To think perhaps my son isn’t autistic but instead modern society is too challenging for him to cope with.

[SpinningTops]

My son is 7 and on the long waiting list for an autism assessment.

Sometimes I wonder whether he would cope absolutely fine if he was an 80s or 90s child. Maybe it’s rose tinted glasses but modern life seems so chaotic and jam packed, so much to learn at school etc.

He’s in a small class at school and seeing the number of children struggling, so many with ‘special jobs’ to just get them into the classroom, makes me think something is wrong with the system rather than all these children being neurodiverse. And this is an absolutely wonderful school which outwardly he says he loves.

It’s just something I’ve been thinking more and more about recently …

As I said, not ALL cases. But ADHD is being diagnosed in an ever increasing number of children and younger people and I do believe it’s a huge factor in this.
I think that there’s probably different ‘types’ of ADHD and that the one we are seeing such an increase in is due to screen usage.

There’s absolutely no way that all ADHD is exactly the same. At the end of the day, it’s just a name given by doctors to describe a pattern of behavioural traits. The causes of those traits are bound to vary hugely. At school in the 80’s, the ADHD kids (undiagnosed in those days) stuck out like a sore thumb when you look back, but there was usually 1-2 in a whole year group. They had very obvious issues.

I really do think a new branch of ADHD will be recognised in years to come and it will specifically be related to brain changes due to screen usage. This will become an ever-increasing problem as screens continue to dominate lives.

ADHD is under diagnosed and under treated in this country.

No they all didn’t stand out like a sore thumb. There was huge ignorance as regards how it presents in women and girls who went completely under the radar. We know better now but still it is under diagnosed and under treated.

Screens definitely cause behavioural issues so maybe there's an argument that they exacerbate what we see as bad behaviour. Screens do NOT cause neurodevelopmental conditions that people are born with. So it's what's we 'know' as bad behaviour, and the assumptions that go along with that and how we perceived people who are neurodivergent with screens v people who are not neurodivergent with screens - not what we 'know' about ADHD.

I mean is it ‘ignorance’ or is it the fact this fairly nebulous condition seems to have come out of nowhere in the last 5 years alone and frankly all the ‘research’ is quite tenuous and the symptom net is ever widening? Nothing I’ve seen convinces me people have ‘different brains’, whether that’s for gender related issues or this. We seem to be convincing people at the drop of a hat that they are ‘differently wired’ when we have zero evidence of this.

So you think ADHD and autism don’t exist- okaaaay.🙄

And as for nebulous. Do educate yourself.

It hasn’t come out of nowhere, both have been around for over a hundred years and medication with Ritalin started in the 60s .

There is evidence that autistic people have differently wired brains. The Autistic Brain by Temple Grandin is quite an interesting book.

Here’s an article talking about her MRI showing the differences in wiring in her brain

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/05/01/autism-temple-grandin-brain/2122455/

So why aren’t we simply using brain scans to diagnose it?

If society was set up to accommodate difference it wouldn't be as much of an issue for many people but the most severe presentations. As it is, it's called a spectrum for a reason and people need the diagnosis to access support to help them manage the condition in a society that doesn't adequately accommodate. I always thought my daughter had seemed to escape the family cluster of neurodivergence but it's becoming evident she probably hasn't, in many ways she's a carbon copy of my ADHD sister 25 years ago. So now I'm watching and waiting, and trying to weigh up whether it's worth putting her on a waiting list and putting her through a diagnosis process, or trying to support her and advocate for her until such times as we have a clearer picture. Her school is supportive for the more 'minor' things we've identified to support her learning but we're well aware of the issues in schools. My number one concern is that she gets any and all support she might need to manage the things she finds more difficult because the world is set up for a kind of person that she is not (and neither am I frankly).

So maybe instead of continually resisting the idea of neurodevelopmental difference, we could accept that it IS a thing and try to be a supportive society.

I don’t believe they exist in the prevalence that people think they do now.

I think as OP says, people are overwhelmed by modern life and technology and this is manifesting as ‘ADHD’.

I think there has always been classic Asperger types (boy at school with a briefcase springs to mind) plus autism with learning difficulties. But I don’t really believe that 1/4 of children are autistic (current stat in DD class at school). I just don’t, sorry.

It's possible for both things to be true. I do feel that modern life makes things harder for everyone and maybe causes earlier burnout for ND people. We used to have better odds of making it to adulthood and THEN have a burnout!

I’m sorry but your ignorance on this is outstanding. I have lived my life for the majority of time with late diagnosed ADHD and possibly autism,

I was academically high achieving. Yet the difficulty of living with these things has led me to underachieve at work, fail in many of life’s tasks and been suicidal at times

With an ADHD diagnosis so much makes sense. It’s enabled me to successfully navigate and cope with life..

Im gobsmacked people are so poorly educated that they still think ADHD/ND is. Somehow made up. It’s so fucking insulting

What kind of person is it set up for? Does anyone here feel the world is set up for them?

Only 1% of children have an autism diagnosis in this country. The wait lists for diagnosis are dreadful and again there has been and still is huge ignorance in how it presents in girls.

Second how do you know the exact diagnosis details of children in your DD’s class? If you do know intimate details as regards diagnoses there is an issue with privacy and data security at your DD’s school.

Thirdly the data from your DD’s class doesn’t speak for the whole county as illustrated by the actual figures.

Huge cost and early stages of understanding I’d guess.

The person I’ve linked to thinks in pictures so to be expected that the wiring in her visual cortex is so extensive, whereas others, like my son, are pattern thinkers - I think they would need many more decades of research to be able to accurately diagnose on scans alone due to the many different types of brain. What I’m saying is that there is evidence their brains are different which is what you said there was no evidence for.

I’ve just looked and a private fMRI scan is £1200. I doubt there’d be enough machines to scan everyone on the waiting list.

Then either the statisticians should resign in disgrace or I am an exceptional fluke in that I know 7 children with autism diagnoses, out of about 50 in total (DD class at school plus relatives and a few families we know socially). 1 more is pending diagnosis.

I absolutely refuse to believe it is 1% given my own experience and the experiences of everyone I know and read about online. Every other poster on here has a child with autism, ADHD or both, and it’s reached the point I am genuinely surprised to ever open a thread and not see it mentioned. I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way.

So there isn’t an ‘autistic brain’ as such just variances from person to person? Wouldn’t that apply to everyone?

It's set up for people who don't have executive dysfunction, auditory processing difficulties or sensory processing disorders to start with. We know the world doesn't accommodate physical difference, and you think it magically accommodates neurodevelopmental differences? It's not 'oh none of us likes loud noises' or 'many people communicate differently' as isolated traits - it's how you function in the world with a neurodevelopmental difference.

I think the difference between an ASD diagnosis and no ASD diagnosis can be illustrated by this story:

DD3, aged 8. It's Christmas Jumper day. DD3 has some issues with seams so doesn't have a 'Christmas Jumper' but she does have a couple of jumpers that she can wear and we have some tinsel. I spend 2 hours trying to help her decide what to wear and getting her ready for school.

Eventually, we walk through the school office door at 9.00, with two jumpers, a piece of tinsel and a hairbrush in a plastic bag, and I say "She hasn't had breakfast, her hair isn't brushed, I couldn't get a jumper on her, but we're on time."

Two hours later, I have an answerphone message from the head teacher saying, "You did the right thing. Don't worry. She's wearing the silver jumper, I've done her hair, and we sneaked into the kitchen to steal a chocolate brownie for breakfast."

DD3, aged 16. ASD, ADHD, OCD and PTSD now diagnosed. Goes to an independent special school for children with adverse educational experiences.

Yesterday was Pudsey day. Children could wear pyjamas to school. We had gone out and chosen pyjamas that DD3 liked and could wear in school.

DD3 got the pyjamas on and came to show me them. Then she said "I don't like the change..." I immediately said 'take them off and put your uniform on then. It's not compulsory.' Relieved DD3 changed.

The difference is that I knew that her ASD would make her struggle and I didn't try to persevere with a fruitless task.

When DD3 was 8, I was told she was 'fine', 'highly strung', 'sensory', etc.

Now we know she was masking all her difficulties and we were pushing her and pushing her through.

She a smart cookie, a hard worker, a perfectionist. She broke in year 9.

I think technology has become a double edged sword especially around young people. I do believe it affects the brain in all age groups.

In the nursery if you pick up the tablet to do an observation or photo they crowd around because they recognise what it is and ask for shows. ND children are also drawn to technology even more than NT children.

Children are generally getting less unmanaged time. They are kept busy and stimulated from babies in childcare to school children in wrap around and clubs. There is less time to use their imagination compared to the generations before.

Who specifically? Does anyone here feel this applies to them?

No, there won’t be a single type of autistic brain, just like there won’t be one type of neurotypical brain. And there will be overlap to an extent.

But what I’m saying is that there is evidence that there are differences. And I believe these are at a significant level. I can’t remember details from the book, but many autistic brains and many neurotypical brains were scanned and differences were found.

Perhaps have a read of the early chapters. It is interesting.

Was just talking about this with my husband the other night. Kids brains are being damaged by the technology and the lack of engagement with things that we took for granted in the 70s/80s (freedom both physically and mentally) and I worry about the damage that we will be seeing over the next 10-20 years as it becomes more obvious. Kids are being pushed constantly, to do more, learn more, not be bored, be busy. The ND boom is more about technology affecting developing brains, and children struggling with our modern world. I feel so sad for young families now, it’s so horribly hard just to enjoy life.

Modern life puts a lot of pressure on people. The pressure to fit within structured school and societal norms and pipelines.
Those who are different in more ways ....often buckle under the pressure.

Have a look at what autism looks like (whilst keeping in mind that it's unique in the way it is for each individual). Join an autism group and speak to the coordinators so you do an informal self-assessment for your child.

Speaking from lived experience. I am glad we got a diagnosis. It helped my child and me understand them as an individual and to help them navigate life. If your child is ASD you will, likely, hit crisis at transitional points in their life...and it's better to know and work to get through now, together.

Same! Plus there was a lot more structured learning to the school day in Primary School as well as more rote learning, so very much routine based, which would be more helpful to those who may be neuro-diverse.