Can't afford Dd's very expensive school trip

[Wario54]

My DD is 15 and in year 10 at the moment. We live a deprived part of the North of England. She goes to a local, state comprehensive

My DH has had his hours reduced at work in recent months. I work part time in retail (can't get anymore hours unfortunately - I have asked). Like a lot of families, we're financially struggling to keep our heads above water. But we get by (somehow) and I never take the little things for granted (that we have each other, food on the table and a roof over our heads). We've not told our kids about our financial worries - they know there isn't much spare money but not about the extent of our problems.

Dd has come home tonight with a letter and great excitement about another school trip. They had a guest speaker today (external travel company) in assembly today enthusing them about a trip to Borneo of all places. It's 4 weeks long and the cost is £6,500. Currently planned for June/July 2027 (just after her GCSE'S). They are expected to fundraise some of the cost themselves (bake sales, sponsored walks etc) but we will have to pay the majority if she's to go.

She said today that she'll get a Saturday job to cover some of the cost herself. But even with that, taken into account we just can't afford it. It breaks my heart, because I'd love to give her that opportunity but I know we simply can't.

She's full of excitement about trekking through the jungle and cuddling Orangutans. But how do I tell her when she's already set her heart on it? 😢

I just think the school are being completely ridiculous by offering such an expensive trip in a cost of living crisis.

But raise the money for what? For a teenager to have a wonderful holiday? That is what it is, really - the volunteering element of these trips has very little, if any, positive impact on the communities they purport to help, and the children spend most of their time having 'experiences' rather than volunteering, when you look at the hours allocated across the entirety of their trip.

I think it's absolutely unethical for schools (and I am a teacher!) to encourage young people to fundraise so they can have a nice trip abroad, couching it as a charitable activity, when it really isn't anything of the sort.

If the money went directly to the people the children's 'volunteering' supposedly helped, it would make a genuine difference. Being filtered through a company sending unqualified and inexperienced children to build toilets or 'teach' poor children English or whatever - means the money is worth diddly squat to the people who really need the help.

I actually think fundraising for these trips is a form of fraud. They don't help anyone but the child raising the money.

This kind of trip was offered to both my children, I said no but I know parents who are sending their kids on it, the payment for it is £300 a month starting just before Christmas every month for two years.
Some of these people bang on about university being expensive whilst agreeing to pay what would be over half a years worth of university fees for a 4wk trip.
I would so much rather help my kids with things like driving lessons and uni, even a gap year travelling for an extended period of time would be better that chucking money at this.

15 years ago I worked in a remote 3rd world country for an organisation who ran these sorts of trips (albeit longer minimum times for volunteers and collecting actual scientific data, very heavily supervised by us the proper staff obviously). We used to say then it was “putting the con in conservation”! The amounts they charge the volunteers nowhere near correspond with the amount of money it costs for their travel, food, board, activities and learning. It is just a huge money-making scam. These short term ones often have dodgy ethics around animals and people welfare too, and don’t do anything of any value for the countries they are in.

perhaps look at other options with your daughter for a gap year at 18 or 21, when she will have had time to save up enough and research a company with good ethics and lower costs.

This is a big part of the immorality of these trips. People think that they are giving money to the cause rather than the child. It gives the impression that if the child raises enough money they "win" a free holiday to these places.

"Oh X is raising money, she is going to Africa to partonise poor people!" which whilst techinally true, isnt at all honest. In fact it should be "Please give us £100 to help pay for X to go on a month long holiday!"

I do wonder if these trips will decrease in popularity now personal statements are not included on Uni applications. Cynical, moi?

See, you have completely miss understood how it works. It isn't put down a deposit and pay at a later date. Camp International expect parents to sign a contract and agree to pay £300 a month, defaulting on a month can lose your place.
As for donating or sponsoring, not a chance! As I have said to my friends with kids going on this kind of trip, no I'm donating money for your kid to go on an expensive holiday when I have just spent a fortune on my oldest helping her learn to drive - don't remember anyone offering money for those.

We had the exact same trip dangled in front of us when I was 15, 16 years ago. It was ridiculously expensive and guess what, those that did go ended up horrendously ill with D&V in the middle of the jungle for most of the trip. Certainly wasn’t worth the £5k they had paid to go!
I decided to go on the much cheaper £600 ski trip instead and that was great.

That’s just a no!
and just don’t worry about it. There will be a very small minority who will be going. Kids in year 10 are pragmatic though. Your daughter can crowd fund it herself if she is determined; do sponsored fundraising and all sorts but she needs to make it happen if she wants to go. I doubt it will come to that.

Dear OP, I have a child in private, have a fairly good income and there's absolutely no way I would pay that for a school trip. I would actually complain to school about this, it's cruel to dangle this in front of them. For the record none of my kids went on ski trips either. They 1 trip to Spain which was fantastic and around £900. They say they will do fundraising but that's still all the parents making cakes, buying cakes, paying for car washing etc.
Honestly have an honest chat and say you can't afford it.

My thoughts exactly. This is immoral & I would be screaming from the rooftops. The head, the governors & my MP (because this won't be the only school where this has happened & it ought to be banned). School should either be functional ie relevent to their course or an opportunity ie when my daughter was in year 6, they went to London, saw the sites & went to two shows & it cost me forty quid (1986 ish). She remembers every minute, even now. But £6500? Fuck off, that just grasping.

If a child lives in a deprived area and family then there is far less chance of them being able to make any decent amount of money fundraising as everyone around them isn't well off enough to donate loads

Its not a school trip. Its one of those god awful go and help the poor people things. Put the leaflet in the bin and get on with your life. Honestly, these Borneo/Tanzania/god knows where first world middle class spoilt kids helping build a bloody mud hut make me want to vomit. Don't give it a second thought. They should be banned imo.

I don't see what's wrong with a simple " No we, can't afford it and I don't think your Saturday job will pay"

Really interesting to hear that perspective. My son missed out on one of these ‘types’ of trips as it was Covid but the cost was nowhere near that amount. We are in top 5% of income bracket and I certainly wouldn’t be paying for a 15 year old to go on a £6500 holiday even if it was supposed to be dressed up as volunteering and character building. I’d rather go to that place as a family and they can save up and go travelling like I did when I was 18/19. There are lots of cheaper options online for volunteering abroad and camp America etc when they get older. I think when families are limited on income it’s a better learning experience that charity begins at home. That perhaps the poor parents who are doing their damndest to make ends meet perhaps sit down and start to explain how finances work - budgets, actuals, savings, investments. Get her instead to open a 212 Trading account with a junior ISA or use the child trust fund vehical to drip feed in £25 /£50 a month and then you will see what a huge amount you will have a 21 that will be much needed in the years to come. Instead of shelling out for all these expensive trips and presents and handing down the entitlement - teach them financial independence and the value of it. No one else will. As that is how the poor grow poorer because they don’t know about investing. People are too terrified of it. Good education and investing in global equity index fund and doing a basic beginners course on investing versus a 6.5 k trip to cuddle an orangutan. I know what I’ll be doing !!

She's not going. We talked about it this evening and I think the novelty (including the effort of fundraising and the fact all her friends parents had said no) had already started to wear off by then.

Unsurprisingly - we aren't the only parents that have complained to the school about the cost and way it was handled/presented to the kids. An email has gone out tonight saying that they will be investigating and coming back with a response at some point next week... I'll update this thread if I remember

I find it odd that school let these for profit businesses (and highly profitable - one of the directors of camps international earns nearly £400k a year) come in to pitch, in the way they probably wouldn't let Kuoni come and pitch a ski trip. It is the fake "charity" element of this that seems misleading to me.

You just tell her no. I think this type of trip they are meant to fundraise though. She won’t get a Saturday job, days of teens being able to get Saturday jobs are few and far.,

My son is going on one of those outsourced company school trips - supposedly educational and gets them college credits and counts towards Duke of edinborough (which is completely different over here in the states). He’s doing Greece for 10 days and it cost double what our honeymoon to Greece for two weeks cost! It’s crippling us making the payments as we only got a year to pay it off.

id tell your daughter that it is not a safe location at the moment and that if she wants a month long trip like that she needs to take a gap year. That kind of trip is better suited to gap years anyhow and she can work 9 months then travel for three…

They didn't get it off family and friends, for the most part. They'd go bag packing in supermarkets, bake cakes, wash cars, things like that. One of the girls was an art student and had a skill for caricatures, so did them for people and sold them. It got them involved in the local community.

Work out your affordability over 3yr, til she 18. Say 2k? Then offer her that amount to go round Europe by interail. Put the money aside each month and give it to her at the end of a levels. Use a monzo acc/isa and it will add the interest nicely too.
You can explain how beyond your means 6.5k is. She won't understand but she will forever appreciate your counter offer! Then she can get a Group of people she trusts and go together rather than potentially on her own with people from other schools. My dd went to an affluent school. Some went on these trips but tbh, I got pig sick of stumping up money for them to go on a trip recoiling afford to fund out own dd to go on! These were 3.5k and the fundraising was so full on. And they never got enough.

Just to say, you are so not being unreasonable with this. £6.5k is ridiculous!!!

I'm surprised in this day and age she could sell cakes without a hygiene certificate. And the only bag packers I've seen at supermarket are organised by groups like air cadets and scouts and raise money for charity

id tell your daughter that it is not a safe location at the moment

The OPs daughter has already accepted she's not going- but why would you say Borneo isn't safe at the moment? It's no more or less safe than many other locations, and there isn't anything going on to make it particularly risky now?

I find it rather surprising that a 15yo thought you'd spend £6.5k on a trip for her when you're struggling a bit Has she no concept of money or household budgeting at all? I'd have a 15yo helping plan family holidays, aware of prices and budgets. She must have some idea of what you'd be able to afford.

If it’s world challenge they’re meant to fundraise it all themselves. My sister went on one about 18 years ago and it was £4k back then! She raised it all through bag packing, bake sales, charity car washes, and local businesses who sponsored her.

Iagree