Parking wars

[Whoosher]

Another parking thread I’m afraid. Am I within my rights to ask someone not to park outside my door all day..?
backstory:

We live in a semi detached townhouse with a drive and on street parking, our drive is really thin with a metal gate down the neighbours side, my car doesn’t fit on it - I can’t open the doors both sides, and have 5 children including a baby in a car seat who I can’t get in or out if I park on the drive. So DH parks on the drive and I park on the street directly outside of my house. Attached neighbour parks on the street directly outside of their house. The drives are to the sides of the house so where we park is literally outside of our doors.

My DC go to a school that I have to drive to, but there is a school at the end of the joining road to ours, so at school drop off and pick up time lots of cars come and park on our road and the surrounding roads. I leave for school just as these parents are arriving, so once I’m gone someone parks outside of my house but this causes no issues as they’re always gone by the time I get home.

However, for the past couple of weeks I’ve noticed a car parking on our road and staying there all day - I think they work at the school. The last few weekdays she’s arrived just as I’m getting in the car, she waits for me to go then parks outside my house and stays there all day. I know I don’t own the road and it’s not legally my space, but it’s a big inconvenience as I then have to park down the road, which is annoying when I’ve got a baby in a car seat. When I get shopping etc, I have to either leave the baby in the car down the road or in the house while I go up and down the road bringing the shopping in. I’m always lugging things in and out the car - car seats for older kids etc and it’s annoying especially when it’s raining.

There are plenty of on street spaces that aren’t directly outside of someone’s front door, and she can clearly see that I’ve got a baby.. AIBU to ask her to park somewhere else if she’s going to be there all day?

Just wondering, how big is your car?

If she is waiting for you to move to park outside your house, why can't you just stay there until she has parked somewhere else? She's not going to make herself late by waiting.

OP has to leave to drive her own kids to school

But if she didn't park there, someone else could / would?

At what point do you accept that you don't own the road outside of your house?

If a new neighbour moves in with multiple cars, or an existing neighbours child passes their test and gets a new car? Are you going to moan at them as well?

It's frustrating, I've been there, but that is the joy of little or no off street parking.

Presuming you have a dropped kerb for your drive, can you not park across it?

Do you own the space ? You don't.
There is really no question for debate. Off you pop, lovely.

Parking 'wars'? She's parking in a space that she's entitled to park in. Where's the war? You can ask if she can refrain, but she can say no, of course she can.

You are not unreasonable to ask at all. If I realised I was doing this I'd be mortified at causing a local resident so much distress and id try to minimise it. Yes others are right - you don't have a right but you can ask. Mumsnet is horrible about parking and I often think it shows the worst of us.

She can wait five minutes if it's that important. She clearly sees this woman waiting for the parking space, if it's not free, she isnt going to block the road all day to wait.

she waits for me to go then parks outside my house

There are plenty of on street spaces that aren’t directly outside of someone’s front door, and she can clearly see that I’ve got a baby

Why do you think she waits for you to leave and then parks? What is it about your space over all the other ones on the road?

Maybe she thinks you're leaving for the day.

Anyway, of course you can ask, no one needs to get opinions on whether they can ask a question.

If the other spaces are easy enough for you to point out then surely they're not that far for you to walk?
Also you could pull up, unload your shopping and then park.

It is a pain, but I guess that's the downside of townhouses and/or impractical drives.

Some of these replies are brutal, of course OP knows she doesn't own the road but at the same time it's bloody difficult lugging a baby and shopping and car seats etc around. I'd be highly embarrassed to sit blatantly waiting for someone to head out on the school run so I could park outside their house for the whole day.

OP, I'm guessing there are no other spaces available when this woman parks otherwise she wouldn't wait for yours? But if you know of other spaces, I'd definitely try and have a chat with her and give her some tips of where else to park.

Just be aware that if you have this chat and she continues, you're going to be more annoyed than ever.

I think it must be quite large to fit 5 children, most of whom are in car seats.

This is what you have to think about when you buy a house near a school.

This is what you have to think about when you have 5 children so need a big car and the house you have bought doesn’t accommodate your car - on the drive or garage.

Those are the decisions you have made.

This would be my advice. Park over the end of your driveway

This is literally what the OP is proposing to do!

Yes, assuming you’re going to ask nicely and you won’t get stroppy if she says no, go ahead.

Are most driveways big enough to park a car across? The only one I've ever had wasn't, I couldn't have parked across it without encroaching slightly on nextdoor's drive or using a little bit of the car space outside my house, which obviously wouldn't be free in OP's case.

Remove the gate

If you know you don’t own the road, why ask Mumsnet if you an ask someone a favour regarding parking? 😳

Surely, you pick your moment and have a friendly chat?

You don't own the road and not your legal space. You answered your own Q within it.

It wouldn't hurt to ask.

In the event that she refuses try scattering a bit of bird seed all over the car as soon as her back is turned. I do this under cover of darkness when someone parks outside my gate and it obviously planning to stay the night. By daylight the car is covered in shit and the owner will have no idea why ... They will then try parking somewhere else.

TBH I had twins and would just climb in the back seat from the front - undo the belts and then bring them back in the front with me and out my door

Even if she stopped parking there i am sure someone else will then do so .

Are you sure you can’t use your own drive OP? We had a very narrow parking space at a previous house, designed for coaches to pass through not cars. I used to park very close to the wall on the passengers’ side and that left me enough room on the driver’s side to get everyone out.

Edited to say disregard this as I see the OP has answered it

To answer some questions -

no I can’t park over my drive, it’s on a slight bend so I’d be sticking out and the neighbours opposite have trouble getting onto their drive if I’m parked there - they’ve asked us not to park there where possible and we’ve obliged since it causes them inconvenience

I definitely 100% cannot park on my drive and get the baby in or out. For reference she’s 3 months old so I can’t pull her through the front of the car either

The metal gate is on neighbours side not ours, so I can’t get rid of it

The other spaces on the road are not far no, but they’re an annoying distance away when carrying a car seat and shopping etc, and round a slight bend from our house.

The spaces outside of mine and neighbours homes are the only ones who are directly outside of a front door - all the other spaces are in front of bushes, fences etc

I can’t wait for her to park somewhere else if she’s already out there waiting for me because then my DC would be late to school. and yes someone else would probably park there, but 9/10 times they’re gone by the time I get back from the school run

There’s nothing special about the space I use, but I think she’s clocked that I go out every morning at the same time she needs to park, so if she waits in the road for me to leave she will get a space straight away instead of having to look for one, if that makes sense