If you were told your life ended tomorrow

[Turkeysahoy]

Would you feel you have lived a fulfilled life?

Inspired by a post I have just read which made me think.

I am 34 and would answer No at this moment in time. As I’ve stayed in a career I dislike for too long and haven’t been as carefree as I would have liked. Things I hope to change of course.

How about you?

I would not cry. I've felt I'm done for a long time now

@LadyMacbethWasFierceI am very sorry. I got a shock when I came to your news. Your shock must be unimaginable.
I’m so sorry.

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I'm so so sorry about your daughter x

I guess so, but it wouldn't matter once I'd kicked the bucket.

Fulfilled? Well, there’s stuff that I would have liked to have done, but haven’t. Happy? I’m very happy and content. I love my life. Would be devastated to leave my husband who is my best friend.

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I’m so sorry for your loss. Incomprehensible and utterly devastating.

Yes, to a large extent. I'm married to a wonderful man who I am deeply, profoundly in love with and we have had such happy years together. I have two children whom I adore more than could ever be expressed, and I have had such joy with them. I enjoy and am good at my job, I've helped others because of it, I have a loving family, I've travelled widely.

But my children are young, one is just a baby. The thought of not being there for their childhoods and them missing out on having their mum around would be devastating. I couldn't bear to leave them at this time.

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I do think when people suffer the kind of shock and grief that you describe, they keep going only for the other people (especially their children, grown-up or not) around them.
💐

LadyMacbethWasFierce I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter.

I'd be very sad to leave, plenty of love in my life. Loved my rewarding job and did it for 34 years. 2 grown kids and my youngest still needs me.

I'm so sorry, @LadyMacbethWasFierce .

I’d eat all the Christmas chocolate I’ve been holding off from !

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I'm sorry to hear about your daughter.

For me, I feel like I am done. I did many things and I'm happy with that, I would only worry about how my young adult DC would cope. Otherwise, I'm fulfilled.

OP, I left a career I was done with at 34 and had a whole other career in the last 12 years. It's not too late.

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I nodded along to the first 2 paragraphs of your post thinking “yep, that’s me, that’s just what I wanted to say”
Then to read your news was devastating. I have two DC, both teenagers, and I live in daily dread of losing one of them. It would change me forever, as no doubt it has changed you.
I am so sorry this has happened to you.

Im not afraid or scared of death.
Bring the next life on.

I am so absolutely devastated for you. Would you like to tell us about her? I'm so very sorry.

Working in the funeral industry it's an insight into how people are viewed by those nearest to them. Sometimes, like today you see a loving family grieving, long term friends saying goodbye and real sense of loss. Often, sadly quite often, there's not a wet eye in the house and there's a sense of well that's,that their gone, let's move on.

Personally I'm only 57, but don't expect to live to a ripe age given my family history. But I started with very little, went to a dreadful school, had a career and walked away on my terms to a self employed job I loved. Now basically retired and I want to travel more.

Two regrets in life one of which I could fix. But as a friend messaged me as he was terminally ill of cancelled at 56. "I've had a crack". And I have. I've married my soul mate, met some great people, had some (a lot) of great nights (and days out), drunk a lot and laughed a lot...yeah I could go tomorrow, I don't want to mind.

I wouldn’t be thinking about if I’ve lived a fulfilled life tbh. It’s been okay - I’ve enjoyed some parts and wouldn’t particularly change anything as those were the choices I made with the knowledge I had at the time. I would be more panicking about leaving my child than reminiscing I think.

Since I hit 50, I feel I've kind of come to peace with the idea of death but, also, I kind of think of it something that will happen (hopefully) way, way, WAY in the future. That said, if I died tomorrow, other than being a bit pissed off I did all this Xmas stuff and ruined the whole thing by dying, I think my life has been pretty great up to now. It definitely improved after I reclaimed myself a little from the years of being a SAHM and started asking myself what I wanted, not what everyone else wanted. And I became a better Mum from that too.

Totally relaxed about it. Sometimes I wonder whether different decisions would have had better outcomes, but they could as likely have had worse. In some ways I wish I had lived more selfishly- I’ve done a lot of ‘social good’, if you like. Maybe I should have tried less hard and just done what was best for me.
I don’t regret anything though and I’m ready. I think DH would struggle though, and be a burden on my DSs. I’d like them to have more fun before they had to worry about their Dad.

God I’m so sorry. Heartbreaking 💔

As for me I’m not ready to go not even remotely I’m only 52. I’d feel relieved and proud I’d raised 2 kids pretty much to adulthood, but they’re still too young to have no mum. Obviously I appreciate there are plenty of kids who are their ages with no mum and it’s something they’d have to live with if it happened

So very sorry to read your post @LadyMacbethWasFierce
I can not begin to imagine what you are going through ❣️

Life can be so damm cruel.

Most people would say no. Don't you think.
Unless they've had an unusual moment of clarity earlier, a near death experience to shake them up and out of their stupor, or are a Buddhist.

100% yes.

To answer the question no I haven't lived a fulfilled life.
I work full time and work an evening job too just to pay the rent.
It's tough as a single income household but I do it for my kids stability.

I don't fear dying but I worry about no one there to look out for my kids.