Why is everyone away with the fairies?

[xAwaywiththefairiesx]

Is it just me or have listening skills and attention spans declined rapidly in the last 10 years or so?

Nobody bloody listens or retains information any more.

Yesterday, I was at work. Patient transport turns up with a patient to transfer to us. I said, "Oh hi, have you got Mr Smith?" (All names have been changed) and the man says "yeah".
OK, great. I ring for the staff in the department that need to collect Mr Smith while patient transport guy goes to collect Mr Smith from the ambulance. I start typing up the paperwork to admit Mr Smith.
Our staff come down, with the necessary equipment to transport Mr Smith, and just then, who should come through the doors but a perfectly mobile Mrs Jones??!!
I said "that's not Mr Smith!!" and he said "nah" I asked him why he said it was and he just shrugged.
So I have to send the staff back again, with their equipment, get hold of the staff that need to collect Mrs Jones, and wait for them to come down.
All the while patient transport is stood there tapping his foot and looking at his watch like he has no idea it was him that caused the delay.

This is just one irritating incident. I find noone takes in information, noone listens, I have to send people times, dates etc 100 squilion times before it goes in. The parents WhatsApp group is full of questions the school has emailed to everyone already and all day long at work people reply to my emails asking stuff that is in the email they are replying to.
My husband has asked me three times today what shifts I am working next week.
The delivery people will completely ignore notes telling them where to leave parcels.
People in shops just stare blankly at you when you ask them very simple questions, or ask you to repeat yourself because they weren't listening.

I bet even on this thread, mumsnetters will comment having not read it properly.

Is everyone just away with the fucking fairies?!

My listening and attention skills have markedly declined. I blame it on chronic stress, cognitive overload and depression and menopause. And on social media habits which are attention murderers. I have started to wean myself off social media, start the day with a meditation, increase activity in the day and started to build better habits.

I think I actually know where you're coming from OP.

I think people have simply stopped caring, they want instant information when they want it. They don't want it in advance and have to retain it.

Like a living Google.

It's like when my manager texts me for my email address when I know he has it already. He just can't be arsed to look for it. Or texts me asking for a specific date when I've given it already and all he has to do is scroll back through his texts.

People's minds are full of clutter.

And young people often get blamed for this when actually it's all ages. I once came home to find my MIL had popped round to see DH with a letter she was worried about. It had given some information in the first paragraph that she didn't understand, DH was on his phone, trying to find an answer on google. Both of them, sat at the dining table, debating what to do next.
I picked up the letter, and read it. Everything she needed to do was explained, very clearly, in paragraph 2.
I showed them, problem solved. They were like "oh good, thanks for your help" and I'm like, wtf did I even help with? I just read you something that you already had access to?
MIL had actually sat there worrying about it, then got up, got in her car, driven about 10 minutes, came to see DH, instead of just reading on.
DH had used his phone instead of just reading on.

Tell me this isn't concerning.

I don't do that! I would check the details before emailing someone.

But human nature is to take shortcuts, so people won't always read things properly. So if you can phrase things in a way that reduces the likelihood of a shortcut leading to a misunderstanding it's worthwhile.

I agree it can be annoying when people appear to outsource their thinking.

Yes I've noticed this so much within the last couple of years.

I swear people being on their phones a lot is part of the problem it always seems to be anyways when I go out,I'm ill now and in a wheelchair and my DH pushes me(in the wheelchair)😁 and the amount of people that go to walk into me and then want to blame me for them not looking despite the fact that my DH and myself have tried to make them aware that they're about to end up on my lap.

Most are on their phones the rest are on another planet.

Yes, the classic inability to scroll.

Drives me mad.

I am so petty, I won't repeat myself when people ask me a question they could just scroll to get the answer to. I scroll for them, screenshot me already telling them, then send the screenshot of me already telling them the answer.

I see people do stuff like this and I can relate to your reaction as I have been that "problem solver" for others.

I cannot adequately explain, other than to say that some people panic and therefore don't read through properly once the panic sets in, some people have bad habits about not reading properly/thoroughly, some people are used to getting other people to help them as soon as something worries or confuses them so they don't try to continue with resolving the problem themselves (even where that only means reading paragraph 2), and many people are less meticulous than you and I might default to being.

I’m 31. I don’t need to carry ID into every shop I run in to. I assumed the lighters would be near the tills which they were. Hence not being able to get one. Try again

If you don't already use it, you might like this then:

https://letmegooglethat.com/

You see every day on here -

OP: My DD is 7. Blah blah school blah blah best friend blah blah teacher blah blah....
First response: How old is she?

It's like when my manager texts me for my email address when I know he has it already. He just can't be arsed to look for it.

It's not all a recent thing. Many years ago I had a job which involved coding information for data input. Some of the codes came up so often I just remembered them rather than having to look them up each time. We all had our own copies of the coding manuals on our desks, but some of my co-workers, once they realised I knew them, just kept asking me, instead of looking them up, or taking the trouble to remember them, themselves.

But I do agree people these days are just generally less aware of what's going on around them, probably due to having their faces stuck in their phones so much.

I agree with you op. 5 minutes spent reading mn threads proves you are correct!
Re the scenario you described I think you’d get on better if you asked “who have you brought with you?” Rather than “Have you got Mr Smith?” That way the other person has to do some thinking.

Yep, literally every thread, there's several people asking questions already answered in the OP.

I don't get it. Why are you skim reading Mumsnet?? It's a leisure activity? Why are you rush reading?

Are people just more interested in taking than listening? I don't know.

My favourites are when people think they've caught you out and say "well, you should have... So it's your fault!" When you clearly explained exactly why you didn't.

Im thick and everyone else is smart.
So i will stay in my indoors bubble and avoid the world.

Nobody can concentrate because of the distraction of smartphones. It’s literally re wiring our brains. Imagine what the children who’ve been on tech since babies are going to be like…

Oh yes. This.

I get this 100%.

Circulated papers to 5 peolle at work last week. The decision makers on various projects. Every question asked was already answered in the papers.

Hubby has to have information repeated 3, 4, 5 timesto sink in.

It's endless and exhausting being other peoples brains. Gah.

And the reason why they use a million different ways is because if they stick to one, people don't pay attention to it.

As per the emails sent from a phone perfectly capable of running the messaging app complaining that they don't have a messaging app login, which are sent with the messaging app activation email in the email chain. Or the emails from a different email address wanting to know why they aren't receiving emails anymore. Or the complaints that they weren't phoned when they went into the app and deleted the phone number or changed it to their spouse's, rather than adding their spouse's details as a second contact. Or the complaints about it not being included in the newsletter, written on the back of the newsletter where it's the first item on the page...

I haven’t experienced anything like this, so I do think this must be a “you” problem.

I do think PP are right, it’s the way you are communicating. Stop volunteering information for people to confirm or correct you, ask more open ended questions. make sure you have full attention of who you are asking a question of, be clear in what you say. I think perhaps being a bit louder and slower would be a good start.

You don't have to be "smart" to be able to answer a very simple question.

Is the person you have just loaded onto the back of the vehicle you are driving called George Smith or Elizabeth Jones?

I mean surely you can see if it is a man or a woman?

If not I'm not even sure how you manage to drive a large vehicle?

It really isn't a 'you' problem at all just because you haven't noticed it or has the same experience yet, doesn't mean it's not happening.

Maybe you're just unobservant.

I’ve only read 75% of your OP but I fully agree with you. I don’t know how I manage every day.

Thing is some of us get called racist or bigots for using the wrong pronuns or having an opinion.
Someone like me i just need a little longer to understand thing.

All in all i`ll stay a introvert some would call a hikikomori.

Why didn't you look for them near the tills then? You would indeed only need ID for buying age-verification items, not necessarily every shop you run into. You obviously know you are 31. The assistant doesn't, nor do the shop's rules.

Social media has ruined our attention spans.

Overload.

The world and everyday life has become complex, full on and over stimulating.

Human brains are not designed to run at this capacity 100% of the time.

So everyone is tired, distracted, worn down, snappy, rude, unable to concentrate and pissed off.