I’m not going to have a present (or at least not a thoughtful one!) am I right to be annoyed?

[Sillyquestion123]

Basically my DH delayed buying my present (although I didn’t think it would sell out) and now there’s nothing else to get me!

I get beauty freebies from work and there’s nothing else I need not want.

so I’m stuck ;(

There’s still loads of time until Christmas. Some people won’t have a present from anyone.

Then why bother with presents in the first place?

You're clearly very fortunate if you can both just buy whatever you want, whenever you want, so it seems a bit daft to get annoyed over a Christmas present that you clearly weren’t that desperate about to begin with.

He’s super weird about that, because he always wants to join (a bit like with the spa) and our 6yo is too young (and too much responsibility for the 18yo) to leave them overnight IMO.

however, if the oldest gets into Manchester we’re going to a gig there in October

This whole thread is just very distasteful given how many people genuinely cannot afford even the basics. I appreciate it isn't a race to the bottom but it's hard to read how privileged you're being. You seem to have missed the entire point of giving gifts to be honest.

OK so say 'This year for my present I'd like a spa trip just for me to relax in peace and quiet'. Or for you and a friend. Make that clear.

In my view, if he asked what you wanted for Christmas, you told him specifically what and he said "fine; I'll get that for you" there's no reason for him to delay - unless perhaps he was too busy to go online and order, or he had to save up the money? OTOH, even you, a big fan who had seen this item and wanted it, didn't realise it would sell out. So I wouldn't be angry at him for not thinking of that. I think it's worth seeing if the item will be restocked, if there's any other way to get it, if it can be bought second-hand (like new) somewhere? But I would leave that research work to your husband, as it's his gift; don't do it yourself.

It’s not your problem to solve, if he knows you at all he’ll find something.

This is a such a good idea.

P.S. What band was your husband in?????

Why don’t you suggest he donates to a children’s charity then? No point buying you something if you have everything you want /need.

I like the idea of the free gig for a teen. Our DD is part of the youth council I’ll ask her if she can help.

i can’t name his band as it would be a giveaway! But they had their own Peel session ;)

Or donate instruments to the nearest primary school. Music lessons have been slashed and millions of kids will never have the chance to find out if they can play something.

This thread is so tone deaf and crass.

What would have been thoughtful about a present you had asked for? He'll have to be thoughtful now though, if you can't give him any ideas. Don't you ever give each other surprises? We don't don't ask each other for specific things (beyond perhaps dropping the odd subtle hint) for Christmas or birthdays. I stopped writing letters to Father Christmas when I was a child.
What's your AIBU?

We used to, but never got it right (I would buy him clothes he hated, and he’d buy me things that were not my style at all, or cheaply made but expensive).

its normally more like a vague ode, but since I didn’t genuinely want anything this year it came down to something more specific.

Blimey, it all sounds like hard work. Have you heard yourself OP?

“Now there’s nothing else to get me”
“So I’m stuck “

Crikey, just let man surprise you ( you may even like the surprise! )

After many years of having to “like” his surprises (and I was also terrible at gifting him) we moved away from it.

t was literally pouring money down the drain as not things (on both sides) went unused.

May I be the first to wish you Merry Christmas OP and may all your gifts be completely what you want them to be. 🙄

OP, people are very different about presents - my family have always been big in presents; DH’s much less so. I have to ask if there’s something I want from my DH, because he has no idea - he once bought me glamorous underwear, which was a lovely thought except that it was about two sizes too small! So now I just send links to things I like, and let him choose something, so there’s the element of surprise, but it will be something I’ll be pleased with.

Fair enough. I don’t know what the answer is then.

I think you're understandably upset about not getting the gift you wanted, but saying that you therefore won't have any gift is cutting off your nose to spite your face.

A thoughtful present is not the one you told him to get. A thoughtful present is one that he has thought about and got for you.

And frankly you sound incredibly spoilt and high maintenance if there is literally nothing else in the world you want or need. Let him surprise you.

OP doesn’t like surprises apparently.

I fail to see that there isn’t anything you would like OP??

like I mentioned, we used to do it that way and after years of thoughtful (but not quite well thought enough) we decided to just stop getting presents blindly. Since then it has been more of a “guidance” but this years there’s really nothing (partially because of my perks at work).

”My diamond shoes are too tight and my wallet’s too small for my fifties”

Jesus, op, just think yourself lucky that you’re clearly so comfortably off that there is literally nothing you want or need. This is so fucking tone deaf…

Clearly you have no right to be annoyed, however. Neither of you expected it to sell out.