Husband wants to move to dubai

[Dilemma87]

My husband is a businessman in property and with the recent proposed tax changes and new rules putting limits on how long he can keep doing things from the UK, he’s now saying he needs to move to Dubai and operate from there.

We actually have some friends there, and his business partner is already based out there, so on paper it all sounds easy enough. His plan is to buy a second property in Dubai and move there by himself, while I stay here with the kids.

The problem is, the children are really settled one’s in high school and the other is due to start soon, so moving them just isn’t an option. He’s suggested that we (me and the kids) fly out to Dubai every school holiday to spend time with him.

The catch is, under his visa he can only be out of Dubai for 90 days a year, so he’d basically have to live there full-time.

AIBU to think this is just not going to work long-term? I can’t help but feel like this is the start of living completely separate lives.

Ok now you are just embarrassing yourself. Stop it.

‘The wealthy aren’t leaving’ you say while typing on a thread about….wait for it…the wealthy leaving the country.

He’d rather stop being a husband and a father than pay a bit more tax? Assuming the extra tax wouldn’t leave you starving and on the street, then he is being very unreasonable.

Sorry OP beginning of the end in my opinion.
Just the fact your husband wants to do this tells you all you need to know.
I would close this down and not give it any air time, prioritising tax avoidance over family, non starter for me.

They are doing a hell of a lot better than they were in their home country before they left where they had no education, income or future. They are at least able to make a
regular salary and send it home to support their familes. Those remittances in turn form a significant part of their home countries economy. The world isn’t perfect. What you see as slave labour to them is the only opportunity anyone has ever offered them.

10%? That sounds high. I have no idea if you are right or not, but it seems rather a large number.

In any case, I'd not be married to someone who put money over relationships.

Ethics don't change with circumstances.
A young person go8ng somewhere else so that one income would be enough and they could buy a house - fine. No ethical issues there. Not entirely sure such a place exits, but if they can find somewhere they can have a better life, great. Go for it.
OP’s husband and his ilk, running away to avoid contributing to a country that gave him the chance to get this wealthy (not taking away from his work at all) but leaving his family to continue to take advantage of the infrastructure he’s not prepared to fund?
Totally different (and immoral).

I think as other PPs have said he wants to go and live the single life in Dubai, shag lots of women, save himself a shedload of tax and then every so often play the doting Dad and husband. What's not to like?

Not sure it's going to be so nice for you though.

Why are you on this little island? I’m sure I can hear Dubai calling you from here, they’re waiting for you with open arms. You’ve been quite tetchy on another thread as well.

Staying in a dump isn’t patriotism. It’s self harm. Or stupidity. Choose your poison.

Glad you are following so closely. You might learn something.

He moves to Dubai like a single guy leaving his wife & kids in uk. Splits up the family unit to save money. He’s considering this as an option to save money?classy

He sounds like a real catch.

I’m not telling you to. You seem to be struggling with the discussion. I’m saying if it’s so much better you can go. Do you live in Dubai?if not, why not?

Maybe the Chancellor should introduce something akin to the USA. All Citizens should file a tax return of all earnings from overseas.
Paying tax based on rights of citizenship.

How to win friends and influence people (not). Are you this friendly in real life lol.

He wants to move abroad so as to avoid paying taxes, but keep his children here benefitting from UK public services? How lovely 😡

I agree he should stay here and pay his taxes.

Also not disrupt his family.

And think about the fact Dubai is build on slave labour, and a deeply misogynistic, homophobic culture.

It's a shithole run on slavery. If he's happy with let him go 👍

‘Hey kids, you won’t hardly see your dad any more because he’d rather not see you than pay the taxes that support the hospitals you go to, and people less fortunate than ourselves.’

what a wonderful role model.

This happened to my friend - herself and her two children ended up moving out there for a few years and then the three of them came back to UK and her husband stayed - finally joining them after a two more years of travelling back and forward.
Their marriage thankfully survived .... but I have the impression both kids struggled with the changes to their education and friendship groups and I know one of them sadly was very upset long-term with their dad although I don't know how things are going now.
Honestly, unless there is a monetry reason that your husband needs to move to Dubai ... wanting to move to Dubai and be apart from you and the kids .... unfortunately is a huge red flag. He has decided that after weighing up to stay in the UK with his family or move to Dubai without his family...he has decided to leave you all. It's heart wrenching for you. Money is not everything - family is.

That’s twice you’ve said I’m embarrassing myself. And yet here I am, totally unembarrassed. And most others on the thread seem to be agreeing with me.
Tell you what would embarrass me? Knowing I was opting out of paying taxes towards infrastructure and services I was leaving my spouse and kids to use.

Always. That’s why people follow so closely. Like you are doing.

Time to get the divorce started.

It will happen anyway and at least that way you can get maintenance put into the financial order rather than going via CMS who can do nothing if he leaves. You may be able to negotiate a far larger final settlement in lieu of future child support if you think that he is the sort who would just not pay once he has gone.

That’s actually a pretty good idea as it goes

But he’s happy to leave his wife and children in the dump and for other taxpayers to pay for services that they use, and for his wife’s salary. Indeed, he seems rather eager to leave them.

That sort of justification doesn’t make it any better, and makes you look…
Well. I’d better not say.