Burst my friend's bubble?

[Flyingmonica]

My friend goes on about her son likely being tall - 6 foot 3 based on the UK growth chart. Would I be unreasonable in telling her that because she isn't very tall, this is unlikely to be the case and that the growth chart predictions are rubbish?

She is sold on the idea of her son being tall and her son has come to believe that too but I think that now he is approaching puberty, he may become very disappointed.

Should I just leave it be or should I give her a dose of reality?

I am 5'5" my dd is 5'11", just a bit taller than her dad.
She was off the chart length wise when born, she followed that trajectory.

Why are you obsessed with this boys height, is there some sort of rivalry with your son?
Struggling to see why you would give 2 hoots about a kids height 🤷🏻‍♀️

Is there a particular reason why you want to push the idea that this CHILD is likely to have small man syndrome and fail in life purely on the basis that, in your esteemed opinion, that he's going to be a short arse?

And therefore you have a moral duty to tell him and his mother need to reign in their life expectations now?

Just curious about your logic here given how much weight and emphasis you are putting on his height, rather than anything else he might have going for him.

I’m five feet one inch

DH is five feet eight and a half inches

We gave three six foot DS’s.

I'm 5ft 2, and my husband is 5ft 9. My son is 15 and is just shy off 5ft 11. My Dad's side of the family are tall, even the ladies (I take after my Mum!). Predictions are just that predictions. I wouldn't say a word, you may be right but equally wrong. At the end of the day it makes no difference to you, and your friend and her son will find out either way once he's older.

Being tall is such a strange thing to be proud of.

What's your problem? 🫣

I'm a short arse, my ex husband is tall. My sons are tall. You can't predict it so leave it be.

I’m 5ft 3in and my son is 6ft 3in.
My daughter is 5ft 7in.
Their father is 6ft 1in.

Then there is no issue. If she is not telling him that height = happiness then its really not something that it could be argued requires your intervention.

I can sort of understand where you are coming from OP. My DC were tiny when they were children and didn't grow until very late (well the boys especially). My friend's DC were always "big", predicted to be tall and somehow it was seen as such a thing to celebrate whilst mine were always pitied.
I do take some small satisfaction that my friend's children are now 5ft 8 and 10 despite the red book saying they'd be well over 6ft and my DC is now 6ft 2.

I wouldn't say anything to your friend though.

Unless they are planning their whole life around her son being a potential premier league goal keeper, an Olympic rower or a NBA star then YABU.

Now that I'm thinking about it, in service of warding off potential disappointment, you should probably also mention the odds of him ending up as PM, CEO of JP Morgan, Nobel Peace Prize winner or starting forward for Arsenal based on a statistical height analysis.

I'm 5'3, DH is 6'4.

DS is just over 6ft at 15 years old... With plenty of growing left to do. Genetics are funny things, he could've ended up the same size as my tiny dad - like my nephew has, despite having a tall dad himself.

This is a strange thing to want to 'burst her bubble' about anyway. What difference does it make to you?

I don't know if they still do the red book, but at about 2-3 years old, DS was predicted to be about 6'2", I doubted it as I am 5'4" and DH is 5'8", so that seemed unlikely. He is now 25 and about 6'2".

I don't think he will be a short man in the normal sense of the phrase. He just turned 14 a week ago and is about 5 foot 6 according to what I understand.

I think being a good friend also mean presenting reality.

Why do you care though? Leave this woman and her son alone. This is so weird and nasty. "Burst her bubble" etc. You said shes your friend but you sound like you cant stand her just for saying she thinks her kid will be tall? What on earth is wrong with you?

Yes, it is the red book that she goes by although I think this is based on when he was a kid. I don't know if she still looks at that. We both got rid of our red books some time ago.

Why would you even care about such a petty thing? Bursting her bubble is just mean.

He'll grow as tall as he grows.

Let's be honest.

OP wants to piss on her 'friends' chips and this is really about telling her that her son shouldn't have expectations in life because he's going to be short so needs to lower his life goals and settle for being a toilet cleaner rather than prime minister.

And 'friend' should be grateful to her for bringing such tidings, as it will mean it avoids a lot heartache and disappointment in life.

Basically her 'friend's' son should just give up on life because there's no point in trying as he's going to be short and his height matters to this degree.

And we should all applaud the OP selflessness and grace in making sure that her 'friends' is 'well informed' on the subject because, in the 'scientific' opinion of the OP who thinks these charts are bollocks and knows better than any researcher.

Well-done OP.

Bravo. Tell her immediately. It'll be life-changing.

As in, she might realise you are seriously not any kind of friend and you have no clue about what you are talking about and change her life accordingly to match this revelation.

It's not an exact science. My parents were both quite short for their genders, yet my brother is over 6ft and my sister is 5ft 7. I am just over 5ft.

I don't think you need to say anything at all, what will be will be.

If your friend is short, she is likely to think others of average height are tall. Maybe her son is fairly tall for his age at the moment but may stop growing early and be overtaken by other boys of his age. That was the case with my son who stopped growing upwards by the time he was thirteen. He is a decent height, just a gnats' over 6' but others with whom he was at school and shorter than him, are taller now.

My mother used to go on about me being tall and I was of average height; she was 4'11" !

This is not presenting reality. It's presenting your opinion and calling it a fact, when it is not.

Learn the difference between the two.

You have a lot less ‘science’ behind your theory than she does. Leave her alone!

'We both'... OK so how tall is YOUR son OP? I think we might have got to the bottom of this.

She's your friend. It's up to you