to tell this nosey mother to shove off?

[theBOD]

long sorry but need an opinion.
i was meant to be playing football with mates and my lectures finished about an hour early. now seeing as i lived about an hours drive from where we were playing it made no sense for me to go home so i decided i'd just drive to the park where we play and do some work(play solitare) on my laptop for the hour and listen to the radio.
so i parked on the road beside the pitches, which also happens to be opposite a playground. after about half an hour some woman came over to me and knocked on my window asking me "what do you think you're doing" and telling me to move as it was "not right" and i was making the parents "nervous".
apparently i should not be parked and on a laptop near children as a man on his own as this obviously in her mind made me some sort of sex predator.
so i told her that what i was doing was none of her business and told her to get away from my car. she then threatened to call the police (she didn't) and get her husband out (which she did).
anyway was i unreasonable to use some very choice words to her and her husband when they came over to me the second time claiming they didn't want trouble and just thought it was best if i left?

nope fairly normal/ridiculously good looking.

i was the person in a the wholesalers that wannabe mentioned earlier. I reported a man who was clearly using his camera to film or photograph this at a low level - in this case it happened to be directed topwards my children. when he saw me he stopped and put the tiny camera away. it was not paranoia. It was supicious at the least and inappropriate at best. I dont think it is wrong that they asked you what you were doing there - although I would probably have told you that it was unnerving the parents to see someone opposite a playground for such along period of time. Having said you were waiting for the pitches to open I would have left you to it but I would, I ll admit it have been suspicious. We all have different reference points. I have a friend who works for one of the Police who told me that they had an operation a few years ago to crack down on the paedophiles who were hanging around childrens shops - clothes shoes etc just watching filming etc for gratification. Its all part of trying to foster a sense of community, knowing who is in your community being aware of the dangers not just paedos but drug dealers etc and the vulnerable. Yesterday there was a woman opposite the house on one of those walker/seat things. She appeared to be struggling even though she was sat down. I went out and asked her if she was ok and whether I could help. But she said she would be fine and not to worry . five mins later a man walking a dog walks past - he stops to talk to her asking her the samething no doubt but she waves him on as well. When he stopped I did not think he was going to mug her i though he was probably going to ask her if she needed help too. I am not paranoid but sometimes things seem suspicious and people should politely question what they are seeing and act accordingly.

To me, Mojo's opinion just illustrates everything that is sad about today's society.

Men needing to justify themselves for being in the vicinity of children.

Lionheart, that is different you were inside the school playground which is essentially private property and I too would have questioned you if you were at my school and I didn't recognise you (as a member of staff though not a passer by)

Sitting outside a public place is not a crime.

Its all about reference points - nearly being dragged into a car will change your perspective. having another car drive past you 3 times in the space of 5 minutes askign you if you want a lift will do that too.

I'm glad that were observant, that's for sure.
There is, as someone said earlier, a tremendous amount of paranoia around.

DS's granma was asked by a neighbour's child if she could use the toilet (I think she was locked out or waiting for her dad). Granma let her but would not go into her own house while the girl was inside. The paranoia works both ways, I think and that's a shame.

Last year whilst working as a Care assistant i would sometimes have an hour gap for lunch and would try really hard to find places to stop.
In the summer is was just too hot to sit in the car in the sun, so the next best place was in the deserted village GP surgery car park.
On Saturdays it was great as some old guy was always doing the gardening or cutting the grass and he would always have a chat.
The first time he saw me, he did ask what i was doing but i explained that the car park was the only one with overhanging trees that was quite cool.
Depends where you live. I find people in the cities MUCH more uptight about people sitting in cars.

you are right lh there is alot of paranoia on both sides of the argument.

I had a guy who I was letting sleep over on the floor of my room at Uni (yes I know, I was very naive!) try it on with me. I told him not be so stupid. Didn't put me off all men.

Girl at work who escaped the attempted abduction (see earlier post) thinks the current paranoia is stupid. She mentioned it when we were having a disucssion about current fears.

Again at Uni, a couple of friends were "exposed" to, close to our residence.

The doctor at Uni was nicknamed "Fingers his-name" and always wanted the girls to take off thier tops for an examination - I just made sure to register with a "town" doctor

Someone in my close family has been affected by abuse within the family - and the "abuser" no longer allowed access.

I still like and trust men

It is possible still to have a sense of persepctive.

Perspective to me means that sometimes things are innocent and sometimes they are not. I generally dont mind if someone asks me why I am somewhere. I dont have anything to hide. My sense of persepctive has been shaped by events and lead to the sometimes innocent vs sometimes not view.

agree prettybird. It makes me glad I'm not a man.

I suppose the point I was making is that we all have different perspectives. I was saying that I could have had a far more suspicious outlook on life given the various examples I gave (which to me are just examples of life - there is good and bad everywhere - but majority good ). I chose not to. That is my perspective.

A glass half full, not half empty

YANBU. Ring Joe Duffy.

I would have told her to F* off pronto.
Yes we all know there are some down right perverts out there, but I think the people who see Perverts/dirty old men/child beaters round every corner and the real sickos with the dirty minds tbh.

thebod - maybe she fancied you but is crap with chat up lines after all you did say you were 'fairly normal/ridiculously good looking'.May be she brought the husband to the car coz they fancied a 3some but it just went horrilby wrong!!

Actually I think that the woman was very brave. Too many people turn a blind eye and although she may not have handled it as well as she could, I still think she was brave!

FWIW I just asked my DH if he would sit near a childrens park with a laptop and he said "No way. In this day and age you need to be very aware of your surroundings and not allow yourself to be put in situations like these. Accusations can be made and mud sticks".

It may be a sad fact but it is true!

The media tells us that we have a child mollester on every corner no wonder people are frightened.

But, turning a blind eye to a man in his car minding his own business is exactly what she should be doing really.

People who believe everything they read in the media are ignorant fools who are lacking in the brain capacity to make their own judgments.

MrsWeasley - your DH wouldn't sit in a park where there might be children in case someone thought he was up to something? Seriously? WTF?

No he wouldn't, not on his own (ie without kids) He has just said he would move because someone might think he was up to something!

I have been known to feel a bit uneasy about a lone man sitting in the middle of a childs soft play area. Can't imagine I would even notice someone sitting in a car near a playground.

But what has a laptop got to do with the price of fish?! You can't take photos on a laptop. If you were a pervert on the internet you'd hardly be doing it in public, and if you're working on your laptop you're not paying attention to the kids!

If I saw someone in a car on a laptop I'd just presume they were nicking someones WiFi access.

That is a terrible shame.

I find it interesting though, as where I live, for example, whenever the sun is out, there are literally hundreds of men and women, sitting alone, eating lunch or doing some work out in the park. There are also always lots of children.

Would your DH not go outside for lunch in case someone thought he was up to something? I find that very odd. Certainly, not something I have ever heard before.

Very sad

Were you wearing long socks, theBOd?

It is a very sad reflection of society today.