Parking wars

[Whoosher]

Another parking thread I’m afraid. Am I within my rights to ask someone not to park outside my door all day..?
backstory:

We live in a semi detached townhouse with a drive and on street parking, our drive is really thin with a metal gate down the neighbours side, my car doesn’t fit on it - I can’t open the doors both sides, and have 5 children including a baby in a car seat who I can’t get in or out if I park on the drive. So DH parks on the drive and I park on the street directly outside of my house. Attached neighbour parks on the street directly outside of their house. The drives are to the sides of the house so where we park is literally outside of our doors.

My DC go to a school that I have to drive to, but there is a school at the end of the joining road to ours, so at school drop off and pick up time lots of cars come and park on our road and the surrounding roads. I leave for school just as these parents are arriving, so once I’m gone someone parks outside of my house but this causes no issues as they’re always gone by the time I get home.

However, for the past couple of weeks I’ve noticed a car parking on our road and staying there all day - I think they work at the school. The last few weekdays she’s arrived just as I’m getting in the car, she waits for me to go then parks outside my house and stays there all day. I know I don’t own the road and it’s not legally my space, but it’s a big inconvenience as I then have to park down the road, which is annoying when I’ve got a baby in a car seat. When I get shopping etc, I have to either leave the baby in the car down the road or in the house while I go up and down the road bringing the shopping in. I’m always lugging things in and out the car - car seats for older kids etc and it’s annoying especially when it’s raining.

There are plenty of on street spaces that aren’t directly outside of someone’s front door, and she can clearly see that I’ve got a baby.. AIBU to ask her to park somewhere else if she’s going to be there all day?

Street parking is fair game. Nobody owns it and nobody is entitled to a particular spot. Any member of the public is just as entitled to use it as you are.

Even if you prefer a particular parking spot on a public road you’re no more entitled to it legally or morally than anyone else.

Start leaving 15-30 minutes earlier. Hopefully someone else will start parking there and she won’t have the patience to wait for them to walk their child to the school and back.

Or buy a house away from a school. Or with two properly-sized parking spaces (where you can actually open the car doors).

you can of course ask. she can of course refuse.

You could ask really nicely and see what she says.
When she's sitting in the turning circle waiting for you to leave are there no other spaces free? If there are other spaces free she might be happy enough to park somewhere else.
If it was me and you asked me I'd tell you that I'd try to park elsewhere but if no where else was free I'd be parking there as it's a public road and therefore free parking.

But I wouldn't have bought a house near a school without a residents only parking zone and I wouldn't have bought a house where I couldn't get a larger car on the drive if I had 5 children and needed to be able to get them and shopping and whatever in and out of the car easily.

Yes she can park there, no it’s not yours etc etc

But I’d politely say the above and that you’d appreciate if she could choose another spot.

Legally she can park on a public road.
I agree with the Pp who said you need to break the pattern. Can your DH adjust his work hours to be home when you leave , so he takes your space immediately you leave, or even before? ( park across your drive for the 2 minutes it takes to load up) .

Getting shopping delivered once a week if hardly going to help … and why should she? To facilitate someone else’s parking?!?

Just park across your drive, with your bumper touching her car.

I went on a viewing to a lovely house once.

Then I looked around the street. Every car had its own (narrow) driveway and the only bit of kerb parking on the entire street was a tiny bit next to the house we were looking at.

Could see instantly it would be the source of endless annoyance so that house got taken off the possibles list, sadly.

Yes you can ask her and she can then rightly tell you to go forth and multiply... even more than you already have done.

Realistically all you can do is complain to the local council about teachers parking down the road and ask if they will make it residents parking only. But they only consider doing this if it's a big problem. Based on what you have said that does not seem to be the case.

I would and have asked someone to park more considerately. My house is in a block of 5 terraced houses. Someone kept parking in the middle of mine and my neighbours( so not directly outside mine or hers) It made it impossible for either of us to park. I very politely asked him if he could park directly outside one or other of the houses so at least one of us ( me or neighbour) would have a parking space. He apologised and parked with more consideration from then on.

I’d do the same if there were other spaces, kindness costs nothing.

We’ve lived in the same house for 20+ years. Mixed parking, some with drives, some, like ours have a small drive, not big enough for even a small car. The number of cars has really increased as younger families have moved in. Our neighbours are pretty considerate of each other, so we can usually park outside. We try and park as near home as possible, and DH will move our car to outside our house any time there’s a space.

I have a blue badge, and we are considering having a disabled bay, but it’s very expensive in our locality, and it wouldn't give me priority over any other blue badge holder. Difficult to walk far on my crutches! It’s the only downside to living where we do.

I would see if your partner could go to work slightly late for a few days, so he can take the the kids to school and your car doesn’t move at that time

I think it's unlikely she's given any thought whatsoever to who you are or where you're going, she's probably worried about her day, getting parked and getting into work. I think the idea she'd have looked at you, guessed at who you are and where you're going, then decided her parking habits based on that is really not reasonable.
I'd ask her, but the reality is, if she's waiting for your space then there's a reason she wants it, either the other spaces are inconveniently far away for her, or there aren't many easy ones/options. It's odd to me that you're saying there's lots of parking options but she's still hanging about it the road for your specific spot... maybe that's because she's weird, or maybe the parking is more tricky than it initially sounds. If I were you, I'd work with the neighbours on sorting out the drive situation - you have a drive so shouldn't have to take a road space anyway. Could your neighbours remove the fence, could you hang out slightly so you can get the back doors open. Tbh if I wanted to park on the road somewhere, for a specific reason, and the person asking had a drive empty- I'm not sure I'd be that sympathetic. Maybe I'm a horrible person (I also hate confrontation so likely I would just move spaces!) So I guess ask and see....

Absolutely speak to her/leave a message on the car.
If she works at the school, contact to ask staff parking locally to be considerate of where they park ie away from obvious front of houses.

I'd just leave a nicely worded note on her car- just to let you know each morning I retuen at 9am to find you parked here all day which means I have to struggle carrying my three month old baby around in his car seat. If you could park somewhere else at least on some days this would be a massive help, thank you!' I wouldn't speak to her in person as she will probably just get defensive and say it's public parking and she can park wherever she likes, which you can't really argue with as it is true.

Personally I think legally parked is a really low bar in a residential area. It’s absolutely a dick move to wait for a resident to move, clearly going on the school run, and jump in the spot if you’re staying all day. Especially if there are other spaces which are not outside someone’s house. I’m biased though, due to the children’s nursery opposite, which wasn’t there when we bought the house and is staffed by people who are incapable of parking one car in one space and have a tendency to sit outside my house running their engines all lunch hour. Inconsiderate parking can really impact on your quality of life.

Alternatively can you stop in road, take baby out in car seat (plus shopping etc and put them safely in house/in garden and then pull into your drive?). If it isn't a really busy road this might be the best plan, I have to do this where I live and know it is a pain but better than schlepping up and down the road with loads of stuff.

Well said!

@Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService parking over the dropped kerb at the end of the driveway which leads to my house does not in any way inconvenience anyone else, in a wheelchair or otherwise. If they want to leave the footpath they can use the dropped kerb at the end of next door’s driveway. If I didn’t have a driveway, there would be no dropped kerb for them to hypothetically use anyway, so they’re no worse off if I’ve parked over mine. The kerb was put in solely to provide access to my house. Who paid for it is irrelevant.
Just a different perspective.

Just pop over and ask her tomorrow, she may think you park on the drive
… where’s the compulsory picture?!?!

Just explain and ask her politely.

The worst that can happen is that she ignores your request.

How much further away do you have to park if she is outside your house?

So you chose a house near a school (that your DC don't go to) without a wide enough driveway for your car, but you want to reserve the spot on the public road.

Why do you need to park right outside your house? If there's plenty of parking in the road, park further along.

The worst that could happen is that the parker asks the OP if she wouldn’t mind moving her car every single day regardless so she can have the space! She needs it more.

I think it's fine to explain and ask politely if she could park elsewhere as long as you understand she's not obligated to agree.