over a bloody booster seat 🥵

[StarDolphins]

My 9 year old is being taken to a party in Manchester (1 hour journey) today by the birthday girls parents. She is 134cm (she’s a bit less actually but because her Dad told her she’s that, she’s sticking to it)

Sges currently sobbing and shouting (since 7am off & on) because I’m insisting she has her booster seat when all the other 7 kids won’t have one. She said she’s going to get laughed at and she just wants to fit in & be the same. I’ve tried to be understanding, I’ve said blame it on me, I’ve said they’re not good friends etc.

AIBU to stick to my rule? She’s nearly there but technically still needs a booster until 135cm. I’m just worn down as she’s been crying over this ALL morning🙄

You are being ridiculous. I don’t know any 9 year olds in boosters.

It will be the driver who is in trouble if there's an incident and she should have been sitting on a booster.

I think you are being a bit precious too. Your poor daughter.

Eight children in two cars sounds like a lot anyway. Why don't you just drive her there yourself and do some shopping in Manchester?

That would make her feel really included wouldn’t it😉

My 9.5 year old son still uses a booster, you get habituated into it don't you - I'd probably be the same as you initially, as in thinking no way are you getting in a car without one! But the reality is for 1cm, and this much angst, it's not worth it.

I offered this but she wants to be with her friends

If it helps, if they’re heading to Manchester they’ll be in a long very slow traffic jam….

Do the 5 point seat belt test. At 9 shes old enough to understand that that its about safety not being "cool".

Driver won’t enforce it, no chance! One of the kids is same size as mine and the rest are taller.

How she's speaking to you?

She's being honest with you and expecting her mum to understand her.

Op this is a hill I'd die on. 135cm is the legal minimum and is not necessarily when a seatbelt will fit safely. My 9yo is taller than that, but a seatbelt will still go across his neck and tummy - in the event of a crash he'd be seriously hurt. More like 150cm is when seatbelts start to fit properly.

I don't think you're being ridiculous at all! An hours drive is not a short local trip. If the driver is having to put up with a load of excitable 9 yos they could easily be distracted.
The law is there for a reason. My DD didn't reach 135cm until the end of the summer before starting secondary (small, summer born), and used her booster until then.

Thank you, I did think that😆 we live in the Peak District so they can go fast for a bit first though! But I get what everyone is saying and I won’t make her take it.

My closest friend growing up and my parents god son was killed in a car accident. A parent from our class was driving them to another child's birthday party. Her and her child survived. The mum it turned out had had one glass of wine so under the limit but had slower reactions to the collision
Anyway that was a 9th birthday party and the two that died were 8. Maybe they'd be alive if they'd had a booster although this was 29 years ago.
But anyway that's why car safety is always a non negotiable. Even when we take other kids I request their parents seat or put them on our spare booster. They're either the right height/ weight or they're on a seat. I wouldn't let them go in someone else's car without that too. I remember the mum of my parents god son packing up his room and offering us his toys, his sister becoming an only child. Not a trauma I want repeated.

Obviously it’s up to you whether you let it go for 1cm (since you’ve said the driver won’t mind), but I certainly wouldn’t be letting a 9yr old have a tantrum and try to dictate a safety issue. Embarrassment doesn’t trump safety.

Goodness me this is such nanny state bs. Don't bother with the booster seat. Even if the police do spot something off, they can't measure your kid, can they? All the trouble they'd get into.....

My daughter is tall and some of her friends will need a booster for years after she doesn’t. I’d think I’d done something very wrong of she teased her friends about it especially in front of an adult! I don’t think she’d dream of it and I can’t imagine her friends would either. Suprised that so many people think this is normal.

The UK isn’t particularly nanny state over car seats really. A lot of countries have higher height limits - 150cm isn’t uncommon.

It’s not about being a baby. It’s about being safe. Europe has car seats until 150cm for good reason.

This is a hill I’d die on - seat belts don’t fit well until about 150cm. If it was a local trip then perhaps. But not distance.

150cm is 4'11". There are fully grown adults that height, do they need a booster seat, too? My mind is racing right now.

134cm is not some magic number: above safe, below unsafe. Just use your common sense.

I was just making the point that this isn’t an area where the UK goes particularly strict.

I wouldn't let ger go at all because it sounds like an accident waiting to happen, regardless of the booster seat.
Honestly OP get a grip, she'll be fine.

They'd be safer in a booster. It's about where the seatbelt hits. They weren't designed for women and children.