To feel irritated when people with older kids who work part time say they have no time for exercise

[headphonequeen]

I feel they are implying I have all the spare time in the world and they’re much busier than me. Probably overreacting but it feels like a bit of a put down to everyone who does make the time for it.

Honestly I think there are very few people who genuinely don’t have the time, but lots of people who feel like they don’t have the time.

Right now is the first time in my life where genuinely feel I don’t have the time- 20 month old & 6 week old EBF baby. Even then if I wanted to I could probably find the time, but I’d probably have to find a local drug dealer to help me get the energy🤣

Im "Mum-taxi" every day/evening except Mondays... which is always the might fir committee meetings, school stuff etc.

I actually find my girls are more time intensive after school now then when they were in Primary school.

So yeah... I'd say that.

Time is like money: it's not really your business how other people spend theirs, unless they are trying to lay claim to some of yours.

Yabu. I found I had alot more time in the baby and toddler stage to now a pre teenager. My sister has two teenagers and has no time at all. You running around then more. I miss the baby and toddler stage as you get so much more time to yourself

Nah, they're probably fed up with you evangelising about the gym, your zumba class, how amazing it is to go for a run, and saying "i'm too busy" is more polite than "that sounds so incredibly tedious, I'd rather gouge my eyeballs out".

I do have less time to exercise than I would like. But I have a full time job, a toddler and a primary aged child with ADHD. I fit in what I can where I can (aiming for the gym once a week - but there will be weeks where that is not feasible).

What a shame OP all that exercise and tine management and your judgy pants still fit you!

So they are saying they themselves do not have time for exercise and as they were speaking of themselves you have now decided this is about you, if I felt like this I would feel I have to work on my narcissistic trait, why do people have to make things about them?

Why would you see it as a put down? They are just stating their position ... or possibly a perfectly reasonable disinterest in exercise!

Sounds that way!

Who cares anyway? Each to their own, within their capacities. Exercise is to benefit yourself and someone else's exercise, or lack of, doesn't impact your own health directly.

Then there's my friend who was obsessed with fitness and health and made plenty of time for exercise. If anyone was going to have a fit an healthy old age, it was them. That's till they developed the heart rhythm problem in their mid-50s and got told to slow down dramatically.

This...

It is very easy for others to judge..
But people have very little insight into what others lives 'look' like...

I try and attend 40 min exercise classes a few times weekly.. Not always though... If my elderly father has thrown up/smeared poo... If he's asleep /'easy' that day I can dash off..

It's not about being lazy/not committed.... I'm far from lazy and committed to my elderly parents well being.... Caring responsibilities take lots of different formats.

PS... I also don't want to spend 30£ I haven't got for an hours care when he's being difficult so I can escape

This

How are you making someone saying "oh I don't have time for that" a comment about you? You might want to get out of your own arse a bit, some people just use their time different to you, it's not a commentary on you or a put down of you. This may surprise you to learn but you're only the main character in your story.

WLIs have shown that everyone is a fat hater. That’s why 2m people are on them.

I would have to disagree that looking after yourself is inherently selfish. I'm in a situation where my parents, who have never exercised or taken particularly good care of their health are really struggling. A lot of these things are down to previous lifestyle choices.

I made a promise to myself that I would take as good care of myself as I can so at least I know I'd have done everything I can so my children aren't in the situation I'm in.

A lot of my friends do a bunch of interesting sports and there's a great social aspect to it.

Also, not that it really matters, but I always pick up as much litter as I can on my cool down walk after my run so I do take a bit of offense at being called selfish for exercising 😅

How did you manage to make someone not having time to exercise about you ? Or is this a round about way to have a bit of a boast 🙄

Some people feel an inner need to exercise. For other people it’s a chore. Let your SiL be her and you be you.

I work 4 days, DC at primary school

DH works full time long hours

no cleaner, gardener etc

I go to gym 3x per week and walk at least 15,000 steps per day

I don’t spend time watching telly, etc

I work ‘part time’ but it still works out at about 45hrs a week, single parent with three late teens, two can drive, third needs lifts regularly as we’re fairly rural. Thankfully, the older two can help sometimes with driving now.

I have only made time to exercise in the last 6 months or so, but what this means is that my two elderly parents (who live separately and therefore supporting them both is double the visits) see me less 🤷🏻‍♀️. I feel terrible as my frail mum is quite needy and I often feel harassed with frequent calls, but it’s ok as I’m prioritising myself with exercise now. It feels shit all round really. And that’s before I consider my different friendship groups who’d all like to meet up regularly.

I believe anyone who says they don’t have the time to exercise. They’ve made the decision to do other, necessary, things with their time, and that is ok.