To think this is a bit much?

[IndecisiveAnxietyLemon]

Hi all.

Not sure if im being unreasonable so here goes.

Partner and i are expecting a baby, I have a high risk pregnancy and i am at higher risk of miscarriage.

Partners DS is 5 and my DSs are 4 and 6. we will name partners DS jamie.

Jamie has been acting up and playing partner and his mum against each other telling her lies such as hes scared of his dad as he shouts at him (he has never ever shouted on him as we have a no shout policy due to my 6 year old being non verbal autistic and terrified of loud noises). Jamie admitted to partner he lied and partner decided we should chat to mum to explain the lying needs to stop.

During this chat my partner has said "ill take jamie an extra night during the week, but it wont always be myself picking him up and dropping him to school she (meaning me) will be doing some of that."

Now, i wasnt ever asked if I was okay to do this and im not particularly pleased about it as partner knows my non verbal child really struggles with car journeys to the point it affects his safety. Not only that, ive been told by consultants and midwives to do no heavy lifting or straining on the abdomen due to a rather large haematoma that may affect the gestational sac.

This is my last pregnancy and first after a miscarriage. I dont know if im being selfish or not but i feel like if hes going to be here an extra day and im having to do all this travelling (40 mins from my house to his school) i just can't enjoy what i can of my pregnancy. We tried for so long for this wee one and now he have it i still cant really enjoy it as i cant live a normal day to day life due to the heightened risk of MC. Not only that, jamie refuses to sleep anywhere else that isnt our bedroom in the house and its always such a task to get in and out of bed with him on air bed as my bedroom isnt very big. I tried asking partner to get him to sleep on sofa but partner just says he wont, Even though he sleeps in his own room at his mums house.

Im trying so hard not to get stressed but with my neuropathic pain issues the small things like struggling to get out of bed make me agony.

AIBU to feel the way i am about everything? 😭

Speak up now before this starts. Tell DP you won’t be able to do the pick ups and he needs to agree with ex how he’ll manage them.

Sorry, but I'm not sure why these sort of Tory principles are particularly bad?! Thinking through the consequences of actions and taking personal responsibility - society would be a lot better if everyone did that!

(Btw I think all political parties are corrupt and things would be a lot better with more cross-party working, but I do agree with people taking responsibility where they can.)

I doubt @IndecisiveAnxietyLemon will be back...

And what exactly made you think this man was a good father and you should have a baby with him? He doesn't prioritise his existing child's needs yet you went on and tried for another and expect this one to sleep on the sofa. He's FIVE. FIVE YEARS OLD. ON THE SOFA.

Obviously you shouldn't be taking on any extra responsibilities but seriously, that poor child. My heart breaks for this confused little boy that nobody wants.

I hope after reading all this, she is having a bloody good think