To think it's weird not to know which school year your DC is in?

[AnnaQuayInTheUk]

I bumped into someone I hadn't seen for couple of years yesterday. Normal catch up chit chat. I asked how her DS was (she only has one DC) and asked whether he was now in Y8 or Y9 at school. She has to think about it then asked"he turns 14 in January, does that make him Y8 or Y9?". I had to tell her Y9.

My DC left school years ago but I always knew which year they were in at any given point. I was really surprised she didn't seem to know. Is she unusual or aren't people really aware? She's a lovely, bright woman so no issues with memory etc.

Also, I find random catchup chit chat/small talk extremely stressful and anxiety ridden sometimes - my mind goes blank, and I'll say something silly, then I'll spend the next 6 months(years even!) in embarrassment that I couldn't remember what score my kid got in a test or something. Thanks for showing that that embarrassment is warranted because the other person may well go on an internet forum and make judgmental unnecessary bitchy snipes about me!

I would have been similar when mine was in 8/9, those years were so alien to me. I could have said 2nd year/3rd year but I couldn't get my head around years 8 - 13.

I was a bloody good parent though and very involved all the way through.

It is weird not knowing.

Everyone saying "it was different when i was at school so cant get my head around it" need to all give themselves a shake.

Loads of life is different from when we were kids, but you figure it out, surely something as meaningful to your kids life as what school they are in is worth to 5minutes it would take understand the years at your kids school.

Some people just don't have instant recall of every little thing in their lives. Doesn't make them weird or bad parents or whatever. Judging people on that basis however, makes you a bit of a dick. I know both of my kid's DOBs but as they are close together in terms of the day and month I usually have to take a second to remember which one is which.

Why is the labelling of a year group “meaningful”? As opposed to to the substance of what and how they’re actually doing at school?

I doubt there are many parents of schoolchildren who were in school when years were called grades, my mother was and she knew third form meant year 9 I mean it’s not rocket science.

The only person I know who dosent know their kids school year is an alcoholic an absolute mess, that and some dads but that of course dosent matter because the parenting bar is lower for them 🙄.

Anyway HOW can you not know what year your kid is in when the school sends a million emails a day, when every year there’s different shit going on like for example now they’re in year 3 they do swimming or now they’re in year 4 they have to wear ties etc and yes I have multiple kids.

There's a difference between not knowing at all and not having instant recall of it. I will sometimes just know the answer is year 5 instantly and sometimes have to take a second to mentally process "year before leaving. Last year is 6. Is it 6? Yes, so he's in 5 now".

Sounds like the woman from the OP was just having that kind of moment

I can’t remember and often asking ds

o could when more directly involved in day to day schooling

She probably does know and just blanked especially since your schools aren't long back. Stand down.

😂 No this kind of thing happens to me a lot! She probably knows full well what year her child is in but sometimes when you unexpectedly run into someone especially someone you haven’t seen in a long while your mind goes into overdrive and you temporarily forget the daftest of things. You are too busy trying to rapidly recall information about them!

I know ADHD people who struggle with exactly this. It's not always alcohol-related as a pp said.

I doubt there are many parents of schoolchildren who were in school when years were called grades, my mother was and she knew third form meant year 9 I mean it’s not rocket science

Of course there are! I was in fifth year when it changed to year 11 and I have two kids at school.

So seeing as you were 15/16 when it changed you should know how it works, my year were the test year for changing gcse grades from letters to numbers so only maths and English were graded in numbers. Your brain is very flexible at that age. Someone your age dosent have the excuse of “oh I’m a sweet old lady and it was so different back in my day”

I was the same! It got very confusing for those used to a normal school system. My mum was a teacher in a normal school and I went to one with funny names for year groups so I think she said something like 'third year of secondary' to refer to it.

I cannot stand people like this!

I regularly forget my own age (I either add or remove a year for some reason), but never my kids ages or school year. I did draw a complete blank on my DS DOB when we went to register him after he was born but I blame that on lack of sleep and hormones 😂

Perimenopause? Honestly I blank on stuff like that all the time. I also say the wrong words like today “look at that review”. I meant “view”. Ffs.

Definitely guilty of this when mine were at school. Year numbers didn't exist in this way in my school days. You were in '1st year infants' or '4th year juniors' etc. and I still think in this way!

You don’t get ‘put down a year’ in the UK

Maybe she’s on medication or has a medical issue. Epilepsy drugs can make you forget your own name at times. Or perhaps she’s got menopausal brain fog. None of your business, unless you’re worried about the child. Stop judging.

Posters claim everyone knows the year groups as 1-13 and don’t even think about the old system - and yet there are still Sixth Form Colleges.

I remember the day my mum had to ask me if I was in year 4 or year 5. I've never forgotten how it made me feel.

Especially since she'd been a very obsessive mom up until I got to age 10 and became too old to be interesting. It was like a punch to the gut.

My mum wished me happy birthday on Facebook once and got my age wrong! I thought it was funny! Mums can be forgetful, perhaps she had a lot on that day?

meaningful/important, you get what i mean. It something that is relevant to your child, how is that not worth knowing?

I do "know how it works" but when put on the spot I very much have to translate year 13 into "upper sixth" (despite a brief sojourn in year 11, we went back to lower and upper sixth for sixth form). Then I left school and didn't have to think about year names for 20 years.
"Someone my age"

She could have just been having a bit of a mind blank? Someone at work yesterday asked me what year my kid is in and I did have to really think about it for a minute. I do know what year he's in but I have a busy job and so much other stuff going on on my life sometimes my brain just doesn't seem to work properly 😆