Just got shouted at in a coffee shop for coughing in public 🥴

[wildgreyocean]

I know I’m not being unreasonable here but I just need some reassurance! I was in a coffee shop after popping to the shops and got a tickle in my throat. I’ve had a cold all week but nothing too severe. I coughed and next thing I know an old man is shouting at me that I’m being selfish and should be self isolating at home, and “don’t I know the NHS is on its knees?!”

AIBU to think this is a total overreaction to a cough?!

I don’t think the vulnerable should have to stay at home every day of the year so that those who are ill or knowingly carrying bugs can carry on regardless

If you’re ill stay at home
or
Wear a mask, only go out if absolutely necessary and use hand sanitiser

If you’re vulnerable wear a mask and use hand sanitiser

Im not vulnerable but recent Christmas shopping has brought me down with some bug and I’m now on antibiotics. Clearly someone out and about spreading their germs without a care for others.

People should give a thought for others. It won’t kill you but the bug might kill others

of note my comment is generalised
I see OP isn’t contagious

OP it’s not surprising really that someone called you out when you coughed with an awful lot of people happy to carry on regardless when they are ill and contagious

But shouting and spitting all over a woman sitting alone is fine?

How do you know it was the Christmas shopping trip?

Clearly someone out and about spreading their germs without a care for others.

Amazing the way nobody on MN ever gets infected by someone who was asymptomatic.

Why all the narrative around how youve had a cold for the past week and don’t want to stay cooped up inside just because of a cold, if that’s not relevant?

why not write:
”i don’t have a cold but i coughed in a cafe and a man shouted at me. obviously, if i had a cold i wouldn’t have gone into an enclosed space simply for a hot chocolate. aibu?” If this version is correct then i am fully on your side.

Btw “I’ve had a cold for the past week” is present perfect simple tense ie to describe something that started in the past and is ongoing.

‘Braying like an old goat’ ‘spitting’

And ‘lovelier’ not quite matching up there.

I remember getting a bollocking from a gobby woman in front of me at the checkout during COVID who felt empowered as she had her DH with her - I was not coughing but breathing - she had been stuck indoors doing nothing for months and had only just felt able to go out and in her opinion was too close.
I did blow my top - I had been having to go in to work every day and couldn't help but tell her how lucky she was not having to work. Then she saw my NHS lanyard - it was great watching her squirm

How you describe your cough doesn’t sound great. And you know that you cough but won’t carry tissue. That seems selfish to me.
I’m with the man on this.

Fair enough you've pointed out that you dont consider yourself contagious, but coffee guy wasn't to know that & it's likely you sound really ill.
With kindness, in your position, I would have gotten a take out hot chocolate and enjoyed it in the fresh air on my way home without stressing anyone out. Hope your cough is better soon.

Dh and I haven’t been anywhere else and I was told I must have picked it up recently

I wouldn’t have said anything but it is so frustrating how many adults send their kids to school/nursery while clearly sick/who feel it’s okay to be on a busy environments while clearly contagious. It’s not even something urgent, it’s just you prioritising your desire to be out and about over anyone else’s need to be healthy over Xmas /in general. If Covid taught us anything, it was that vast swathes of people care very little for others!

The man shouted at OP, spreading his own germs and spittle. Shouted at a woman sat on her own. And you think he was in the right?

I think it is wrong to go about coughing everywhere so close to Christmas just because poor little you would be bored at home. I suppose it's just another example of the me me me culture

My cold has come to an end, but that annoying tickly cough that can't be stopped once it starts? I have that. My lungs are churning out phlegm which I'm then swallowing. I'm using alcohol gel when out and about and sneeze into a tissue or cover my mouth when I cough.

I haven't been contagious for the last week, but that cough has been lingering. If someone told me that, they'll be ignored. I did get a bit concerned and wondered if I should mask up while out and my DH said: "Nope. If they're not unwell but are immuno-compromised, they should be masked up, not you."

I'm aware people have health anxiety, I do to an extent, but when you start barking at people for coughing, that's just insane.

Other people's stress and health anxiety is not for OP to manage. What about the PP who coughs because she has lung cancer? Should she avoid being around people in case her cough worries them?

Surely if you work for the nhs you would appreciate people keeping their distance and being cautious

I wouldn't have squirmed I’d have been surprised

Some crazies here about a cough/cold! I work with little ones who have them all the time and streaming noses.
People have lost their common sense! These general bugs are what keeps your immune system ticking along nicely.

I think it depends if you coughed a lot more than once.

I would chance going to a coffee shop at the end of a cold, but would feel antisocial if I coughed more than a couple of times, and would then drink up quickly and leave.

I also think it's more important to be thoughtful at Christmas as people have so many gatherings they want to attend.

Also I also know some people get worse symptoms with a cold than I usually do, so they may suffer with it more than me if they got it.

However I believe the man should have kept quiet as you can never know why someone is coughing. As many here have said it's not always to do with a catching illness, and is also too dramatic a response and upsetting.

Yes, odd behaviour from someone apparently so concerned about the NHS. After all, he could be carrying any number of viruses without knowing. I wonder whether he's too ignorant to know that, or if it was another example of him being the sort of person who thinks his selfishness is morally better than other people's.

It was the correct distance the silly cow wanted a 3 mile exclusion zone

Jesus, it’s like 2020 all over again. Some of the posts on here are deranged!

If I get a cold I can cough for months afterwards, I also cough with allergies. I’m not contagious in any way, shape or form so won’t be staying at home or wearing a mask. If people don’t like it, it’s their problem and not mine.

I remember in 2020 being told on here that I should stay at home when I was coughing in case I frightened people. I was also told I was selfish for not wearing a mask at home and that if I loved my DH I would wear one. It seems as though we’re heading that way again 🙄

i don’t know how you cope with that. do you just stop catching them after being exposed to so many?

I knew a couple who would wear masks in the car when it was just them. Not at home though. My mind still boggles.

Hahahah seeing all the little freaks driving round wearing their masks in the car made me laugh.

Just to then park up, go into the same house together and take them off!

Thanks for explaining
I was confused why later posts said OP wasn’t contagious