To be frustrated by DofE requirements

[Frenchcremefraiche]

My daughter has just turned 15 and is trying to complete (well, START tbh!) her Bronze DofE.

On paper it's fine: learn something and do some volunteering.

In reality it's really, really hard! All suggestions appreciated!

There are so many exclusions to the skill requirement. She doesnt get home from school until 6 which limits evenings. Not that there are many lessons/groups after school anyway. Then there are so few activities that count as a skill on the weekend. Anything vaguely "sporty" doesnt count as a skill even if it's something she's never done before and is going to classes to learn it (eg ice skating). She's been doing online guitar lessons but because she started those before DofE, they dont count. There is a minimum hours requirement and Ive found a few in person classes but they arent long enough. It needs to be something in person because it needs to be signed off so teaching herself or doing something at home wont count.

Then volunteering, because of her age, very few places can help. Any informal groups that are willing to take her want a parent present because they cant take responsibility for her / arent DBS checked etc which I get but obviously she doesnt want me hanging about. It has to be a regular thing so she cant organise eg an afternoon litter pick. Plus she needs someone to sign it off anyway. She looked at helping at a local beaver/scout group but one said no and the other has her ex boyfriend helping so she said no. In her naive 15year old way she wont help at brownies because they are "sexist".

Any suggestions on what she can do? She's on the verge of having to quit because she cant meet the requirements.

Where is she doing DOf E as this does seem u reasonable. Duolingo is definitely allowed under DOf E rules. There are also lots of online cookery courses etc that will sign you off at the end of the 12 weeks as fully compliant with d of E you just need to look them up

Here is some ideas- lots of online ones too (ie cookery course or reading for young kids audio books. Some are a bit pricey but there are lots of free/more inexpensive options. I’m sure she’ll find something!

www.dofe.org/opportunity-finder/opportunity-for-dofe-participant/?&age_opp=14,15&level=bronze

We seem to be getting the same half dozen suggestions being repeated now.

Volunteering my daughter joined a litter picking group. Look on your local Facebook pages. Normally the people who run these groups will be happy to sign her off.
Skills - she did a course for bronze which was done online and endorsed by Dofe which you can find online easily. I paid about £30 and she got a certificate and the teacher at school signed it off.
For gold she continued the litter picking and skills she taught herself crochet and found a neighbour who happily looked at her creations from start to what she'd achieved when she was more skilled and she also signed this off for her.
Do you have any friends or colleagues who could do this for her?
Also, I believe if she is self teaching guitar she can video some of her practices and her DofE teacher can sign this off?

D of E is incredibly easy to get signed off these days - there are, for example, so many online opions.

Either your DD is talking rubbish, or the person who is organising D of E (a teacher at her school?) is talking rubbish. Either way, you're so frustrated because you're trying to jump through hoops that aren't real.

Can you speak directly to the adult in charge and/or some of the other parents? Something isn't adding up here.

This is what I'm thinking

You don't have to do regular organised learning sessions with a teacher or tutor

Volunteering doesn't need to be in person

They just need someone who isn't related and has appropriate knowledge to sign it off

Are you sure she really wants to do it OP? Because if she did she should suck up her issues with Explorers or Brownies and try those

Connect with a local Tidy Towns committee and do something with them each week - planting bulbs, mulching beds, moving leaves off of paths etc.
Go on local facebook pages and offer her time for helping locals out with shopping etc. Those you've asked might not need the help, but there will be others who will be appreciative.
You could also ask on there for any local businesses that would help sign her off with a skill. Local florists, sweeping at the hair salon etc etc

Sorry you feel that way about it. To offer a different perspective for me, it made me. I started volunteering for bronze doing habitat management work with a local wildlife trust -a day once a month. Discovered a passion for the environment which basically informed every life choice I made since. Completed silver and gold, studied an Environmental science degree and have worked in the sector for nearly 30years. I'm now acting as authenticator for my local school with my own 13y old embarking on bronze.

Wrt OP you definitely can do online skills, my son is enrolled in a 13week online cookery course which is aimed at dfe kids and provides sign off. He will continue with rugby for his physical and is exploring options for volunteering. He's hoping he might be able to offer help to our local lifeboat service, or might help as a young leader with scouts, but his school has also provided lots of options for helping in the library, litter picking, helping with clubs, lunch service etc (all of which he regards as last resort) but are options.

Oh, and Im sure a teacher who does a lunchtime club would be appreciative of some help as well if she asks around

My son did music lessons for his skill and volunteered at park run.

something is not adding up here as previous posters have pointed out.

i wonder how your DD is coming across OP. Her comment about “smelly” charity shops doesn’t paint her in the best light and if her disdain came across when she went in and asked about volunteering there no wonder they didn’t accommodate her, even though you have said she is polite.

Has anyone mentioned Bee Walk? That’s good for volunteering. Cooking for a skill, easy to record.

For volunteering use Zooniverse. It’s a brilliant free online platform where you can count penguins, woodpeckers, etc all of which aides research. It’s recognised by DofE and your daughter can do it in her own time wherever she is. We got told about online cookery courses too that partner with DofE which you can do for skills. Our local one was really expensive though so didn’t do it but they may vary in price. DofE can be an absolute ball ache.

We did cooking but at home, easy to record with pictures, video & diary.

In my local area kids have done: helping at the foodbank, Non -uniformed youth clubs, helping at the local allotments, kids sports coaching, pet walking/looking after, elderly companion.
I hope some of these ideas help.

At the end of the day, DofE is hard work and teaches a lot of skills, independence, determination and creativity in young people. It pushes them to do things and go places and be with people they may not choose to ordinarily. That's a Good Thing.

Perhaps we should make all exams and school easier to get through, because, you know, it's hassle.

YABU - get your daughter to solve the problems, don't do it for her. That's the point.

I can't see why online guitar lessons wouldn't be acceptable for the skill. It doesn't have to be a new skill, you just have to show development over the 3 months.

Volunteering at park runs or litter picking or reading at a primary school.

Skill was cooking at home.

Who is she doing this through, is it her school? If so, it’s the school making up these extra rules, it’s definitely not a DofE thing. My son has done bronze and silver and for bronze he did his volunteering with his martial arts group (which he had been doing for about 8 years prior). He is a leader so was mentoring younger groups and helping with teaching them. This was signed off and approved. His skill for bronze was learning how to look after a car, ie replace oil, change tyre, check pressures, learn about various engines parts etc, this was signed off by a family friend who confirmed he had actually learnt all this and this was also allowed. For his silver he did about 9 months volunteering at one of his schools after school sports clubs, helping the teachers with teaching the younger kids basketball (a sport he can play very well). All of this was approved and signed off by the school and DofE people were all happy with it too. So I’d definitely read up on the actual DofE rules (not what the school tells you) and then speak to the school about the fact that they are not being very flexible or helpful.

If none of that works and the school still won’t help then she could speak to her Explorers leader as you can also do DofE through the scouting organisation?

A friend’s son also did cooking at home as his bronze skill, he learnt how to do 3 different 3 course meals and his Explorer leader signed that off as approved, as he saw videos/photos of him doing it and actually tasted the food when it was brought into their explorers meeting. This friends son also then did his silver the following year and his volunteer part was helping at the scout group that was associated with his own explorers group.

Yes this. @Frenchcremefraiche is her school running DofE? They’re being incredibly literal. My DS did bronze in Y9 and his skill was doing some baking at home. He took photos, sent them to a family friend, she logged in to the website and signed it off. It was in hours but as he did some elaborate bakes I think he maybe only did 4 bakes but it was enough hours. His volunteering was Junior parkrun on a Sunday morning but not every week, enough to have 10 sessions or whatever over 6 months. We don’t have a car. He got himself there by running or bike (with a friend). Your dd could definitely do the guitar lessons, loads of his friends just counted their ongoing instrument learning as their skill.

I remember when my daughter started it and brought home the info..it was a bit overwhelming. I had no idea how she was going to fit it in or even find anything.. she had really long days in the week, school was an hour away, she had sports matches at weekends and I also had her little brother to ferry around too as my husband was away a lot. We also lived in a small village without much to offer. When she and I went to the Palace for her to receive her Gold award a few years later, I felt like I should have got one too, esp for the early days when she was not as proactive and independent. Anyway from memory..for skills she did a sign language course, a musical instrument she had already been learning and a first aid course (sorry can't remember the order). Volunteering..for bronze she helped with the little ones at a sports club on Friday evenings as she had no after school stuff on Fridays (it was freezing I remember as it was winter and I had to stand there and watch or sit in the car). Silver she visited elderly people in a residential home once a week. The handy thing about that was that the day could vary from week to week depending on her and my schedule. She just had to be organised and confirm the day for the following week with the matron at the end of each week's visit. We found that volunteering opportunity by contacting a local charity who visited elderly people in their homes. She was too young to do that but they put us in touch with the home. And for gold, for a whole year I think, she worked in an elderly lady's large garden, sorting out whatever needed doing for her, like cleaning her bins or painting or weeding or mowing the grass. It was during covid so she could not go inside or use the toilet or have a drink as the lady was isolating. That was tough for my daughter when the weather was wet or cold but she went every week come rain or shine and the lady was so grateful. And that was in the village so I did not have to drive her yay!! Anyway, good luck! I hope your daughter sticks with it. Once you get into the flow of coming up with ideas it does get easier. And my daughter enjoyed it, esp the expeditions and, the icing on the cake was when she had an interview for an internship after her first yr at uni she was very amused that they only wanted to talk about DoE (they were foreign I think).

Do you have a church nearby? Even if you aren't religious there is loads of volunteering to be done there.

Me too re aged care, and I did some very random baroque dancing classes as a skill one year. My calves were sore despite how slow it all was 😁
respectfully, re the brownies, it’s time to tell her that she clearly doesn’t want her Duke of Ed award enough, and you won’t gloss over it with others by lies like ‘just couldn’t make it work’ when she absolutely could but chose not to, and also that she’s quite judgemental so some actual experience would probably be really good for her.

are there any Christmas related volunteering? Holidays events for kids, gift wrapping at shops for charity, making and handing out hampers…

Could she do this? https://www.freebmd.org.uk/Signup.html ? I've done it in the past. Flexible and easy to do from home. Perhaps the person she reports to could sign off on it for her?