‘Just the meat for me please’ Sunday Lunch issue ’

[Mondaytuesdayhappydays]

SIS and BIL coming for Sunday Lunch, bringing DN and her BF- recently engaged.
Got a little gift for them and card etc, my parents were coming any way so invited Sunday for food as makes sense.

SIS has just WhatsApped to say jokingly that the BF -mega gym bunny - ‘doesn’t do potatoes and trimmings- but don’t worry he’ll just pile his plate high with meat’
Im doing a couple chickens and a gammon between us all so plenty for everyone alongside stuffing, veg, Yorkies , gravey, cauliflower cheese etc but definitely not for a huge piled up plate of just meat!

I replied lightheartedly to SIS to this effect and she’s not a happy camper at all.
Just texted to say wants him to feel welcome so will bring him a couple of raw pork chops or similar to fry - I’ve said bring them cooked and sliced already in a Tupperware as I won’t be frying chops with all the carnage of the roast going on and my parents milling about under my feet ‘helping’

Shes voice noting at the moment can see the symbol
honestly am I just old or a shit hostess or is this how guests who barely know their hosts I might add expect to be catered for ???

I mean veggie/vegan all power to you
but a plate piled up of meat for lunch seems a bit full on to me ??

It always has to be meat with these lunk-heads as well doesn't it? Pulses are high in protein (and won't give you bowel cancer) but you never see a gym bro with a Tupperware of dhal or chickpea curry.

CF, if he’s a total gym bunny he can work harder at his next visit.
I’d be tempted to give him fish (tinned tuna) and a rice cake, but I’d probably portion the meat out per plate equally (no penis portions for Mr Universe) and serve everything else to the middle of the table.

I wouldn’t have responded to the “he’ll just eat a plate piled high with meat” and just said right oh, and then when he was there served him a normal to large portion of meat that didn’t leave anyone else short, and if there were enough for seconds of course offer some. It’s his look out if he wants to openly ask for more meat than would be fair for him to have based on how much there is and how many are around the table.

what would you do if someone sat down for dinner and said oh I only like potatoes can I just have a plate full of spuds please? Do that.

Is very important TO HIM.

In actual terms of importance it is less than zero.

I understand diet and training needs, and I've never been such a plonker as to think that other people need to be warned in advance of my pwecious wants.

I'd just fill up a bit before I went, take slightly more meat after everyone else had had a reasonable amount, take a few veg and potatoes to be polite, and leave half of those.

I also think you took a flippant comment a little too seriously.

I would have just served up as planned and just give BF the benefit of the doubt that he would not take more than a fair share due to good manners. If on the day he does take too much then that is hardly your fault - sounds like there will be plenty of food to go around.

@TriggeredNameChanger- you’re right- veganism is a preference. But it’s usually fuelled by very strongly held beliefs about animal cruelty and/or the environment. So it’s a preference with a belief system behind it. I wouldn’t feed pork to Muslim or Jewish guests, or beef to a Hindu. A family member is married to a woman who is Jain and her religion dictates that she can’t eat meat or eggs. Many Jains don’t eat dairy either so they are vegan. As I am an atheist and not a vegan, they’re all the same thing to me. I don’t personally adhere to any of these belief systems but I will respect the dietary restrictions of each.

A man who is (presumably temporarily) eating like an obligate carnivore is making a choice that has nothing to do with belief systems or faith. So I wouldn’t feel I had to respect it or pander to it.

All well and good when it's just your own friends, but people tend to come with hangers-on! What if one of your friends fell in lurrrrve and brought someone round like this guy, and she wanted you to accommodate him??

Reminds me of one of my Mum's most repeated stories told to her by her mother. My great-grandfather died when his younger children were still at school and my great-grandmother must have had some very tough times just putting food on the table (1910s). One day she had bought a tiny piece of beef and boiled it with barley, beans, vegetables etc. The idea was that there would be bread on the table and the main part of the meal would be the broth, with each person also getting a few shreds of beef. A man came to visit and was invited to stay for lunch. He took all the beef for himself. He probably assumed it was one slice, as there wouldn't have been much of it, but what a selfish, entitled thing to do to a widow and her hungry children. Always makes me very angry about this ancient injustice when I hear it!

No. Not at the moment. She was eating loads up until a month ago when this new one started. I’m hoping she’ll move on to the next one soon. I think she’s read loads about all the pesticides or whatever is in them. She’s quite particular. I have asked her about fibre and she says she gets enough from berries.

it’s difficult. She’s 16 and points out if I ever raise it that most of her age eat sugar/upfs/junk/alcogol/monster, of which she eats none, which is much worse.

as long as she moves back to veg soon, I’m ok.

It’s quite obviously different - for me (a coeliac) to eat gluten would make me seriously unwell, both in the immediacy and the long term with things like risk of cancer, infertility, loads of stuff.
For the gym bunny to eat some brocolli will what..? Make him a bit sad?!

He might be really embarrassed to learn she asked this on his behalf. I'm doing a high protein diet at the moment and if I go to someone's house I just adapt to what's given to me and maybe bring my own high protein snacks to have on the way/way back. I would be so embarrassed if someone said something like this on my behalf. Also even if you are a gym goer you should still eat veg or he'll end up mega constipated! Mind you, keep that thought to yourself if you don't want to cause more drama 😂

I worked with someone in the early noughties who use to eat a whole chicken for lunch when he was trying to bulk up some muscle. Quite literally he would get a whole rotisserie chicken and just sit there and eat it at his desk like some sort of cave man!

🤣🤣🤣

I'd be tempted to cook a vegan or vegetarian main for lunch and serve zero meat. CF.
But honestly those mountains of meat, while very fashionable atm, are not good for people's digestive tracts.

The cave man diet is what it’s called I think. Eat like they used to eat. Nothing for breakfast. One big meal of as much meat as you can get. Zero chemicals. I’m sure there will be loads of videos on TikTok detailing all its virtues.

Looks like I'm an outlier but I'd just buy some extremely easy to prepare additional meat. Something that you can just throw in the oven. Your sis wants him to feel welcome and to get along well with his extended family. I dont think it's such a terrible request. She could get some meat herself but maybe she kind of wants to impress upon him how nice and accommodating you are?

Bad form. Ignore and do what you were planning to do. The chicken and gammon will be more than enough. Do you carve at the table? Serve ladies first. Let everyone help themselves to veg etc and make no comment whatsoever about what he chooses to put on his plate.

I don’t know what you’re getting at, sorry.

So this pair of adults don’t understand that, while no one will force you to eat your greens, you only get YOUR share of the meat???

Ridiculous.

The meat is the most expensive part of the meal and it's absolutely not reasonable for any one person to get more than their fair share. If there's going to be 8 people around the table you divide the available meat between 8 portions (I think on this occasion if you need there to be leftovers to use in the week ahead you need to reserve that before serving the rest. It's the height of unwarranted privilege for one persin to declare that they are too superspecial to make up the rest of their plateful with vegetables thereby depriving others by taking or asking for more than the ⅛th that is each person's fair portion - but yes bringing his own (cooked and ready to eat) extra meat is fair enough.

"Buy some extra meat" is not a reasonable solution. You'll barely get one more mouthful of meat for the price of a kilogram of carrots. It's not a fair or reasonable demand for a guest to make.

1kg of Chicken legs (4) are just £2 in Lidls. I doubt he'll eat 4 chicken legs!

All these people saying ‘just throw in an extra tray of chicken thighs’, do you have unlimited oven space? If I was cooking a roast for 11 I’d have every shelf carefully accounted for in the timing plan. I guess if he doesn’t care they’re cold from the fridge having been cooked several hours earlier!

@ExtraOnions Even if he is training for something he is deluded if he thinks he will absorb all the peptides and amino acids from a massive amount of meat unless he addresses fibre and co-factors (required for enzymes to be active)
He is just lining himself up for the most horrible bowel situation.