stairs and your foot. Oh your other one getting out of bed. And… ok you’re probably safer on a horse”

Jinglejells · 30/12/2025 16:39

well it would be your mistake to make. Not sure why you would even want to take a chance even if the risk was 1%

NuffSaidSam · 30/12/2025 16:39

catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:34

My in laws said that they were safe on motorbikes until somebody else decided to drive into them.

Are you suggesting the OP refrain from driving/being driven throughout her pregnancy?

catpigeon · 30/12/2025 16:40

@NuffSaidSam no, just saying it's not about her skill and a horse or whatever because all sorts of other shit happens

Tattiana · 30/12/2025 16:41

Jinglejells · 30/12/2025 16:39

well it would be your mistake to make. Not sure why you would even want to take a chance even if the risk was 1%

Because it’s about balancing that 1% risk against the implications of not doing the thing eg poor mental health

midsomermurderer · 30/12/2025 16:41

I think the benefits of being physically active and outdoors outweigh the risks. Provided you're sensible and you know the horse, carry a phone and there is someone on the yard with you I'd carry on as long as you are comfortable.

NuffSaidSam · 30/12/2025 16:42

Jinglejells · 30/12/2025 16:39

well it would be your mistake to make. Not sure why you would even want to take a chance even if the risk was 1%

Because if you don't do anything where there is a tiny risk of danger, you'd really struggle to live a full life.

itsthetea · 30/12/2025 16:42

Doctor told me not to take up anything new like rugby or horse riding but to carry on as normal otherwise

if it’s something you already do , you can carry on

I mean it’s no good wrapping women in cotton wool and not letting them leave the living room because of risk - stairs, cars, boiling kettles - risk everywhere

brennanbones · 30/12/2025 16:44

NuffSaidSam · 30/12/2025 16:42

Because if you don't do anything where there is a tiny risk of danger, you'd really struggle to live a full life.

Show quote history

Exactly. The surgeon who operated on my back told me to go away and live (to avoid rollercoasters and high impact jump exercises)
I herniated my disc so badly I got cauda equina from - turning round in the kitchen

Littlebitpsycho · 30/12/2025 16:44

Do what you are comfortable with. I had 2 horses whilst I was pregnant - one highly strung competition horse who I immediately decided not to ride, and one pony who although not the easiest, I'd had him 10 years and we knew each other inside out and back to front.

I rode him until 6 months until one day it was really painful dismounting (even though he'd taught himself to line up with the mounting block, and I'd then swing my leg forwards over his neck and step off) and I then stopped completely.

No regrets, and my daughter was sat on him (well held on obviously) by the time she was a week old! RIP Tang, forever missed 💔

AliceMcK · 30/12/2025 16:45

I’m not a horse rider, but I see this like any other “advice” given in pregnancy, you’ve been given the advice, taken it on board and made your own informed decision. It’s no difference to women who compete sports, they know their bodies, they know the risks some choose to carry on some don’t. There are risks everywhere in life as long as you feel safe do what your happy with.

i agree with whoever said welcome to a lifetime of unsolicited advice about you, your body and your parenting. Just don’t let it get to you.

PogoBob · 30/12/2025 16:47

I rode until 30 weeks in my first pregnancy, stopped at 13 weeks in second pregnancy as I was suffering with occasional lightheadedness so didn't feel as safe.

Life is risky, if you're sensible and take the necessary precautions (which it sounds like you are) then there isn't any reason why you can't continue riding whilst you feel safe.

People do seem to expect pregnant women to stop doing anything that could be perceived in any way risky to the baby - it doesn't stop after birth, then you'll get slated for indulging in a 'risky' sport when you've a baby at home!

RandomUsernameHere · 30/12/2025 16:47

YANBU. I don’t think it’s that risky to ride a calm horse that you know well away from public roads. Not completely risk free, but nothing is. People have been round Badminton and Burghley when pregnant.

Shamesame · 30/12/2025 16:48

I got told off by a family member for running in pregnancy.

YANBU if horse riding brings you joy, and keeps you healthy physically and mentally then carry on.

LookSoPerfect · 30/12/2025 16:49

I think it’s normal to express concern as presumably they love you. They’ve said their opinion now though and they shouldn’t mention it again. If they do, tell them it’s not up for discussion.

I say this as someone who actually did stop doing a sport when I was pregnant, but it was my choice to make, no one else’s. I carried on running and some people commented negatively on that though. 🙄