1 year old exploring front gardens and Xmas decs decd

[FamilyofTrees]

When we've been out walking recently in our fairly small village, my 22 month old has been wandering into front gardens and having a look around. Especially if they have Christmas decorations up, like reindeer or a Santa.

I say to him not to touch and that it's not our stuff, but beyond carrying him away or putting him in his trike (I'm 8 months pregnant so can't carry him if he refuses to walk so we always bring his trike with us, but I give him the option to walk) there's not much I can do to stop him and I'm not particularly inclined to cause a screaming meltdown over a quick little detour that I personally wouldn't be bothered by. He isn't causing any damage.

YABU - You shouldn't let him go into front gardens at all

YANBU - As long as he doesn't break anything or stay too long it's fine

Parents cause themselves (and others) so many issues in the long run by not setting boundaries in order to avoid tantrums when their dc are little.

I used to think of every tantrum as a learning opportunity that would also make life easier for myself when they were older. It gave me patience and kept my sanity. And stopped me from being scared of tantrums and therefore trying to avoid them.

reins and trike!

you never know what hazards/dogs etc are waiting in peoples gardens. I would not be happy with some random toddler wandering into my garden either - mostly if they got hurt

Oh for goodness sake, be a parent and parent him!!

As much as I would think it was cute seeing a toddler in my front garden I'd also be worried about other people's dogs, breakables, other hazards. I also think you'll be making it harder for yourself in the long run but not creating these boundaries now. They're not my favourite thing but I did use reins for a short while when I was working on making sure my eldest wasn't making a break for it when I was heavily pregnant and couldn't make leg it after him - but this really made me focus on ensuring that I could walk with him safely without them.

The toddler wouldn’t. The parents too dim to teach their child about boundaries and respect for other people’s property would.

Wtf 🤣 you can't just say "there's not much i can do about it" I'm not sure I'd be particularly bothered, but some people might be and it's pretty entitled to just allow him because you can't be arsed to deal with a tantrum 🙄

Interpretation of this post = I have absolutely no control over my toddler because I am not prepared to set boundaries and when they are a teenager so what if they break into your car or home. They are only looking. I will be busy and not prepared to cause them to shout over something that I personally wouldn’t be bothered by.

I really hope this is one of those reverse post thingies and the poster is not serious. If you are seriously posting this because it’s true, get a grip of your child’s behaviour now and set boundaries before it becomes an issue.

You are disrespectful. Just because you don’t mind your toddler wandering around YOUR garden doesn’t mean others want your child trespassing on theirs, potentially walking over plants, bulbs, destroying roots. What about when they want to wander into a garden and there’s a loose dog. What if they let the dog free. What if they get hurt or break something. What if they’re still doing this when they’re 20 because you’ve let them think it’s ok? Teach them to have some respect for other people and their belongings and privacy - before it’s too late.

My kids always try and walk in other peoples front gardens and on their walls. They are older than yours so I can tell them off and explain and they arent allowed to do it.
Can you get reigns for him or a double buggy with the cot and pushchair together for him and baby.
Most people wouldnt say anything, even if they are pissed off but it isnt really ok to walk into other peoples gardens and you never know when someone might take extreme offence and start getting angry and aggressive.

Yeah that's the bit that would annoy me

I've chosen one fairly at random to quote, but I want to add that I am not letting him wander away from me or go towards anything dangerous. If a dog attacked him somehow before I picked him up from the maximum 1m he had gotten away from me (because I had let him and was watching closely, you are all correct in saying I would not let him wander into the road) then that dog is point blank dangerous and should not have been loose because we are barely off the pavement. The dog could also easily run into the road. And obviously I am aware of cars moving. The front gardens he has looked around actually didn't even have driveways. They are basically patches of grass just off of the pavement.

Temporary decorations aside, have you considered the plants growing in the garden all year round? Lovely shiny berries can be tempting - and poisonous, (e.g. laurels)
If you let him wander in like this while he's little and cute, when are you planning to set boundaries? Probably a far worse tantrum will ensue when a restriction is imposed, and he can't understand why it's not OK any more.

Yanbu

I’d be happy for him to have a wander in my front garden! But in general it’s not a good idea as he might slip out of sight and get into some sort of trouble.

I wouldn’t let him as it’s a private garden. You don’t know what hazards might be there eg lawn treatment or wire holding decorations in place.
Reins are so useful at this age. He can walk but not stray and not be uncomfortable having to hold arm up.

Parent your child. So what if he has a screaming meltdown? Deal with it. This is permissive, lazy, entitled and obnoxious behaviour on your part

So it’s not just a baby wandering into someone else’s garden it is you as well trailing behind him . YABU

Nothing you can do? Kids need telling right from wrong. You presumably tell them not to walk in the road, take their hand, put them in the pushchair. Its just straightforward bad manners to "explore" someone else's property without being invited.

YABMU. Get some reins on him and control him.

If anyone comes out explain, it's not a hanging offence in a toddler, if he doesn't touch or damaged.

There is a big difference between don't it's dangerous and you shouldn't. You don't want to confuse them.

My 20m old son tries to do this. I think it’s cute but I stop him from doing it because others may not think it’s cute. As others have suggested, reins. We’ve got the Little Life backpack.

I would be furious if I found a random toddler in my garden, even more so if their parent wasn’t actively trying to remove them.

I am also extremely relieved to see that everyone is so vehement about not violating private property, as clearly this should translate into being appalled at taxation, which is just theft and violation of private property by the government. If you cannot see the parallel then I can recommend reading this: https://www.libertarianism.org/columns/is-taxation-theft

Keep your child off other people’s property.
Another entitled parent raising a child who does whatever they want.

Respect for other people's property would be my first concern. Parents need to teach children to function appropriately in the society we live in.

He is one, of course you can control him. If you don't set boundaries now you will in in trouble in a few years when you have a 4 year old and a 2 year old running in opposite directions. 1 year old is the easy part of a toddlers life