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AIBU?

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Original poster

Burst my friend's bubble?

476 replies

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 13:12

My friend goes on about her son likely being tall - 6 foot 3 based on the UK growth chart. Would I be unreasonable in telling her that because she isn't very tall, this is unlikely to be the case and that the growth chart predictions are rubbish?

She is sold on the idea of her son being tall and her son has come to believe that too but I think that now he is approaching puberty, he may become very disappointed.

Should I just leave it be or should I give her a dose of reality?

OP posts:
KeepAwayFromChildren · 07/12/2025 12:08

I wish this was all I had to concern me.

Theslummymummy · 07/12/2025 12:13

I once had a bf who was 5'3 and he had a son, who was on the shorter side but he insisted he was tall for his age and was going to be v v tall when he grew up. I know it can happen, but I don't know why ye was so convinced when both he and the mum were tiny. Never said anything, my face might have though.

MyCatsAreFuckwitts · 07/12/2025 12:14

You have an unhealthy interest in your "friends" son.
LET THAT SINK IN

Mind your own feckin business.

Most folk this time of year are run ragged with work, kids, family, activities, Christmas.

This is the most unhinged OP that I have read in a while.
Maybe it should be entered for the most batty poster of 25!

Scottishskifun · 07/12/2025 12:14

I think it's impossible to tell unless your running a full genome sequence!

DS1 following the chart is likely to be tall DH isn't he's 5.11 I'm 5.5 but my nephew is 6.4 (my brother is 5.11) so there is tall genes somewhere! He's 6 at the moment and is 130cm and in 8-9 year old clothes and has remained at the 96th percentile for height since a baby.

MrsSlocombesCat · 07/12/2025 12:14

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 13:17

His dad is about 5 foot 10.

Telling her would save her and her son from disappointment by helping them to temper their expectations.

I was 5'5" and my son's dad was 5'11" my own parents were smaller than average but my uncles on my dad's side were tall, at least 6ft. Two of my sons are over 6ft and three are around 5ft 10"

Tiredofwhataboutery · 07/12/2025 12:15

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 15:18

I don't think he will be a short man in the normal sense of the phrase. He just turned 14 a week ago and is about 5 foot 6 according to what I understand.

I think being a good friend also mean presenting reality.

I think my DS was sbout 5 6/ 7 at 14 now 15 he’s about six foot with a bit more growing to do. I think boys often shoot up in bursts at that age.

MrsSlocombesCat · 07/12/2025 12:16

Scottishskifun · 07/12/2025 12:14

I think it's impossible to tell unless your running a full genome sequence!

DS1 following the chart is likely to be tall DH isn't he's 5.11 I'm 5.5 but my nephew is 6.4 (my brother is 5.11) so there is tall genes somewhere! He's 6 at the moment and is 130cm and in 8-9 year old clothes and has remained at the 96th percentile for height since a baby.

With my five son's height at this age was no indication of height as an adult. The shortest one turned out to be the tallest one. You just cannot tell until they are fully grown.

Theslummymummy · 07/12/2025 12:16

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 19:36

What? What do you mean by this? Burst my bubble how?

Show quote history

I think she means, your thought process of how his parents aren't tall so he isn't going to be tall, and has given a. Example of how you could be wrong.

Theslummymummy · 07/12/2025 12:18

Scottishskifun · 07/12/2025 12:14

I think it's impossible to tell unless your running a full genome sequence!

DS1 following the chart is likely to be tall DH isn't he's 5.11 I'm 5.5 but my nephew is 6.4 (my brother is 5.11) so there is tall genes somewhere! He's 6 at the moment and is 130cm and in 8-9 year old clothes and has remained at the 96th percentile for height since a baby.

5'11 is tall though? Average height of men in the uk (apologies if you aren't in the uk) is 5'9.5

MrsSlocombesCat · 07/12/2025 12:19

CloverPyramid · 07/12/2025 09:05

The height they were when they are 2 is considered a good predictor for adult height. A better one than the height of the parents. If that’s the measure she’s using, you wouldn’t even be “giving her a dose of reality”.

My husband is one of six. Same parents and their dad was never particularly tall, but their adult heights range from about 5ft8 to 6ft3.

Edited

That didn't apply to my five son's. The smallest one when they were little turned out to be the tallest. He's over 6ft.

Mooselooseinmyhoose · 07/12/2025 12:20

I agree the charts aren't reliable but my dad is 6ft 4 and my mum is 4ft 11. My brother is 6ft 5 and im 5ft 8 so there really is no way to tell until they grow or dont.

Leave them to it. It doesnt make a difference to you.

ClearFruit · 07/12/2025 12:21

This reply has been deleted

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Thissideof40 · 07/12/2025 12:22

I’m only 5’2 but my partner is 6’2. My son has always been short and all through secondary school was one of the shortest in his year. We bumped into one of his friends in a supermarket one day and he said hi shorty I see where you get it from. He’s 17 now, had a massive growth spurt and is 6’0.
You have no idea how tall her son will be and however tall he gets then it is what it is.

Theslummymummy · 07/12/2025 12:22

This reply has been deleted

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🤣🤣🤣

Queenofthestonage · 07/12/2025 12:22

Chances are he will at least be taller than his dad, all 3 of my sons are. If the parents have taller siblings he could easily be over 6ft.
He doesn’t need to have his expectations managed! He will know from looking around at his peers and their families that it’s a bit of a lottery!

Tiedyeegg · 07/12/2025 12:23

Parental height is any more accurate of a predictor than growth charts, you're both making guesses

It’s really strange this has occupied so much of your attention. Most folk would think ‘aye alright, Kathy’ when she brought it up and forget about it.

typicaltuesdaynight · 07/12/2025 12:24

I’m 5’2 my dh is 5’8 ds is 6’2 so yes he could be tall ds was a tiny baby he started growing really tall at 12

Wiltedgeranium · 07/12/2025 12:27

Dh and I are both tallish. 5'11 and 5'9. Ds is about 5'10 at 16. His friends, with shorter parents, are all taller than him. My other dc is much shorter than I was at their age. I really don't think you can tell.

CautiousLurker2 · 07/12/2025 12:37

Not sure why you feel the need to burst friend’s bubble. If her DS grows, he grows. If he doesn’t, he doesn’t. If she’s obsessed and silly about it, leave her to it. Though from experience I know that having a child that is on the tall end makes shopping for clothing a bit of a mare, so can make you seem overly preoccupied with their proportions.

I’m just 5ft5, husband not quite 5ft 10. My DS was above 99th percentile in the red book - a fact that so distressed the HV we spent years back and forth to growth clinics and having blood tests. He’s now just under 6ft 4 at 17. Most of his friends/peers are 6ft-6ft6, most of their parents are also average heights.

Changes in diet (more protein specifically), healthier/supported pregnancies, better maternal nutrition leading to higher quality breast milk and similar advances in formula milks, all mean many children are taller.

Just change the subject when it crops up if it irritates you.

usedtobeaylis · 07/12/2025 12:44

Just leave them alone.

Pherian · 07/12/2025 12:44

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 13:12

My friend goes on about her son likely being tall - 6 foot 3 based on the UK growth chart. Would I be unreasonable in telling her that because she isn't very tall, this is unlikely to be the case and that the growth chart predictions are rubbish?

She is sold on the idea of her son being tall and her son has come to believe that too but I think that now he is approaching puberty, he may become very disappointed.

Should I just leave it be or should I give her a dose of reality?

A hobby would do you both good. Then you would have interesting things to discuss that you share mutually.

DelphiniumBlue · 07/12/2025 12:48

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 06/12/2025 13:15

I’m 5’3” and DS is 6’4”.

It does happen.

Same. All my 3 sons are over 6 foot, and I'm 5'3. Why do you think the growth charts are wrong? I think they give a pretty good indication, though of course not infallible in every case.

Picklelily99 · 07/12/2025 12:52

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 13:12

My friend goes on about her son likely being tall - 6 foot 3 based on the UK growth chart. Would I be unreasonable in telling her that because she isn't very tall, this is unlikely to be the case and that the growth chart predictions are rubbish?

She is sold on the idea of her son being tall and her son has come to believe that too but I think that now he is approaching puberty, he may become very disappointed.

Should I just leave it be or should I give her a dose of reality?

Is your friend trying to TALK her son into being tall? It sounds like she's actually quite concerned about his height and is trying to reassure herself more than anything. *although I'd be worried she is making her son overly aware of his height!

Lucia573 · 07/12/2025 12:52

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 14:25

Boys care how tall they are or are going to be. So it matters. The UK growth charts are not good predictors, I don't think. How many of your kids ended up in the range the UK growth chart said when they were kids?

My friend's son is early puberty and I just don't see how he is going to grow to that height. He probably expects to be over 6 foot.

My 3 young adult kids are exactly the height predicted by their charts. DD taller than me; DS both taller than my husband.

LemonDrizzleKay · 07/12/2025 12:56

Flyingmonica · 06/12/2025 13:17

His dad is about 5 foot 10.

Telling her would save her and her son from disappointment by helping them to temper their expectations.

No, it wouldn't help them at all. Leave them be.