Husband wants to leave the uk post budget….

[Maryaliceyoungx]

husband wants to leave and don’t get me wrong - I do see why. We are being hammered in the budget, we drive shitty cars, the rain is shit… life in the UK can be pretty shitty right now. he works for a US based company and I am a US citizen as I was born there and spent my life until my early teens there (parents are British and were working out there) so I see why he wants to go -it would be good for his career and would be potential to make money without the huge tax burden of the UK (company based in low state tax state)

but I don’t want to go… I love my life here. I love our village and my kids lovely village school. My family is here and I worry my parents don’t have so much time left.

however i do have to recognise the money aspect- my husbands job could be impacted by AI so i think he is right in thinking we should max out our earning potential while we can and we just won’t be able to do that here as it will just be taxed away.

aibu for sacrificing potentially huge earnings just because I love village life? Would it even be cheaper? I would insist upon private school in the US(went to state school in the us and have a lot of trauma from that!) and we wouldnt sell our house here so would need to rent. Most recent trip to thr us - over a year ago and cost of living was sky high.

I’ll be honest - couldn’t care about the politics. Politics are shit whereever you go!!

My daughter's husband is a US citizen and they had to decide at a certain point in their relationship whether to make a life here or in America.

They chose London and have never regretted it for a wide range of reasons, some of them political but mostly regarding their 2 children.

I think you have to consider many aspects very carefully, not just the financial ones

Haven’t read all the replies so apols if I missed anything but - we’ve decided to leave the UK for the US next year, just bought a house there and are winding up our jobs here. For us, lower taxes weren’t exactly the draw as we’re moving to NYC where they are sky high too, and my husband, who is a top 0.1% earner, will make the same in the US as here roughly. However in my industry, US salaries are 3-5 times higher, so that’s attractive.

That being said, our living costs are about to increase in astronomical ways. Private school alone is $50-70k per child per year, and state schools are not an option really, the few decent ones are so vastly oversubscribed in the cities it’s virtually impossible to get a place. A normal sized family home in a decent enough area on either coast and in many other attractive cities costs millions atm, in our case we’ll be paying $200k mortgage
costs per year, most of which will be interest, and we will live comfortably but not luxuriously (5 bed row house with 3 children, small garden, no private parking, area up and coming rather than posh).
You’ll be aware of the hyper inflated grocery and hospitality prices in the US these days, since 2020 it’s spun entirely out of control. A small fresh juice costs easily $16, a coffee $6-7, a tin of beans $4. These costs vary from state to state a bit but I think the big cities are all roughly the same in this regard.

We have calculated that with health insurance (we’ll be self-employed for starters), school fees, mortgage costs, property taxes, bills and a modest budget for non-essentials, travel and leisure we’ll have an annual burn rate of at the very least $500k as a family of 5. In the UK, we’re taxed to high heavens too but are spending a fraction of this.

If you love your life in the UK I’d stay unless you were planning to move to a very cheap area of the US with similar life quality. The higher living costs in high cost US areas will erode all your salary gains I think. We’re leaving the UK because we really don’t love it here, feel bored and disconnected from the public psyche in Britain, think that London and the country generally are being ruined and have little in common culturally with most colleagues, neighbours and even friends here. We crave the cultural, social and entrepreneurial vibrancy of New York, so for us it’s worth the hassle and enormous extra living costs.

I’d sit down with your husband and make a very careful calculation of what your US life will likely cost and look in more detail at how you’d live, schools and houses and so on. In the abstract it’s impossible to weigh up the pros and cons accurately I think.

Are your children citizens? That’s a huge consideration. It’s crazy over there right now.

My husband and I are American and immigrated to Scotland almost 20 years ago. No regrets at all and we are so grateful for everything we have here when we talk to our family and friends.

Am bewildered that you’re leaving aside politics as that contributes significantly to your quality of life. Access to health care (particularly for women and girls), likeliness of being scooped up in an ICE raid, general safety… these are important. Obviously it depends a lot on where you’re going to live but some things are fairly universal.

Do not underestimate the cost of everything. Working hours are long (for the kind of money it sounds like you’re talking about, be prepared to be single parent) and things like food and clothes are much more expensive. We were back for 3 weeks this summer and couldn’t get over what we were spending. You need to be careful about meat and milk and such too as safety standards are so low - really important for children in particular.

Your husband’s work will provide insurance but you’ll pay for it. Then you’ll pay again and again in copays. Depending on the age of your children it’s worth checking on university as well - they’d count as international students here if they leave when they’re young, and university tuition in the states is extortionate.

Also remember that your husband isn’t likely to have more than 3 or 4 weeks off a year so you’ll need a nanny or similar if you’re planning on visiting your parents often.

Basically start running realistic numbers, consider your children’s citizenship and do some proper research. I highly doubt you’ll be as financially secure as you think (remember also he can be fired for any reason at any time, very few workers’ rights in the states!).

Oh ffs. I want to keep politics out of it because it derails conversations. I went, for a time, through the American state school system and had some really bad experiences hence therefore would insist to my husband he is funding private if he wants to move…. Remember, I don’t want move. My children are currently at state schools here and would continue to be if we stayed.

Fair enough, ignore the jibes.

Would you say the salary and the state you’ll move to, you might get more insight into whether it’s a good package:

I understand and personally I'd give it a go but keep in mind that labour won't be in power forever and this mess will likely be undone.

I admire this way of thinking!
This poster loves stilton. What do you love? Your beautiful village, your kids' school, friends and family. Don't give all that up to pay less tax. It is all an illusion anyway as youll have to pay £££ for education and healthcare and flights home.

What would put people off?

Thank you - this sums up concisely.

funny story / when we moved back from the us my parents had to buy Red Leicester cheese as I so used to my cheese being orange

I wouldn't want to raise a dog in the US let alone children. Don't want to imagine sending them to school (even a private one) or uni and they are killed in a school shooting. Even being shot in a mall. Then there is no maternity leave, no minimum wage, no proper health care as you can't afford it unless you declare bankruptcy. If you have a daughter what happens if she needs an abortion and can't get one? I wouldn't even visit that country, I would never, ever, ever, ever raise a child there. Move to another country, any other country. Australia, New Zealand, Denmark, Switzerland, any other country. Don't risk your lives in the US.

@Maryaliceyoungx you don’t want to leave do you- and that is fine so tell your husband that you don’t want to leave

She said they’ll be “hammered”. That’s extremely unlikely. Even the mansion tax is just £2.5k or at worst £7.5k if the house is >£5m (unlikely as rare in a village) so are these amounts worth leaving the country over? Most people will be slightly worse off, if at all. Yes, gradually drifting into the next tax band over time due to freezes will have some impact on some people due to paying some income at a higher rate meaning less money in their pocket- again not significant amounts that a person might consider leaving the country for. It doesn’t sound like they’re only basic rate tax payers at the moment anyway.

If the op really was going to be so much worse off that it’s lead them to consider emigrating, there’s no reason why she can’t indicate which budget changes have impacted them so badly.

That’s optimistic considering the state the conservatives left the country in after 14 years and the fact that it’s not outside the realms of possibility that reform could be running the country.

Yes I forgot about corn syrup. It’s in a huge amount of stuff in the US yet is consistently ranked as one the most unhealthiest ‘food’ stuffs (if not the most unhealthiest). The US’s food regulations are very inferior to the UK.

Do you have UK citizenship? Are you aware what Reform and to a slightly lighter level labour are wanting to deprived foreign born citizens of. Even if you've been here with Indefinite leave to remain. Even if you are married to a UK citizen.

I have friends who went, took US citizenship. Still working into their 70s just so they can get half decent health care. I retired 20 years before them. They live in AZ half the time they can barely go outside its so hot. A swimming pool they rarely use. Not for me.

Well, you said you're being hammered for tax, and you're thinking og leaving because you're being hammered for tax post-budget, drive shitty cars and the rain is shitty (agreed).

So the net contribution you're making isn't one you're happy to make, to the country you say you love and are proud to have citizenship of.

The country's finances are in such a godawful state because we shut down our economy during the pandemic to protect the old and the vulnerable, and paid businesses to retain staff, to avoid individual household collapse as well as business collapse. Whether individuals agreed with that decision or not, it was the decision that was made. I reckon the majority of people in the country benefitted from it to some degree (we all benefitted from avoiding the wholesale collapse of the employment market), and now no one wants to pay any of it back because we have a national allergy to even the concept of tax.

I am finding it increasingly difficult seeing people that profess to be proud to be British threatening to leave to find a more favourable tax environment (so proud!), or spinning completely fabricated lies about it being lawless or whatever - your post gets caught up in my general frustration with the determined and growing national conversation that talks the country down rather than constructively seeks to build it back up.

I too will be 'hammered' for tax post-budget. I'm an additional rate tax payer in the shitty effective 60% tax band. I'm not just going to get up and leave because you're right, the country does need net contributors, and because there's no other country in the world that I'd rather live right now. The grass isn't greener anywhere else - and in America, it's covered in great big orange dog turds.

I’m proud to be British, we are happy to contribute but if an opportunity arises that could mean better things for you and your family does that make me such an awful person to consider it? I said consider it because ultimately i don’t want to go but i do want to have a healthy pension and to be able to make savings.

I have a US passport which presents itself to having an economic opportunity- doesn’t make me the anti christ.

The absolute number one thing that would prevent me from ever moving to the US is the lack of nutritional food. A cousin nannied there long term a few years ago, in an affluent area, and said it seemed virtually impossible to find quality food. When she mentioned it to a neighbour they said “Well there’s always Whole Foods” which costs an absolute fortune. I’d just worry I was sending my entire family to an early grave/mental health issues/lethargy etc through our terrible diet.

This is a good point. You can find nutritional food but it costs a fortune! I saw a friends grocery bill when I was last over and I was
shocked!

This. So much hyperbole, fuelled by Reform and the media. The UK is not “pressure cooker” 🙄

I think the US is so huge and so varied it would really depends where you were thinking of relocating too. Some states I'd go back to in a heartbeat and others I'd not ever want to live in.

But for me the biggest negative would be distance from family and close friends. How old are you and your parents and are they in good health? Are you close to them?

Even if you can visit a couple of times a year, that's so different from being able to pop and see your parents or a friend when they need you (or you them). No amount of money makes up for missing that.

Sorry OP, you are being a fool to stay in this sinking ship of a country. Your husband is right. This country exists only for those on benefits, not for anyone who has the audacity to earn and pay for themselves. Your children will not thank you for this.

Yep it’s looking absolutely on the edge here in Bath today ( although my sanity is as it’s Xmas market) - Reform are agitators determined to present themselves as white knights, when they are nothing of the sort , Nazis did similar - they were architects of creating a 4- 6% drop in GDP - that’s an awful lot of money/funding for zilch gain whatsoever - simply because they were savvy in knowing that a great many of the British public like to blame others for the country’s issues - rather than accept that non needed austerity, selling off social housing, selling off utilities has been a long term social disaster -

Housing is defo less expensive in many places. Not everywhere, though. The major cities may not be London but they are probably more expensive than anywhere else in the UK. NYC vs London is an open question.

But as PP are saying, food can be very expensive. The nicest places to live tend to have high state income taxes, and the cap on Social Security payments has just been raised.

All of this is before health insurance and property taxes. The latter are often at least 1% the assessed value of your property, each year. (We paid around 2% but my city had a very high quality of life in return. We thought it was worth it)

If DH wants to live in a moderately sized town in the heart of Trump territory, you may be able to achieve a savings. If he would like to live in an attractive urban centre, or the suburbs thereof, he will need a very, very good deal to come out ahead financially.