20yo DD was home alone- 2 Proovia delivery came into house and stood over her until she transferred £60 into their own bank account- raging at response

[fanothetan]

Delivery came significantly earlier than agreed, and these men were angry that I had not answered the phone. I work in CAMHS and never take my phone into clinics- . beside the point anyway, I had no reason to think I needed to.
DD knew nothing about the delivery so totally blindsided by how they were behaving. From their demeanour she assumed I had messed up. They brought the item upstairs (I’m third floor) came into the hall and demanded £60 because they had been paid to deliver to the first floor. True, but would not have been an issue if the delivery has arrived at the agreed time. They stood over her while she transferred it on her phone. Understandably she felt scared and did not argue with them, which was the right thing to do.
The response feels like a parody. I phoned and repeatedly ‘corrected’ with variations on ‘your adult daughter’ ‘yes, but she is an adult’. The initial reply to an email was a bald ‘the transaction was cancelled by you’. This was untrue and anyway are either of these responses the point?
After providing evidence and much to-ing and fro-ing there’s no dispute this happened and they say the driver no longe works for them. Having said they would refund the money, they are now saying they won’t, and asking why it’s taken so long to request a refund. Now it’s only £60 and hones, I honestly could not care less, but it speaks volumes and makes me extremely skeptical that any action was taken by them to address this.
The question is can I do anything? I have one of their full names from the bank transfer and their phone number from the repeated phone calls. Taking it to the police seems trivial if it’s about £60 but it’s not, it’s about grown men intimidating a 20 year old girl in her own home. It’s about an employer who clearly give no fucks at all about this and is happy to prevaricate and hand out platitudes rather than respond appropriately.

AIBU to not just suck it up and accept this is how things are? Or should I post the entire email thread which would be hilarious were it not so totally enraging? If there is a constructive way to get this addressed I might be spared an ulcer.

They brought the item into the hall then made her transfer the money. She was home alone so too scared the ask them to leave/ refuse.

because they brought the item into the hall and she was now in the house alone with them. She was too scared to say no.

this is what I was thinking- at least the individual would be flagged?

It’s theft, plain and simple. No way would I be letting it go.

Report it to the police but when you transfer money there’s not much anyone can do. Imagine if banks cancelled transfers based on you saying you didn’t want to do it. People would be doing all sorts to defraud the banks.

People are wild on munsnet 🤣

2 men intimidate a girl to pay money in to their personal bank account not company account if by the company.

” it’s her fault “
“ it’s your fault “

I honestly thought that the company would reimburse the money as much through embarrassment as anything once the company established what happened. They are quite happy to acknowledge what happened but seem entirely unconcerned, and as they can’t reclaim the money back from the driver, they won’t refund it.

The delivery company or the company selling the item?

No way I’m letting it go!

Well done you! can you over the training module your children did for when 2 angry man land on their doorstep. I’d be most obliged. Clearly prepped and ready for any eventuality.

I’m sorry, but your daughter is A GROWN WOMAN. Stop infantilising her.

If you want to quibble the delivery charge, fine. Do that. But it’s completely irrelevant that she’s 20 and I’m not surprised the company are pointing out to you that she’s an adult, because she is. It doesn’t matter whether she’s 20, 30 or 40. She’s not a child.

I only requested a refund after the events had been established. I thought it went without saying but it seems not!

because they brought the item into the hall and she was now in the house alone with them. She was too scared to say no.

@fanothetan Whatever you decide to do reporting-wise, please, please impress on your DD to NEVER let two delivery personnel carry something up to the third floor again (in your house, it’s not a third-floor flat?) For her own safety.

If you have a porch, could items could be left there instead?

The delivery was for me, not some randomer so of course she accepted it. What she couldn’t have foreseen was being intimidated in her own home and forced to transfer money

If they'd only been paid to deliver it to the first floor, why did they take it to the third floor without asking for further payment first?

wow. is it a bedsit situation you live in? And as stated, they demanded the money once they were in the house

Well, interestingly they claim they are not subject to any ombudsman or any other form of oversight. I have posted on trustpilot, and contacted the supplier who have been really responsive.

Please report to police so it doesn’t happen to others. Also contact supplier and check they have terminated their contract with this company, perhaps other companies who use proovia would be interested in the police report too.

I’m incandescent for you and her. At twenty I would absolutely have transferred tje
money

Bloody hell, I hope you are being deliberately obtuse.

The delivery time was agreed. They arrived significantly earlier than agreed. While it is a common misconception that Psychologists can mindread, surprisingly this is untrue, at least for me, but who knows maybe others can. Maybe you can. Just in case the connection is too hard for you, I have already said I work in CAMHS, CAMHS= lots of Psychologists. To clarify further if you remain confused, this last wee bit is called ‘being sarcastic’.

So, daughter had not been told because had they delivered as agreed my husband and I would have been at home. If you need me to explain why this is relevant, don’t hesitate to ask. :)

because I would have been home had they delivered as agreed, they would not have needed to bring it up.

hadn’t actually thought about trading standards- good shout!

Really? And sat in the toilet while two men have run of the house? And you would feel confident that they would respond in time? Surely the priority was for her to be safe, not the loss of £60!

Really? Two adult men demanding money from a woman – any age – and you’re blaming her? They are inside her home. She feels incredibly vulnerable… If you are claiming that you would say, hell no, get out the pair of you: then well done you. Bravo. But the majority of us would be incredibly intimidated and thinking that 60 quid would be worth paying to get them out of our house.

The fact that she is so young IS relevant, as she will not have the life experience that most older people have.

She took a delivery for her mum. Most of us would do that for someone we lived with. Then it went belly up she probably panicked… Can’t blame her for that.

yes- but don't hold out much hope. The awful attitudes are probably trickle down.