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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is this dress to casual for a wedding?

125 replies

OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:23

I’m going to a wedding, taking place in a nice hotel in January.
Buffet and DJ, should be done by 11pm.
What do we think? Will this do or is it too casual?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
15
OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:25

Firg to add, here we go.

Is this dress to casual for a wedding?
OP posts:
FrodoBiggins · 17/11/2025 13:26

Can't really see it it's half covered by a scarf thing but it looks OK. Is there a dress code?

MiddleAgedDread · 17/11/2025 13:27

i think it should be ok with the right accessories

DappledThings · 17/11/2025 13:28

Totally fine

OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:36

Fab, I dont actually know the couple. I’m a plus one and my husband is the best man. The dress code is Elegant.

OP posts:
OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:37

I have this in my wardrobe, better or to much? It’s Navy and silver.

Is this dress to casual for a wedding?
OP posts:
DappledThings · 17/11/2025 13:38

OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:36

Fab, I dont actually know the couple. I’m a plus one and my husband is the best man. The dress code is Elegant.

They have actually told people they expect them to look "elegant"? What pretentious crap. Generally smart and elegant the norm for any wedding. You don't have to patronise your guests by telling them that.

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 17/11/2025 13:40

Elegant then I'd say the second

Goditsmemargaret · 17/11/2025 13:40

The second one given the dress code.

HelloCharming · 17/11/2025 13:41

Elegant the second, but I'd worry about being cold in January ....

SodOffbacktoaibu · 17/11/2025 13:44

Wear whichever you're most comfortable in and don't worry about the dress code, especially if you're a plus 1.

I like the first one. Looks comfortable and nice. Second one is more evening wear than wedding but if you fit into that, then I'm sure you'll look lovely! (In case that doesn't sound right, I mean it's that kind of slinky dress you need a good figure for so if you already have it in your wardrobe, I imagine you will look good. )

Myoldbear · 17/11/2025 13:44

Agree second, with a shawl or wrap.

SodOffbacktoaibu · 17/11/2025 13:45

DappledThings · 17/11/2025 13:38

They have actually told people they expect them to look "elegant"? What pretentious crap. Generally smart and elegant the norm for any wedding. You don't have to patronise your guests by telling them that.

Haha...yeah, I don't do elegant I don't think 🤔 😁

MiddleAgedDread · 17/11/2025 13:46

oh if it's elegant and your husband is best man then the second dress.
How do you not know someone that your husband knows well enough to be best man for though??

IvedoneitagainhaventI · 17/11/2025 13:54

I prefer the first, probably because it's more "me".
But the second is more "Elegant" .

PeachyKoala · 17/11/2025 13:54

OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:37

I have this in my wardrobe, better or to much? It’s Navy and silver.

This one is better considering the dress code imo

OnToast81 · 17/11/2025 13:55

MiddleAgedDread · 17/11/2025 13:46

oh if it's elegant and your husband is best man then the second dress.
How do you not know someone that your husband knows well enough to be best man for though??

He commutes for work, it’s a work colleague/good friend but I don’t know anybody he works with.

OP posts:
Floraflower3 · 17/11/2025 13:57

To me the first dress looks more like a summer dress, I would go with the second OP.

SentFromiPhon · 17/11/2025 13:59

How old are you? I think the first one looks a bit frumpy and dated OP, sorry. Looks like office wear.

the second one is more 'elegant' and I think is a much nicer dress.

Deadringer · 17/11/2025 14:00

I prefer the second one but you could certainly wear either.

Clarinet1 · 17/11/2025 14:00

I think either would be fine except I’m not sure about black for weddings. Also, as PP have said, wedding venues may be cold in January but, then again, if it’s crowded with a roaring log fire and you’re dancing it may get very warm so maybe go for some kind of layering.
However, if you do decide to buy something new why not wait for the January sales when there will be lots of reductions of suitable things - I have found Monsoon particularly good for this.

Thebigonesgetaway · 17/11/2025 14:01

The first one I think you attached the wrong photo, it’s got an old scarf covering most of it, so you can’t see the shape or arms etc,

the second one seems quite glitzy, I’d put the right pic of the first ine up.

CountryCousin · 17/11/2025 14:11

The first is a beach dress. The second looks like fancy dress costume. So I wouldn’t wear either to a winter wedding.

For that I would probably choose a fairly severe trouser suit or long sleeved dress in a weighty, seasonally appropriate fabric - cord, velvet, tweed, heavy silk, wool twill. With neither sparkle nor ruffles.

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 17/11/2025 14:11

The second. The first one looks dreary.

SwedishEdith · 17/11/2025 14:17

The second but you'll need a jacket. I feel cold just looking at it on a day like today.

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