People who feel completely alien to you…

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

I’ll start - people who can’t wait to take the tree and decorations down on Boxing Day (or any time during the following very few days) and ‘have a really good clean’.

2nd (this’ll be popular on MN!) - people who don’t like dogs. 🐶❤️

People who ban all visitors inc. grandparents for a month after having their first baby.

A very weird recent ‘fashion’!

People who take their own sandwiches and flask everywhere. Those who never, ever stop to have a coffee in a cafe. Instead they would rather sit on a freezing cold bench in the middle of town and sit drinking substandard coffee from a flask.

People who wear the same clothes for every event. I’m not talking about the same dress and coat for every funeral. I mean the same type of clothes without any sense of occasion.
So a first date: jeans, trainers, t-shirt. Going to work ; jeans, trainers, t-shirt. A night out; jeans, trainers, t-shirt. A wedding; jeans, trainers, t-shirt. Christmas Day; jeans, trainers, t-shirt. Etc. extra points if the said person then means about being single and never dates never being successful.

• People who enjoy going on a trip with multiple different phases and lots of travelling about staying in different locations

People who enjoy going to a generic Med resort every year.

And people who refuse to stop on a long car journey, have to do it all in one go.

Yes!!

People who love summer. I can’t stand the brightness and the heat. I love cool rainy or snowy days, no headaches or sweaty bits to deal with

God almighty, I really don't believe you've got the 2 degrees you claim to have, because you are so spectacularly dense.

I have never once claimed in any of my comments that I've never interacted with anyone without a degree, that would be utterly ridiculous. If you think I have claimed that I'd be grateful if you would point out exactly where I said that.

I simply said that in my social circles, by which I meant people in my family and and friendship groups, people whom I see on a regular basis, no one is without a degree.

Of course people have come to my house to do jobs, or I speak to them in day to day life when they provide me with a service. But none of them have ever become my friends and joined my social circles.

I'd never heard of this until recently, but it's awful. My sister's friend recently became a grandmother and her daughter in law is an advocate of this fashion. No one has been allowed to see the new baby at all, all the new grandparents are extremely upset, apparently they will be permitted a short visit after 6 weeks.
It really is extremely peculiar, especially when the new parents are close to their own parents.

I really don’t think there’s any point explaining yourself to this person. You can’t reason someone out of a position they didn’t reason themselves into in the first place.

It’s been a ‘thing’ on MN for quite a while - at least as regards people who follow the ‘fashion’.

I do find it seriously weird, not to mention precious! Your poor sister’s friend! My dd was only too happy for us all to visit just hours after she had all 3 of hers. I was the same - I was only too pleased to show off my new babies!

In fact I’d go so far as to say it’s positively cruel.

I always kind of admire people who have a ‘uniform’ that works for them.

Nothing precious about it. Everyone screaming about it thinks it’s a matter of grandparents dropping by for half an hour. Not everyone has local parents.

All four of our parents lived a shorthaul flight away when DS was born, would have had to be picked up at LHR, escorted to and from a hotel (we had a tiny one-bed in Zone 1), and needed to be looked after, fed and escorted everywhere for their entire visit, as they couldn’t manage public transport. No one wants that in the immediate aftermath of major abdominal surgery, baby or no baby.

I’ve only ever heard of this on MN. It’s awful. Some of our best memories are the days after our babies were born and we had loads of visitors. A very special time for everyone.

Numbers one, two and four I entirely agree with you.

To add:

People who go on holiday to resorts but don't actually see or engage culturally with the country they're in.

People who flex about how little they eat. I love dinner so much 🤣

If everyone is a solicitor, or a doctor, or an
architect, or similar, it’s pretty easy to know re acquaintances.

With actual friends, it just comes up in conversation - I know where my friends grew up, where they went to uni and when they moved to London. Also, uni is multiple years of one’s life, often formative ones, there are generally anecdotes.

Of course such circumstances will make a big difference.

But I’m sure most posters will understand the sort of circs I meant - visitors who are well able to get themselves to and from, don’t expect to be waited on, and may well help while visiting, doing the washing up, bringing a meal that can just be shoved in the oven to heat up, etc.

Religious people

People who buy pointless shite on Shein, Temu etc and don't give a shit

When I had DC, I was mentally and emotionally drained and just had no ‘spoons’. I wanted to be left alone (with DH and DC) for a couple of weeks. I honestly wouldn’t have found any of those things helpful. This wasn’t something I was doing ‘to’ anyone else, but something I did for my own mental health and wellbeing.

This didn’t apply to my/DH’s parents, but we have FANTASTIC parents. Lots of people do not, and I can see how having said parents about would be a drain.

Hopefully that explains where some people are coming from a bit.

People who drive everywhere

If you think men aren't a threat, then you are both extremely fortunate but also ignorant. Look around you and read the news.

Haha, yeah your other two definitely perplex and annoy me too! X

I agree and I am of the age when people are having new babies. I haven’t known anyone do this in real life thankfully.

I think it’s more than to draw boundaries around friends and work colleagues etc. but my mum would be heartbroken if I said she couldn’t meet her grandchild for 6 weeks! What a bizarre way to create an unnecessary distance between you and your family members and create a fraught, hostile environment.

I am not ignorant to know that MEN are not a thread, anymore than "new mums" are potential abusers just because a few have abused and done unspeakable things to their children.

A few individuals do not define the entire group.

It's alien to me to picture people genuinely meeting a man for the first time and think first: he's a thread

It's beyond ridiculous, naive and stupid to speak about MEN as an entire group, the same way discussing WOMEN is stupid - we are people, we are all different, unless you refer to biology, obviously.

You and I might be women (well, you are implying you are a woman, how would I know it's true), but we're not the same on any level.

it's less a fashion than a reaction against pushy and rude visitors, who expected to be hosted with not respect for the new mothers.

It should be widely encouraged, what's wrong with waiting to be INVITED to visit? That's what normal people do.

In a country where women go home generally a short few hours after giving birth, changing things and mentality and make people wait, to again be INVITED, is fantastic, instead of them barging in unwanted because they think they have some weird right to be the first to "cuddle" the baby - baby who doesn't care, a new born just need his parents, and frankly even his mum is enough, sorry dads.

the less pushy visitors are, the quicker they will be welcome anyway

People who think Angela Rayner would make a good PM.