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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to find it utterly vile when people boast about how much money they have?

140 replies

FreddysTeddy · 09/06/2008 16:53

I just find it so crass when people insist on dropping their salary (or worse, their husband's salary) into conversation/onto threads.

AIBU to find it a bit vulgar? Is it some kind of old-school British thinking that makes me feel like this?

Plus, people who are happy and confident don't tend to need to boast about things so I always have a tendency to think that the boaster is telling porkies anyway.

OP posts:
ScottishMummy · 10/06/2008 08:47

LOL now thta is shrewd financial accumen
PS was ScottishMoney a pun

belgo · 10/06/2008 08:48

that was a genuine type

belgo · 10/06/2008 08:48

I mean typo.

ScottishMummy · 10/06/2008 08:48

VVFunny!

ScottishMummy · 10/06/2008 08:53

LOL when granny comes doon the road to visit us she brings scottish money (notes) and Clydesdale bank at that.

Ach she disnae want any o thon English money

think i am tight!NON she has a vice like grip on her caley bash

littlelapin · 10/06/2008 08:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Botbot · 10/06/2008 09:05

I know someone who when you see her (rarely, these days) says 'yes, I'm fine. I recently had a pay rise and I am now earning £XX'. It grates. Especially since she is perfectly aware that it is much more than what I earn.

Chequers · 10/06/2008 09:10

Message withdrawn

ScottishMummy · 10/06/2008 09:17

does not matter to me. i would not chose a friend on basis of earnings. it is competitive and bitty icky to bang on about monsy

PembsLass · 10/06/2008 09:18

I spend my time boasting about how much I have got for the baby on the cheap or second hand. Perhaps this makes me equally pretentious?

hf128219 · 10/06/2008 09:21

Who gives a toss? There are far more important things in life - like health and happiness.

QuintessentialShadows · 10/06/2008 09:23

But it is actually quite tricky. Many years ago I had a very good job, earning 10fold what my contemporaries did. Considering I was just a year or two out of Uni, and we were just in our midtwenties, it posed me some difficulties with friends. Only my best friend knew my salary situation. I honestly did not know what to do if we went out for lunch, should I insist it was on me? Would I look greedy if I didnt? My friend was most comfortable with us taking turns, she did not want her lunch paid just because I earned so much more than her. That would be rubbing her nose in it. But we DID go on fab holidays, and we DID buy our house pretty much mortgage free. Then I left to start a company with my dh, and we have been struggling slightly since....

But, I have tried both shoes, so to speak. I know what it is like to have untold riches, to book spur of the moment luxury holidays to the Indian Ocean, go to the best restaurants. But equally, I know what it is like to have so little money that you live on credit cards and fret over the fact you are paying interest on the food you eat, and the utility bills.

The point I am trying (and failing somewhat) to make is that if you try to treat all your friends and aquaintances the same without having their financial situation in mind, you may end up appearing to be a tactless twat.

Equally, if you DO try to keep their circumstances, you may also end up appearing like a twat.

However, I do agree that people deliberately flaunt the actual amounts and keep referring to what things cost, or how cheap (err not) things are, are indeed very silly and tactless.

Gosh, I am not a master of brevity.

ScottishMummy · 10/06/2008 09:42

after uni my flatmate immediately got a good job and rest of us had junior dogsbodyposts.flatmate earned considerably more than us

but basically she accomodated our needs and we all went out pubs/meals/places we could all afford and split bill equitably

obviiusly despite fact she could afford much more, she was one of the girls and we all continue to be mates.

wage/financial disparity need not impede friendships.itonly does if someone makes money an issue to differnetiate or show off

lets face it noone really likes flash

poorbuthappy · 10/06/2008 09:48

All I know is that regardless of how much money I earn, I never have any!
This is trend which started in my very first full time job after college and will continue until my dying day...once you accept it, its not that bad really!

alittleone2 · 10/06/2008 13:01

Message withdrawn

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