This horrid little man

[Lovelycupofcoffee]

So almost a year ago I asked a local painter and decorator to come and quote for some work . Ever since then he’s been sending unwanted messages and recently other unwanted images ( you know what I mean 🤣) . I’ve blocked him numerous times but he must have 2 phones as a few weeks later the calls and messages start again . He’s definitely married or has a partner . If he contacts me again would you tell him you will report for stalking ? I’d rather he just sods off but I know he will be back as I think he probably does this quite a lot 😕

Screenshot all messages and images showing timestamps, dates and his numbers. Go down to the police station and say you want to make a formal complaint and him to be charged. He should not get away with this, and it shouldn't be brushed off by the police.

That is not victim blaming.

If I a decorator sent me a photo of his dick after giving me a quote it would be straight to the police unless I found it slightly titivating or funny. Blocking him would happen once and immediately on both phones an that would be an end to it. He'd be very clear that I didn't need to know his Christmas or 2026 plans.

Can you not block both numbers?

it is illegal to send unsolicited nudes in the UK as per the online safety act 2023 (effective as of Jan 2024) and is classed as cyber flashing.

id report the dirty little fucker to the police and hope he gets everything he deserves as like you say you are unfortunately not the first or the last he will do this too.

Technically illegal to post private messages online without permission but am pretty sure in this case no police or courts would take action when the messages are used as proof as harassment and themselves breaking the law.

Certainly when it comes to publishing things similar without permission in the press, being in the public interest negates the law.

But how can he come back if you've blocked his two numbers? Make it make sense OP.

I had this with a decorator once and now intrigued to know where you are from if it’s the same guy. He never got as far as images but was messaging me and it was flirty/inappropriate. Highly annoying as he actually had finished the job and did a good job and I wanted more doing!

obviously never had him back and I just blocked him as it wasn’t anything police worthy but was creepy given he’d finished the work so had no reason to contact me (he didn’t know we wanted more work doing)

I would report to the police now

Post his numbers here and we can all text him on Christmas day asking why he's sending unsolicited dick pictures to strangers.

Op are the police not doing anything about the pictures he’s already sent you? I’m shocked. Why make an act illegal if they won’t deal with it? Surely it’s a gateway to other types of criminal sexual activity and should be investigated?

Is there any way you could let his wife know? I don’t usually think this is the best idea, but she needs to know her husband is a disgusting pig.

Why do men do this??? Why does anyone think sending a strange woman that you’ve only spoken to once or twice a photograph of your penis to be the behaviour of a rational, sane person? How could anyone (a) think is acceptable and (b) elicit the response they are clearly seeking. When has this ever resulted in the recipient thinking “oh how lovely, I was really hoping that plumber would send me a picture of his erect penis, and now he has! I’m absolutely thrilled and will be calling him up to arrange some sex immediately!” I am guessing this has never happened. Not once. What is wrong with men?????

The only way to deal with sick perverts who sexually expose themselves to women is to block immediately, and then report to police.

Don't give these people the chance to send you more than one text.

If you don't like the communication, just block.

You don't have to suffer anyone harassing you ever.

Thanks for reporting him - it will make him stop and think before he does it again at least. It's vile behaviour and it escalates when left unchallenged.

Bloody hell, it's stuff like this that makes me grateful I'm married! (Have been 30-ish years.) Who the fuck do these men think they are?

Last summer, I had an annoying and pushy bloke from our village some 5-6 doors up, pushing himself on me - verbally not physically - complimenting me, and calling me 'pretty,' and he started bringing gifts around to me (I was in the garden, trimming the hedges,) like old books and shit he had obviously got from charity shops or had in his house for years!

After the 5th time (in 2 days) I said 'honestly you need to stop bringing me stuff.' I was polite but not rude as quite honestly I felt a bit sorry for him. I think he was lonely. (It's not the job of a woman to be an emotional support blanket for a man though I know that...) He said 'I don't mind, you're a lovely lady.'

At that point DH came outside, (to pop something in the wheelie bin,) and this man (standing at the bottom of the drive at this point,) went white and looked stunned. He hadn't realised I had a husband. (DH rarely leaves the house only for work,) and he ran off quickly. Even if I hadn't got a husband, what the fuck did this man think he was doing?!

I hadn't told DH by the way, not at that point as it hadn't escalated at that point. He very rarely walks past our home now!

Let us know how it goes with the police @Lovelycupofcoffee Hope you're OK....

I managed to find a woman plumber and she is a diamond, hard working, very competent and a pleasure to have in my home. Trying to find a woman decorator now.

Report to the Police. Don’t communicate with him at all.

I think I'd reply and say your partner has seen his messages and is really angry.. does this creep think you are on your own? Sounds like a little weazel who would be scared of by another male. but I think you should report it as well. he obviously gets off on this sort of thing and won't stop at just you.

Ok I understand now. Between the blocking and then you saying that after a while he messaged again it sounded like you were blocking and unblocking all the time.

I'm glad you've reported him, hopefully they'll do something and he will leave you alone.

It's horrible how common this seems with tradesmen

I've never known anyone get through to 101 (and make and finish a report) within 5 minutes. Must be some kind of record!

This would not be classed as stalking but you could and should contact the police regarding harassment. It definitely falls into this category, and yes, do warn him and adhere to that warning.

In short, he is a sex pest! It isn't even as if you met him on some kind of questionable site. You wanted a tradesman, not a professional pervert. :)