To think it's ok to leave the door open for 15 minutes each weekday?

[ILoveMyGonk]

DS started secondary school this year and comes home himself on the bus. I'm at home working at my computer. Generally, when he gets home, he rings the doorbell and I go open the door for him. However, I now have a 15 minute on-camera meeting that exactly coincides with when he gets home, and obviously it gives a terrible impression if I need to leave during the meeting, even though it's only for a minute.

I want to leave the door unlocked, so he can just come in. (It also would need to be open just slightly, the way the lock works.)

DS and DH both think this is way too unsafe and refuse. DS is also refusing to carry a key, as he is afraid of losing it.

AIBU to think it's okay to leave the door open? It's broad daylight, not a terribly crime-ridden area, and only 15 minutes. We even live opposite a primary school, and it's very busy that time of day. I can even see the path leading up to the door from where I'm working, though I'm not sure I could actually get to the door in time to close it if I saw someone concerning approaching.

I wouldn’t even think twice about it if you’re in the house. My front door is only locked overnight when we’re in. It’s never crossed my mind to lock it during the day

Our back door is open most of the day to let the dog in and out, we only lock it at night. Front door is always "locked" from the outside with a Yale.

It depends if you need to leave the door ajar or whether its the type that can be closed but unlocked. I think if its the latter its fine, its only 15 minutes and you are at home. People think nothing of leaving patio doors open in summer for far longer than that.

It’s fine!

Get one of those stretchy key chains and attach the key to his bag. At 11/12 he needs to learn to be responsible for a key. But it will depend what area you’re in - we never lock the door whilst we’re in and awake..will whizz the dog round the block and not lock the door

I'm baffled that people lock the doors whilst they're in. I've never done this.

We don’t either here. When I lived in Birmingham it was, absolutely

I think he needs to learn to carry a key, but if you can see the path from your window, you could chuck (or lower) one down out the widow when he approaches.

You could do that thing they used to do on byker grove. They had it on a string inside so they pulled it through the letter box to unlock the door. Do a practice run with him.

This is so naive. Thieves are in and out very quickly. They look for the opportunity. You may be lucky or not. I left my car unlocked by mistake twice. Once I was lucky nothing happened. The second time not so lucky. I had stuff to take to recycling in the boot and they just slung it all over my car. A real mess and somehow very upsetting to know someone was in my car. My car was in plain sight of several other homes. From that point I realised there are indeed people who go about trying doors, looking for open windows etc. Op is planning to leave door slightly open. We all think we are being clever but thieves know all the tricks and are one step ahead.

I also once went away for a week and came home to discover that in my rush to leave I had mistakenly left a window wide open. Nothing happened but doesn’t mean I should keep doing it. Not to mention that the cats round here seem hellbent on getting into my house.

Apparently the highest number of burglaries carried out by opportune burglars happen at this time of day.

Do people lock the door when they are in their own house? Really?!? This amazes me! Mine is always unlocked.

This again
Yes, people really do lock the door when they are in the house because we don't all live in some fantasy land where crime never, ever happens. It amazes me at how people like you are so naive @Polyestered

I live in a low crime rate area, not a zero crime rate area. Leaving doors unlocked would affect any insurance payouts as it would invalidate the terms of the policy.

Why do women do this. Try to.solve everyone else's problems.

Tell your ds and dh at what time you cannot answer the door. Tell them you have suggested a couple of things neither of them are happy with ( leaving door open for 15 mins or giving your son a key) so the problem.is now theirs to solve. Tell them the only thing that cannot happen is you opening the door in the time you have your meeting. Tell them you are fine with anything else they come up with to solve the problem of how you son gets in the door after school

Reiterate to your son when he leaves for school on the relevant morning that you will be ignoring the door bell between xx and xx time but will answer it after that. Send him a text with this.information as a reminder just before the meeting .

Then just work.and do what you said you would. Do NOT feel guilty if your son is waiting at the door for 15 minutes. Just open the door when it is time, smile, ask about his day as usual.

You offered solutions they are not happy with, if they don't come up with their own solutions, one will happen by default, your son will have to wait

As for your son not wanting to.carry a key in case he loses it, that is really not acceptable long term. He needs to.statt carrying one

My son who has ASD and ADHD carried a key from.when he first started secondary school. Yes he forgot and lost it a couple of times, once when neither dh or I were home when he got in. We had a backup.plan, a spare key in a locked shed in the garden.

Yes he was upset and a bit panicked and he had to ring us at work as he had forgotten about the spare key (.Despite us telling him) and what the combination for the lock was. I calmed him down.on the phone and told him the pin to unlock the shed and he sorted the problem. He had to ring us twice at work as DH was unavailable as he was teaching but he got hold of me. Yes he was upset but he was not in any real danger and he didn't lose his key again.

Yes if you go out and leave the house unlocked. Not if you’re in the house.

Just get a key safe only you know the number for. Dilemma solved. Honestly why do people over complicate such simple situations?

That's good to know, but I would still lock the door anyway due to the way the house is designed.

Someone could nip in unnoticed if I was in my office (upstairs), in the kitchen, in the dining room or in the living room.

Defo just get a key safe

It wouldn’t cross my mind that this would be an issue!

Key safe or he carries a key.
If he loses it, he has to wait for you to finish your meeting, and answer the door.
He’s old enough for that responsibility

Our son has a front door key on a chain attached to the inside on his bag. It also has his locker and bike lock keys on it.

With the older boys we used to hide a backdoor key in the back garden for them to use without being seen.

Key on a stretchy carabiner that is clipped somewhere inside his bag.

But imo people are always disappearing from Teams calls to answer the door for deliveries so are you overthinking it?

Not naive, in fact that’s quite funny given my professional background!

Of course thieves are opportunistic and in and out. But I specifically responded to a poster talking about the effect on an insurance claim. Perhaps you can tell me (the pp I responded to hasn’t) what insurance claim you envisage arising from the few minutes OP will be sitting at her laptop with the front door unlocked.

She can see the path to the front door, which is just to the side of where she sits. Not at all analogous to you leaving your car unlocked and unattended.

Why do you need the door locked if you are home? Never heard of this before.

I got mine one of the stretchy clips like you get for security badges, and he attaches it to an internal zip on his bag. That way he never has to actually remove it from his bag so no chance of losing

Why do you think?
We don't all have houses where the front door is in our line of sight most of the day.

Are you really this naive?

Even low crime rate areas have some level of crime - usually stealing car keys. Living rurally with poor public transport means that it would massively inconvenience me if someone stole my car.

Your Son is old enough to carry a key without losing it surely. Get him a chain clip to clip it to the inside of his school bag if he's that scared of losing it. If he'll not take one to school with him tell him he'll have to wait outside until you finish your meeting. If your DH isn't happy you leaving the door open then I'd not do it.