To feel irritated when people with older kids who work part time say they have no time for exercise

LuciaLydia · 21/12/2025 13:53

Totally agree with you OP! See also people who say they’ve got

NO TIME AT ALL

to read a book!

UnimaginableWindBird · 21/12/2025 13:54

People with older children who work part time might also have a lot of extra demands on their time. I had a lot less free time when I had younger teenagers and a part time job than I do now with older teens and a full time job. And now that I can take regular time to exercise, I certainly don't see it as a put down when other people don't feel they have that time - I'm just grateful that I'm no longer in that situation.

Dearg · 21/12/2025 13:56

YABU in thinking that their opinion matters.

They just have different priorities, and that’s fine.

Personally, I think prioritising exercise goes a long way to setting you up for a healthy old age, but then I love the endorphins!

Try to ignore them.

BeforeSigourneyWeaverTheyWoveTheirOwnSigourneys · 21/12/2025 13:57

Maybe, just maybe, they are just saying something about their own lives and haven't considered how you may make it into being about you at all.

SleeplessInWherever · 21/12/2025 13:57

What they mean is either that they don’t want to, or don’t have time that they wouldn’t prefer to do something else with.

I am currently sat on my arse on the sofa, having just finished organising the Christmas presents. I do have time, I have right now, and probably the time I spent putting things in piles. I don’t want to.

Would it feel better if they just said “I don’t want to, or I’d prefer to prioritise something else,” or is the issue really that you think they should do it and aren’t?

TheWonderhorse · 21/12/2025 14:00

Why do other people's time estimates bother you so much? Are you happy with your own life and the choices you've made? If so then great, if not then change them.

Whether someone else feels like they have time to do what you're doing alongside their other commitments is of no consequence to you.

notacooldad · 21/12/2025 14:00

I feel they are implying I have all the spare time in the world and they’re much busier than me
Well if thats your take on it fair enough. I dont see it that way because I dont know people's circumstances, health, attitudes, what they are 'allowed' to do in their relationships etc.

Why make it about you when no one gives a toss about your exercise routine.

Screamingabdabz · 21/12/2025 14:01

Why do you care so much about the excuses people have for why they do or don’t exercise? Jeez what a dull little life if that’s your preoccupation. Are you one of those peevish little fat haters?

Bookaholic73 · 21/12/2025 14:05

I have older children, work full time and still make time to go to the gym.

But I think YABU. Some people have elderly parents to look after, more work to do, a menagerie of pets to look after, etc.

cadburyegg · 21/12/2025 14:05

What do you mean by older children? Mine are 10 and 7 and I feel like I have less time than when they were toddlers. People think that once children start school people have bags more time but that hasn’t been the case for me. I’m a SP though

FOJN · 21/12/2025 14:08

Not everything is about you. You're being a bit paranoid or over sensitive, unless there is a massive drip feed coming.

somanychristmaslights · 21/12/2025 14:08

God, who cares what people think????

TinselTitts · 21/12/2025 14:10

Lol at 'probably' overreacting.

What makes you think they're thinking about you at all when they're talking about themselves?

CuppaTandBicky · 21/12/2025 14:25

Maybe they just can't be arsed.
Maybe theyre burnt out and just need time to sit and do nothing.
Maybe they genuinely don't have time cos they have to drop their kids off at multiple different activities/friends.

Not really anyone's business is it...

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 21/12/2025 14:28

Yes YABU.

I work full time and have 3 teenagers and do make time to exercise. But I also recognise people have all sorts of other stuff going on in their lives, that I may not have time or even just the energy to exercise.

Be kind, you never know what someone might be going through behind closed doors..

User7854653 · 21/12/2025 14:29

Maybe they're just more altruistic than you? Exercise is always inherently selfish because nobody benefits from it aside from yourself. It's repetitive and uncreative. People who are really into sports are usually the most boring and self-absorbed ones you'll ever meet.

Spending time on things aside from exercise means other people usually benefit. If someone prioritises grocery shopping, cooking, errands, chores, tidying, dog walking, school runs, visiting elderly parents etc then they're using their time and action to improve the lives of other people.

It's usually not that they don't have time, it's just if they have one free hour in the day, they'd rather be doing something else.

Elmspringwater · 21/12/2025 14:30

I get irritated with people, that get irritated with other people, that has nothing to do with them.

Enigma54 · 21/12/2025 14:33

Maybe they don’t want to exercise? Maybe they have elderly parents who need some help and support. Perhaps they have time consuming pets or horses? These people could have health conditions which prevent them from regular exercise?

Comedycook · 21/12/2025 14:36

I have older teens...I was a sahm until very recently, now work full time. Didn't exercise as a sahm... don't exercise now... because I hate it. You are really overthinking this.

canklesmctacotits · 21/12/2025 14:37

Go on, admit it - this is about one specific person who’s said this to you, isn’t it? SIL? DS? “Friend”?

Dramatic · 21/12/2025 14:44

I don't know what you mean by "older children" but when I was a single parent with 3 primary school aged children I worked from 9-3, picked the kids up and took them to their various activities, did tea, got them to bed, tidied up etc. By that point I was too shattered to exercise so yes I would say I didn't have time, I suppose I could have done it when they were in bed but I needed to prioritise the housework and resting before doing it all again the following day.

AmyDudley · 21/12/2025 14:45

Well essentially they are saying they use any spare time they have for other things so they don't have time for exercise as well as these other things they prefer to spend their time on.
.So you are making a judgement call that exercise is a more virtuous and valid way to spend spare time. Maybe they find that quite irritating, and rather self absorbed of you.
You might feel more at peace if you got on with your life and let other people get on with theirs.
Also very judgemental and limited in thinking to asume everyone with older children and a part time job is in exacty the same circumstances, they aren't the uniform group of time wasting non exercisers you seem to imply.

Comedycook · 21/12/2025 14:46

Also remember op...when your DC are older, so are you. I'm absolutely shattered most of the time!

OhMaria2 · 21/12/2025 14:46

A new level of nuts on mumsnet

BennyHenny · 21/12/2025 14:48

headphonequeen · 21/12/2025 13:49

I feel they are implying I have all the spare time in the world and they’re much busier than me. Probably overreacting but it feels like a bit of a put down to everyone who does make the time for it.

You’re thinking about this way too deeply and taking it way too personally 😂 I’ve got less time to exercise now my kids are older as they are out and about more in the evenings and all do a wide range of activities. It was easier when they were younger and my partner and I could exercise in the evenings once they were tucked up in bed.